Social IssuesMAR 4, 2022

Women Share 28 Subtle Power Moves They Do To Spread Feminism

102

Since the mid-19th century, organized feminist movements in the United States have fought for women's political, economic, and cultural freedom. But as one current TikTok trend shows us, you can fight gender inequality even by yourself, as part of your everyday routine.

It started in January when user Molly Barrie uploaded a video, inviting people to share their "subtle feminist power moves" they do on the regular, and it wasn't long before the clip spread all over the platform. So since International Women's Day is right around the corner, we at Bored Panda thought it would be interesting to check out some of the most popular submissions.

#1

Women Share 28 Subtle Power Moves They Do To Spread Feminism

I work in a very male-dominated industry. It is not unusual for top executives to get very disrespectful or raise their voice in a meeting where they’re not getting their way without fail. Every time that happens, I hit them with ‘Oh, I’m just sensing that you’re getting very emotional right now, I think we should all take a five minute break to allow your time to get a hold of your feelings'.

thereal.hb

Report

444points

A century after the 19th Amendment was ratified in the United States, the Pew Research Center found that the majority of Americans (57%) say that the country has not gone far enough to give women equal rights with men.

Among those who think the country still has work to do in achieving gender equality, 77% highlight sexual harassment as a major obstacle to women having equal rights with men, 67% point to women not having the same legal rights as men, 66% aren't happy with different societal expectations for men and women, and 64% say not enough women are in positions of power.

To learn more about the things these women are going through, we contacted part-time project officer/part-time blogger and full-time feminist from England, Nyomi Winter.

"I noticed sexism most once I had children," the founder of the online magazine Nomipalony told Bored Panda. "The expectation that you will be primary carer whilst you try to maintain a career is really challenging. We aren't making nearly enough progress with the gender pay gap and in turn the pension pay gap. Workplace changes could make an enormous difference to equality."

#2

In group social settings, when a man interrupts a woman, I don’t look at him. I continue to look at the woman he interrupted. Then I interrupt him and say ’Wait, what were you saying?’ to the woman. She always smiles.

hannahthawriter

Report

342points

But even though feminist movements have attracted significant attention in Europe and North America in recent years, only fewer than one in five young women would call themselves a feminist, polling in the UK and US suggests.

It could be that they do not feel the term speaks to them or due to the stereotypes and misconceptions associated with feminism. ("Feminists don't wear makeup, they don't shave their legs, and they hate all boys.")

But Nyomi is happy with the direction the movement is going in; she believes that today's feminists are progressive and more intersectional than ever. "I'm so impressed by today's young feminists. We are more aware of 'white feminism' and I think the Black Lives Matters movement has really pushed the Global Ethnic Majority to the front of the conversation in the past couple of years."

#3

So I am a tall woman. I’m about 5'10, 5'11ish and if I’m going to be going into a meeting where I know that there’s going to be a man who’s going to try to speak over me or belittle me or throw his weight around, I will purposefully wear the largest heels, like the biggest heels that I have, which make me like 6'2, 6'3 so that I can stand next to them and look down on them and remind them that not only am I a match for you intellectually, but I could step on you.

awomanwithnonameShaunna

Report

315points

TikTok user Emily Tangerine is one of the people who responded to Molly with a video of her own. "I came across this trend on my 'For You' page," Emily told Bored Panda. "I follow a ton of women who are comedians and professionals in their respective fields and activists. So this prompt was surely going to come my way."

She thinks misogyny in today's society is a really complex system. "I'd say the most oppressive force of it that is visible is the legislation that directly targets women (but will surely affect those who don’t identify as female but have a uterus) and somehow it doesn't affect men," Emily said. "Like the Texas abortion ban. There is currently no legislation against men's bodies, yet we all know it takes two to tango."

However, Emily sees women's lives improving as the older generation of men who are trying to instigate these laws fade into oblivion. "I see more and more women enrolling in college and that's going to help the situation. And I see more and more women stand up for themselves in social situations. "I stood up to my old male professor just this Friday. Women aren't allowing men to treat them like dog shit anymore and that eventually leads to legislation. Heck, we might even get one more woman on the Supreme Court."

