#1
The a few days after our wedding my spouse is standing in the kitchen, whistling and FLIPPING pancakes. I was shocked anyone could actually flip a pancake.
“Morning, babe” and sets out a plate of perfect pancakes. Refused to use store brand syrup…nope we are a “maple syrup” household.
Buttery and not to sweet, and fluffy, beautiful golden brown. A faint cinnamon flavor.
I make a good pancakes, but this was ridiculous. I asked “why haven’t you ever made me pancakes?”
“You never asked for pancakes, I make awesome pancakes. I won a pancake contest once ” was my spouses response.
The only way I forgave this secret is pancakes on the weekends. Watch who you marry.
An: This story is in jest for those that don’t get it. We were long distance for 6 years because of their military deployments and my education. We now have an inside joke where I stand up and yell “pancake liar” and point dramatically. It’s been 12 years of perfect pancakes on the weekends for me.
It can be challenging to understand whether a person is ready to be vulnerable with us, especially if they're sending mixed signals.
So, we asked Dr. Jennifer Litner, a sexologist and founder of Embrace Sexual Wellness—a Chicago-based center for sex therapy and education that accepts clients for both in-person and telehealth appointments—what to watch for.
"Some signs someone may not be ready to open up include avoiding conversations about the future, acting elusive or dodging questions about sharing how they feel, consistently being unavailable or non-responsive, keeping conversations very surface level, and not sharing personal details," she told Bored Panda.
#2
Me, as we started rallying: “WHAT. HOW?”
Her: *shrugs* “you never asked”
Honestly, her humility is pretty sexy.
#3
According to a recent study of 50,000 people, the most common secrets include a lie we've told (69 percent), romantic desire (61 percent), sex (58 percent), and finances (58 percent).
Having a secret about “extra-relational thoughts” (defined as thinking about relations with another person while already in a relationship) is also quite common (50 percent), well ahead of having a secret emotional infidelity (34 percent), or a secret sexual infidelity (21 percent).
#4
#5
My kids: Dad must really love you to listen to music he hates for 20 years!
A smaller survey of 2,000 adults found that more than one-third of respondents have kept a secret from their live-in partners for over a year and a half, while half of the respondents said they still haven’t told their partner their secret.
Millennials were the age group most likely to keep secrets from their significant others, followed by Gen Z, while Baby Boomers were the generation more likely to be truthful with their partners.
According to the study, the most common secrets people have kept from their partners included details about past relationships (26%), doing something they knew their partner would be upset about (20%), and undisclosed spending habits (19%).
#6
#7
The reality was that my father was an excommunicated Mormon, and my mother was an agoraphobic shut in. Both interesting and intelligent people, but not very skilled in the ways of the world, or in raising a child.
They both believed that children were just born the way they are, and so just taught me that I was extraordinary by birth, that most people were uselessly incompetent, and that there was little to do to better yourself. So I was simply cut loose on the world, sent out into the world to just “figure it out.”
Starting at about 6, I just took this unjustified confidence out into the wild and tried not to die. I learned lots of amazing things about nature, and even people, but I never learned all the little details of being a socially acceptable human being.
To simplify my upbringing, and to explain some of my glaring defects, I simply explain to people that I was raised by wolves.
#8
Well. One day we had to move our heavy couch unexpectedly and I found what I called the Toenail Graveyard. He didn't trim his toenails, he tore them off - and APPARENTLY threw them behind the couch. The look on his face.... he was mortified. I was so repulsed, I think I just walked away.
Now that the jig is up, he clips his nails in the bathroom like a normal human, instead of tearing them off and hiding them around the house like some kind of demented feral beast.
For those who want to make a conscious effort to build trust in their relationship, Dr. Jennifer Litner suggested focusing on "being consistent in your communication, doing what you say you're going to do, and continuing to make an effort to create plans and express interest in one another are some ways to build trust early on in a relationship."
#9
'I've been meaning to tell you this for a while, and..well..
I really like country music!'
Like....okay 😂
Nevermind the fact that we had been together for 9 years at that point, I'm not sure why it had to be a secret!
#10
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#12
Every single day of my marriage made so much more sense after reading a few books.
#14
Yes, obviously we talked about it before getting engaged. She had promised me she was going to work full time.
#15
If he had told me this before we were married, we would not be married now. The bastard tricked me.
#16
I guess I didn't know when we got married how devoted she would be. I wouldn't have blamed her for leaving when I got brain damaged.
#17
We worked together before getting married, and one night I brought a big ol’ sandwich and stuck it in the work fridge. I knew I would need the calories because we were pushing some heavy stuff around that came off the freight truck. So I’m working up a sweat, and it’s break time. I open up the work fridge DEVASTATED that somebody ate my sandwich. Who would eat someone else’s food? It’s never happened to me before, we were a pretty small, tight-knit staff. I asked around, and nobody knew anything of course. I finished out my shift, hungry and lethargic. Ended up marrying one of my coworkers that was with me that night. The sandwich dilemma got brought up in conversation TWO YEARS after we got married, and he casually admitted to it. I had a lot of feelings about that, still do. Lol.
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