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35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Social IssuesMAR 24, 2021

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"

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Our behavior, and the actions that follow it, speak more than thousands of words. So often all you need to do is to sit back and watch people. Remember your male colleague who always uses that patronizing tone of voice when talking to you? Yes, it’s annoying, and no, he doesn’t sense it.
But what if it’s a tell-tale sign that the guy has internalized toxic masculinity? What if this is a precise indication that he feels insecure or somewhere deep down, even threatened by you? You may only speculate or see what guys have to say on the subject matter themselves.
The question “What is a tell-tale sign that a man is insecure about his masculinity or himself in general?” on r/AskMen got a bunch of people sharing what they think are the red flags. And it’s truly eye-opening!

#1

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
If he claims to be an “alpha male” - dude, if you have to tell people (loudly and often) that you’re alpha, you are definitely not
172points

#2

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Homophobia
155points

#3

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
When he doesn’t let his girlfriend/wife wear sexy outfits in public
128points

In daily life, we come across numerous examples of what we think is men’s anxiety about violating the male gender role. Like, a man hesitating to hug his male friends in public. Often, we jump up to conclusions and don’t give it a second thought.

But according to Jennifer Bosson, a social psychologist at the University of Texas at Austin, this may come down to how people think about manhood. She proposes that “manhood, relative to womanhood, has historically been viewed as both elusive and tenuous.”

By “elusive,” Jennifer means “that manhood is not considered a developmental certainty, but instead is seen as a status that must be earned via action.” And by “tenuous,” she is referring to the idea that “manhood status, once earned, can be lost with relative ease, via a wide range of social shortcomings.”

#4

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
His view on what makes a man a man is narrow. In his mind, there are only 2-3 types of men and other types are wrong
118points

#5

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Constant attempts to "one-up" anything and anyone at anytime.
112points

#6

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Worrying about face and honour and fighting over it.
I've never been in a fight. 99% of my friends have never been in a fight. None of my colleagues have ever been in a fight.
Yet... you come across these f**wits who seem to think that it's normal. Quite often they complain about it. "Aw I can barely leave my house without someone starting sh*t".
In every single scenario, it is them who is the problem
109points

These may, of course, seem ancient today, but they do emerge in daily discourse, says Jennifer. According to the psychologist, “Men—even those who are perfectly 'secure in their masculinity'—are aware that their manhood is precarious and that they may, at any moment, lose manhood status in other people’s eyes.”

“Until widespread beliefs about the elusiveness and tenuousness of manhood change, it may be unrealistic to expect the average man to violate gender role norms with ease,” she concluded in her research.

#7

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Trying to dominate a conversation or activity for no reason/Being needlessly competitive
107points

#8

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
My friend introduced me to a potential love interest of hers one evening. The conversation turned to what I look for in a guy and I said I like guys who own cats. The dude immediately cut me off and said ‘I’m sorry, there’s nothing wrong with a woman who owns a cat, but there’s something wrong with a guy who does.’ The next day my friend asked me what I thought of him and I told her he’s insecure
106points

#9

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Always fighting to be right no matter what, even if someone obviously knows what they are talking about.
102points

#10

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Trying to crush your hand when they shake it. Usually accompanied by fixing you with what they think is an intimidating stare.
99points

#11

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
When he's not supportive of the other men in his life. A truly masculine man loves and supports his brothers and celebrates their achievement
An insecure man brings others down to prove he's on "top"
98points

#12

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Any guy who thinks the words alfa and beta mean anything in a social group
81points

#13

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
When someone gets upset over something as silly as the way another man enjoys his comfortable clothing, takes care of their body, or the way they like their vehicles.
77points

#14

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Aggression and violence. Many insecure men use tactics of intimidation or just plain old violence because they feel attacked by everything, cant discuss like a normal grown up, feel like it proves they are a "real man" etc.
76points

#15

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
The worst are guys who use hashtags on instagram like #realman, #realmen, #realmenhavebeards, #manly, #man, #men, #alphamale, #intelligent, #smart, etc.
I'm like dude, I've never seen a confident masculine man ever once use [things[ like that. If you have to tell the world you're a "real man", or how "intelligent" or "alpha", you are... you aren't. hahaha
75points

#16

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Pretending to know something about a subject they don’t understand.
72points

#17

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
When i was in the army we would definitely see people who were bullied in high school and decided to be "billy badass" and join the military then they would be teased and hazed a little as privates. But as soon as they got their own little team and a taste of power they would be the ones that made everyone's lives much more miserable than they needed to be reveling in being the tormenter.
69points

#18

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
won't let his girl have friends
67points

#19

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Guys who brag about how much sex they have. Ok we get it, you have sex
63points

#20

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?"
Constantly looking for the need to brag about your wealth and physical prowess, especially on social media. I know a few dudes who define themselves by the amount of money they've made or how they're better than everyone because they practice a certain martial art
62points
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