“I Have Never Felt Worse For A Human Being In My Life”: Taxi Drivers Share The Craziest Stories

I drove a cab in Boston for a couple of years. I got some stories. Best one was when some guy was robbing cabbies and they’d been looking for him for several weeks. Usually he was being picked up around China town. Well, one late Sunday afternoon I pick up this regular looking young man in China Town. He gets in and he wants to go to Revere. Cool, good fair. I make a comment or two and he says nothing, just looking out the window. That’s it, nothing else has happened, he’s a nice looking young man and there’s nothing for me to worry about, but, the hair in the back of my neck stands up and I suddenly know this is the dude.

This all happens about three blocks. I’d just gotten married and my wife worried about me so I’d recently gotten my first cell phone. It was an Erickson phone in a little leather case and the phone had a little, green led light on the to front when it was on. It was laying on the passenger seat. I reached over, picked up the phone and hung it on the center A/C vent. As soon as I stopped at the traffic light at the end of that block dude bailed out and ran like his a*s was on fire.

I was happy to see him go.

The number of times I picked up demented old people who were running away from their care facility.

I drove for Uber for years. Lots of crazy funny stories. I kept narcan on me and used it a couple of times. I did have a guy pull a knife on me, so I d**g him out of my car. He was a super skinny d**g addict, in a 6'5" bear. 

But honestly, the Conservative guy going off on gun rights and then pulls a hand gun out and starts waving it around. Oh and he was aggressively drunk. Legitimately feared for my life. Just tried to stay quiet and agree with him on everything. I drove as fast as I could. Drive lasted 40ish minutes. 

I have a concealed carry permit, but never carried. It was only for convenience when I went to the range. Really considered starting to after that. It was also the first time I really considered that we need those involved in DV to have their gun rights taken away. This guy was clearly an abuser. .

Classmate of mine was a former taxi driver. Had a well-dressed man, probably in his 50s, get in with a woman that was probably 30 years younger, and requested to go to the airport. As soon as they get in they start engaging in full blown sexual intercourse in the back seat. The taxi driver ignores this until he warns them that they're only 5 minutes from the airport, to which the guy asks him to drive in circles for another 15 minutes. Since the meter is running he's happy to oblige. They wound up leaving like a 50% tip. so he didn't mind doing a quick wipe-down of the seat after they left.

I drove for Uber for a while during the pandemic. This popped up in my FB memories a few days ago:

My BFF and I were just talking about a relationship thread on reddit and she said she thought it was fake, since it was a little crazy and possibly implausible. I found it pretty believable, because I think people are f*****g insane and told her this Uber story that I forgot to share.

I picked up a couple a few weeks ago, in the middle of the night, and I could hear them yelling at each other on the curb before I even pulled up. Both drunk, coming from a family party. They got in and proceeded to scream at each other the entire ride about how someone at the party had disrespected the dude and the lady didn't have his back.

As I'm approaching their exit on the expressway, the dude is like pull over, let me out, take the next exit! I was taking the exit anyway, so when I got up to the light at the end of the ramp, he jumps out of the car and starts walking away. The light turns green and I ask her if I should just go or what?

There was nowhere for me to pull over and I couldn't block traffic. She said yes, he'll find his own way home (her dropoff was still about a mile and a half away) so I go. And as we're driving the last 3 minutes to her house, she very calmly calls her cell carrier, gives what I presume is his number, says she's thinks she lost her phone with that number somewhere in her house but just in case, can they please deactivate it?

Stone cold.

This is her FIANCE. Who just got out of the car miles from home on a random road, and now has no cell service.

I actually drove back in that direction after I dropped her off, but I didn't see him along the road between where I dropped her and the exit ramp where he got out. I don't know where he went, but I didn't find him. I was going to give him a ride home if I had.

So anyway...yeah. People are crazy petty, toxic, vindictive, you name it. Nothing surprises me anymore.

Not a driver but out of high school I was a dispatch and driver coordinator. One day I had a guy who kept calling in for a cab and the rides would get dropped for being missed. He tells me he’s asking for someone to pay 58 dollars for bail, and whoever bails him out will get to take their pick of like a tv or basically anything they wanted when they dropped him off. I tell him sure, I’ll take him up on the offer if he hasn’t been bailed out by 5 am when my shift ended I would drive to get him personally. No idea what the dude did. I assumed alcohol or dui related.

So I bail this dude out, drive him home and got a Samsung flat screen for 58 dollars and the cost of gas round trip. Lives in this nice a*s house, says he’s a pharmaceutical rep, got popped for possession and a dui.

Two months later this dude calls me back and says he’d give me his whole nice a*s living room furniture if I drive him to rehab 3 hours away. I was so tempted but I couldn’t free up time for that type of trip.

This was in 2014, looking back I was f*****g nuts.

Uber pickup at a residential house. Middle of evening rush hour I ended up having to cut someone off pretty bad as I needed to get over to make a right. He honks, throws the finger, mouths off something, etc... w/e these things happen sometimes. It's about a 12-15 minute drive to the customer's house from here.

Anyways, this guy starts 'following me'. 3-4 side streets onto the highway. Takes the same exit as me 1-2 miles down. 3-4 more side streets until I reach the customer's house which is located inside a col de sac. This guy pulls up to the house RIGHT NEXT to the customer.

I've been on somewhat high alert for awhile at this point as I noticed he's been right behind me this whole time, but now I knew something was about to go down. Whether he's gonna yell at me, wants to fight, or something worse, I just sat in my car looking his way trying to figure out what my next move is.

So this guy exits his vehicle very assumingly, doesn't look my way at all, walks around and grabs something from the passenger's seat and then just walks to his door. WTF, really? Even if I didn't cut this guy off badly, I would've noticed the same car behind me for so long. Just happens he's going to the same exact place? Boring ending, I know, but what are the odds?

Picked a guy up, and he was kind of stand-offish, but not overtly rude. We get to his destination, and he goes to open the door, and it won’t open. Somehow the child lock had been engaged. This guy starts flipping out like I’m trying to kidnap him or something, and is screaming in a high pitched voice that his door won’t open and he’s trapped. I just hopped out and ran around the car and opened the door, because trying to tell him it was just the child lock wasn’t stopping him from screaming like a woman. Once I opened the door he stopped screaming, but he kept looking at me and wouldn’t turn his back to me as he backed away. Maybe don’t take rides from strangers from now on my guy.

This time I had a drunk old woman in the back of the cab - it was late she wanted to go home and stop at an Indian take out, I said okay but to be clear she can’t eat the food in the cab, after the wait and on the way home she opens the take out…..

Pours in on the seat, pulls down her nickers and squirms in it…..

Ffs.

Not a taxi driver but did Uber. One time this drunk couple was leaving the car and the boyfriend face planted and was bleeding from his face. I asked them if they needed help and the girl was just like “it’s all good, he does this all the time”. I think about that sometimes.