#4

I often claim that men don’t have arms. Hear me out. So I was having a conversation with a co-worker recently and she was talking about how she wanted her son to marry a woman who could cook. And I said ‘why?’ And she said ‘Well, he can’t cook’ And I said ‘Oh my God, does he not have arms?’ And then she was like ‘no, he’s just a man’ And I was like ‘But he has arms’ And then she just had to explain that he was going to depend on a woman to feed him for the rest of his existence with like, two whole arms. So yeah, men don’t have arms.

mlerelEmily

Report

271points

"Sometimes [the situation] feels really bleak (like with the recent tragic murders of Sarah Everard, Bibaa Henry, Nicole Smallman, and Sabina Nessa)," Nyomi added. "But I do think that social media has opened up conversations that we just weren't having in the mainstream a decade ago."

"The Me Too Movement has led to real industry changes (including arrests). The movement following Sarah Evarard's murder led to an outpouring from women on social media the likes of which I've never seen. I wrote 20 actions men can take to be better allies to women at this time and it was one of my most-read posts that year. Yes, change is too slow but we have to have hope that it's coming and in the meantime, we keep fighting!"

And they're not the only optimists. More than eight-in-ten Americans who say that the country has not gone far enough to give women equal rights with men say this is very (31%) or somewhat likely (53%) in the future. Let's hope so!

#5

When I ran a preschool and a child would get sick and a parent would need to be called to come pick up their child, I called the dad, whether it was a two-parent household or co-parenting, whatever it was, I'd always call the father, and their first question was ‘Did you call their mom?’ And I would say either ‘no, I have not. I figured I’d call you first. What would you like to do? How soon can you be here?’ Most of them would get upset, or they were just inconvenienced by the fact that they would have to stop working to come get their child. After I would speak to the dad, I would call the moms and let them know ‘Hey, your child is sick. However, I got a hold of their dad and he's coming to get them.’ And the moms were generally in shock and surprised and I always got thanked because I didn’t interrupt their workday.

mimiq84

Report

265points

#6

When I’m cat-called, and I feel safe to do so, I will respond in one of two ways. I’ll either look at my phone and tell them what time it is to make them think I thought they asked me what time it was, or I say ‘sorry, I don’t have any change’ to make them think that I thought that they were asking me for money.

shelleyellehs

Report

261points

#7

This is my favorite thing to do. Whenever someone references a man who was a genius or a top of his field, I’m like ‘OK, I got it. So he’s like the Serena Williams of like bankers or financers’ or whatever the field is. And it’s even better if he’s an athlete.

lizplank

Report

257points

#8

I used to work in the call center for an airline and when people would call in to do a seat assignment for their families like mom, dad and two kids, I would always put the dad with the two kids because of course, it’s only three seats. And then I would put the mom across the aisle so she could sit by herself and dad would have to look after the kids during the flight.

tammi.dann

Report

253points

#9

I do this constantly. I’ve been doing it for years. It actually bothers my boyfriend whenever we go out because he doesn’t understand why I do it until I explain it to him. I never move out of the way. I will let a man walk into me before I move because they are so used to just not interrupting their time and just to proceed forward and keep moving until they’re in my line. And I just keep walking. I’ve been shoulder checked. I’ve been everything, but I’m like 'If you’re not moving, I’m not moving'. Haven’t moved for a man in years.

bridalbabe03Liz

Report

251points

#10

I learned this from my older brother, who is a very intimidating attorney and has been my hero for most of my life. We’re taught, especially as women, that when we’re listening to somebody, we do active listening, right? You’re nodding, you’re raising your eyebrows, you’re tilting your head, you’re showing them ‘I’m warm, I’m open, I’m receiving you’. The best medicine for when somebody is talking at you or talking down to you is - stop it. The only thing you have to do to show somebody that you’re listening to them is to just stare them. Dead in the face. They don’t like it, especially with stillness. Don’t like it.

