If you choose to host guests at your home, it’s very likely that you want them to feel welcome and accommodated. This can entail many things, from cleaning your home and stocking up on essentials to preparing food and drinks, while considering preferences, allergies, and restrictions. However, not every host is considerate of these things, even though they should be.
Like this MIL, who, no matter how hard her DIL tried, couldn’t get her to accommodate her dietary restrictions. Finally, having had enough of leaving her family dinners always hungry, she decided not to attend ever again.
Good hosts should consider their guests' dietary preferences and restrictions
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
This MIL completely ignored this, leaving her DIL starving at every family dinner
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: dandyrose05
"I believe the host should have at least one dish that can accommodate restrictions"
Image credits: unsplash (not the actual photo)
As we can see from the story, living with dietary restrictions often presents challenges to people. Some of the most frustrating, perhaps, are navigating social situations and dealing with a lack of understanding from others. Since people with not-self-chosen dietary restrictions already have a lot on their plate, overcoming challenges daily, the least their loved ones could do is make them feel like a welcomed and accommodated guest in their home by honoring their dietary restrictions, with many experts agreeing with this.
“As someone who plans a lot of menus and hosts a lot of dinners, I regard it as an affirmation of friendship and support to accommodate and celebrate my guests’ dietary restrictions,” said Brian Theis, author of the book “The Infinite Feast: How to Host the Ones You Love.” “I even think of it as an inspiration and a challenge.”
“In my opinion, if the host is aware of certain food allergies or dietary restrictions prior to the gathering, I believe the host should have at least one dish that can accommodate those restrictions,” agreed food blogger Gabrielle Lask.
To accommodate dietary restrictions successfully, experts say that hosts should encourage guests to share their nutritional needs ahead of time, and the guests should feel comfortable doing so.
That said, the hosts shouldn’t be forced to alter all their dishes to meet one person’s dietary needs, but if they choose to do so, everyone can enjoy the menu without announcing the accommodations.
A similar thing also applies to personal dislikes, which hosts shouldn’t bend over backward to cater to. “Most cooks respond well to accommodating a true dietary restriction,” food columnist Lynn Schwartzberg said. “Sometimes a guest may share a personal dislike. I would not feel compelled to accommodate this. Adults can just grow up.”
Guests with dietary restrictions should have an option to bring their own food, but it's not mandatory
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
If hosts can’t accommodate guests’ dietary needs, they should let them know about that in advance.
“This way, guests with dietary restrictions can plan accordingly. Or they might even offer to bring their own take on that dish to share, making your job as a host a little bit easier,” said Diana Edelman, founder of the food blog Vegans, Baby.
As Edelman mentioned, guests with dietary restrictions should have an option to bring their own food, but that shouldn’t be mandatory.
“It’s not rude to bring your own food, as long as it’s handled appropriately such as asking the host first and making a dish that others can enjoy, too,” said Olivia Wyles, keto diet blogger and founder of Easy Keto Recipes Made For Real Life. “It’s also important not to draw attention to yourself. Make it about the event and not your diet.”
“Bringing your own food and sharing this with others also often sparks curiosity and creates a conversation about those dietary restrictions and chosen lifestyles,” she said.
But in more extreme cases of food allergies, the guests may want to eat beforehand, Schwartzberg suggested. “If the allergies or condition is so severe that bringing one’s own food is the only solution, that person should eat in advance and simply enjoy the social event, perhaps nibbling something that fits their restrictions.”
Many commenters sided with the original poster
While some thought she could've let it slide
Some even blamed both sides