ghostunderrocks

Report

228points

#11

So I’ve stated on my TikTok before that I’m an axe throwing instructor and I’ve been doing it for a couple of years, right? My favorite type of men that come to the venue are the ones who bring their dates or their girlfriends to show off that they are so good at doing a manly activity because axe throwing is such a manly activity and that, you know, they have the expectation by default because they’re a man, they’re going to be so good at this, right? But come inside range, who is the one that is getting bull’s eyes? Who is the one that is consistently getting it on the board? Who is the one that listened to every single one of my instructions? That’s right. The Valkyrie, the woman. I love her. Proud of her. Then you got buddy boy on this side who cannot get it on the board for the life of him because he hasn’t listened to any of my instructions because he didn’t acknowledge my presence as an axe throwing instructor. And he’s getting so upset that he is not getting it on the board and that's adding onto the fact that she is getting it on the board more than he is. And I see how fragile the ego is. So what do I do? I make it worse. I make it worse. I no longer acknowledge baby boy over here. I go to the star of the show, the Valkyrie, and I’m giving her all the praises that she deserves, in which I’m like ‘Yes, you are so good at this for your first time. Are you sure this is your first time? I’m so impressed’ and which is all true. And then I’d be like ‘You know, you should totally join our league. I think you’d thrive in it’, which is also true. And I love it. I love it. I loved rubbing it in his face.

jessedioza

Report

206points

#12

I have repeatedly been asked to take notes during meetings and then distribute them afterwards. It’s not my job. So I started just not taking anything into the meeting, no paper, no pen, no computer, my cell phone, but I would normally keep it in my lap so that people didn’t know I had my cell phone with me. And then if I needed to remember something or if there was like an important date, I could use my phone to mark it. But I didn’t let people see me taking notes on it. And what I realized is that men don’t ask other men to take notes. It was only when I had paper in front of me that somebody would be asked to take notes. Otherwise they seem totally capable of remembering what happens in the meeting.

poweredbychampagne

Report

186points

#13

Every time I create a signing session for any of my married couples buying or selling their house, I always make the wife the first signer.

mollybarrie

Report

171points

#14

I don’t believe in cohabitation with men. I have a wonderful long-term partner who is arguably a better person than I am. And we don’t live together and we’ll never live together. And I try to talk about this whenever it comes up because I want women to know that there’s other alternatives. You don’t have to live with men. You don’t. You can have wonderful long-term relationships. There are other options. At this stage in the game I just feel like we all still have too much patriarchal conditioning to have balanced domestic situations. I think it’s still almost pretty much most of the time short end of the stick for women to live with men.

theluckyadventures

Report

164points

#15

As a feminine-presenting person who does not shave their body hair, I get my fair share of unsolicited comments from men about my body. The best response I’ve discovered to them is to just look at them dead in the face and say ‘Did you mean to say that out loud?’ Most of the time they’ll just squirm and not have anything to offer up, but on the rare occasions they do follow up with something stupid, I just let them know how stupid they are by saying ‘Ok, big guy’.

honeyandmud

Report

149points

#16

This isn’t subtle, but I do it regularly. About 10 years ago, I was twenty-two years old and a freshly graduated college student in my very first office job, and my supervisor’s name was Rob. At the time, I was still identifying as a woman. Today I’m trans non-binary, and I know that back then when I was dressing really feminine, like aggressively feminine, it was because I was in denial and I was trying to assert my femininity when I knew deep down, it didn’t fit me. I’ve always been tall, like in the 5'9 range and height is not considered a very feminine trait. And so I was very insecure about my height. And that made it kind of difficult when Rob, very early on in my tenure at this place, came up to me and said ‘Hey, you need to start wearing heels to work’. I was wearing flats because guess what? I walk like a baby giraffe in heels. But I did, as he said, and I got a pair of heels. And at our next meeting, I walked in, toddled in wearing them, and Rob looked me up and Rob looked me down and Rob realized with horror, oh no, the office girl is his height. Almost exactly. Suddenly, I went from being the cute little feminine office girl to, I guess, a physical threat because I was his height. This was a miscalculation on Rob’s part, obviously, but it could not go unchallenged because then, from then on, every time I entered the room, he made sure I was sitting down and he was standing up. If he entered the room when I was standing, he would somehow get me to sit down, offer me a chair, whatever. If I came into his office to talk, he would make me sit down and then he would stand up and sit on the edge of his desk. So he was kind of looming over me. And it was really clear that he was intimidated by my physical presence and did not like the fact that I was that tall. But also he wants to look at the cute office girl in heels. And I thought this was f**king ridiculous. I’m uncomfortable in these shoes. You’re uncomfortable with me in these shoes. And yet here you are, making sure you’re always the dominant physical presence, this is exhausting. What’s wrong with you? I’m proud of twenty-two-year-old me for being able to recognize that something about the situation was wrong, because what twenty-two-year-old me did, I’m still proud of to this day. I marched myself down to the shoe store and I bought the tallest heels I could find that were still workplace appropriate. I mean, I’m talking like a pair of designer heels with a big old platform under the toe and a very tall stiletto heels. Totally workplace appropriate. But Jesus Christ, I was like six three. Rob did not like the fact that I was now even taller than him. Not one bit. So one day I’m at my desk adjusting my shoe and he sidles up, sees me doing it, and that’s his moment, he says ’You know you don’t have to wear those shoes anymore if you don’t want to. You can go back to flats. It’s fine. Just a suggestion, only if you want to. Did I go back to flats, though? Not on your life. The heels stayed, and now I’m actually pretty good at walking in them, thanks to Rob, despite coming out as non-binary, now I know most of the world looks at me and immediately thinks ‘Woman’. And you know what? That’s honestly on them. But what I carry with me from that experience to this day is when I know I’m going to walk into a room and be underestimated, I rock those heels. Suck it, Rob.

star_sama13

Report

141points

#17

So I got three. So if a man ever interrupts me, I let him finish. Go for it. I don’t want to interrupt you because it’s not polite. And as soon as he finishes, I go ‘So as I was saying’ and just continue because my point was still valid, and I’ll also do this like if another woman is interrupted, I’ll be like ‘So as you were saying’. The next one is - I will not step out of the way of someone. You don’t own this world any more than I do. I’m going to keep walking with shoulders high, eyes forward. If you shoulder check me, that’s on you. I also will not apologize. This last one, this is where the subtlety kind of goes out the window. I handle all of the home projects for our house. My husband is just there to lift heavy stuff and look cute. But there have been a lot of times where we’ve been working with someone, and I will be asking the questions and they will be looking at my husband as if he’s talking. So I’ll just step in front of my husband until I have eye contact and then I’ll keep speaking.

sendhelportacos

Report

135points

#18

When a man is not nice to a non-man in my gym, I will follow him around and do his entire workout. But I’ll add 20 to 100 pounds to whatever it is that he’s doing. I’ll also make sure that he knows that he can just leave the bar loaded because I’m probably just going to warm up with that weight, even if I didn’t intend to do the workout on that day. I follow him around and I embarrass him. If he’s rude to one of my homies. Pushes me a little harder than I’m used to. And also just, you know, makes me feel better about myself. So party on.

warmaiden_official

Report

128points

#19

See now how in a lot of structures in our society, male is the default setting for a lot of people, like when you say ‘Oh, that doctor, that lawyer, that whatever,’ people just kind of assume that they’re male. When I started realizing this, I was like, ‘That’s stupid, it shouldn’t be the default setting’. Clearly, all of these professions are filled with women, so any time I refer to someone in a place of power or a position of a career, I automatically gender it female. ‘Oh, have I told you about how great my orthodontist is now?’, ’How is she? Do you like her?’

emily_tangerineEmily

Report

124points

#20

The first one is that whenever I’m addressing an envelope to a couple, I always put the woman’s name before the man’s name. The second one is that as an elementary school music teacher, sometimes in the classroom, I’ll need chairs or tables moved. And so I always ask, I need strong students to move this for me, and I always pick 50 percent or more girls, because girls are strong.

thehaleybird

Report

123points

102