Every kid grows up differently. Some have it easier, others have to fight tooth and nail for everything they have from the get-go. Those who are lucky and have their parents spoil them find out how harsh life can be only later in life.
This moment comes at different times for different people. Some spoiled kids realize how good they had it once they leave the nest. Others only understand how coveted they were after a certain tragedy. One Redditor was curious to know the experiences of these children. So they asked: “Ex-spoiled kids, what [were] your reality checks?”
#1
I failed out of an rich kid private college and the only place that admitted me was night school at a large public university. For the first time I was surrounded by working class people who were busting their a**es to improve their lives, working one or two jobs while going to school. Changed my perspective. That and a couple girlfriends (one now my wife) who were the first in their family to go to college who kicked the rich kid arrogance out of my sorry a*s.
164points
#2
I had a few reality checks. The first major one was during a Christmas gathering where my nephew received 2 new Playstation consoles and 1 new Xbox console. The idea was to send a Playstation to each parents house as they were separated. His comment was "is that it?" The amount of red that I saw was insane. I was a spoiled brat but I never made a comment quite like that. Made me realize how insufferable it is to be around a spoiled brat.
Second was when my mom had a stroke. Found out she took out a lot of loans in secret to afford a lifestyle facade. I was used to my mom fixing all my problems whether it be monetary or education based. We were told my mom would have 48 hours to live - needless to say I sobered up quickly and got my s**t together.
Nearly 9 years later and both mom and I are doing great!
149points
#3
My parents were super wealthy so all my siblings and I were spoiled. My brother however despised my parents and was super rebellious so he always rejected their help. As soon as he turned 18, he went to university, was able to pay for it himself through scholarships, part time jobs, paid internships and student loans. I remember visiting him during his uni years, asking if he needed money (I was younger than him btw) but he refused any help. His living conditions were absolutely horrible. He would rent a locker on campus, put all his stuff inside and sleep on campus. He constantly looked for free food anywhere and everywhere. That’s when I started to realize how hard life would really be without my parents support. It gave me a new appreciation for my parents but I also started to respect my brother a lot more. Always thought he was just a delinquent lol
121points
A lot of the entries on this list have to do with generational wealth. Some of the stories are about so-called ex-spoiled kids finding out they are richer than their peers. Others are about how the spoiled kids had a wake-up call after losing their parents' financial support.
Coming from a well-off family might not seem like a privilege to the kids, yet it still is. An associate professor of psychology at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro, Gabriela Livas Stein, says it's imperative to teach children about privilege, especially racial privilege.
"When people don't understand or acknowledge that their success is not just a result of hard work but also due to unearned advantages, they then make assumptions about the reasons why others have failed ― like they did not work hard enough or did not try to get out of poverty."
#4
When I mistreated someone I cared about and they actually followed through with cutting me out of their life.
117points
#5
My mom had her own salon and I worked for her. I was a very spoiled, entitled and irresponsible 21 yo. I would party all night, come home at 4am and then go into work 30 min late without telling my mom. I thought I did a better job than everyone. I looked down on my moms employees. I didn’t care about customers and treated them badly. The list of negatives could go on and on.
Anyways my moms brother, my uncle, died unexpectedly. They were extremely close in every way almost like twins. My mom had a complete mental break down and stopped going into work immediately. I had to step in to take care of her business and employees while she took time off to mourn. She ended up taking 4 months off and went on a once in a lifetime all around the world vacation to cope with her grief. I literally had to take on a million responsibilities overnight. In those 4 months I took care of every single aspect of the salon without prior business knowledge. I realized how difficult having a business was and how ignorant I was before.
I got my c**p together real quick to save my family’s business and keep it afloat while my mom was gone. I really grew up from that experience and I’m glad I went through it. I never once took my mom, her business, customers, income or people in general for granted ever again
117points
#6
I always thought that if people actually tried to live frugally they wouldn't complain. Now I realize that even if you're single, have a tiny apartment with roommates, an old clunker, eat rice and beans, etc: you can barely make enough to live, much less set aside money to hopefully own a home one day without Mom and Dad's help. Actually crazy how much life costs and how little we make.
109points
Experts say it's important to teach kids how to practice gratitude. That means embracing what you have and thinking before wanting more, mostly in the context of material things. In his book Freedom of Simplicity, Richard Foster writes about how we, in the contemporary world, always strive for something bigger and better.
"We grasp and grab and never have enough. And most destructive of all, our flashy cars, and sports spectaculars, and backyard pools have a way of crowding out much interest in civil rights, or inner-city poverty, or the starved masses of India. Greed has a way of severing the cords of compassion."
Experts say that we have to teach our kids that we have enough in our everyday lives. Maybe we don't need more toys, more jewelry, and the newest iPhone. Teach kids to prioritize experiences like going to the Zoo and family trips over material things, parenting experts say.
#7
Father died and gave his inheritance to his 25 yo gf
94points
#8
Having a disabled child. I was an only child with a supportive dad and stay at home mom and I had a great childhood with very few responsibilities. When my first child was diagnosed with multiple lifelong disabilities I knew I had to grow up and put her first and be her advocate. It has made me a better person for sure.
94points
#9
Once my roommate moved in I realize how privileged I was. She does not have a good relationship with her parents, so they don’t help her with anything, I on the other hand, have a very good relationship with mine. they help me with absolutely everything. I sat down and explained my finances to her and casually told her about how my mom pays for my car bill and my car insurance and how if I’m ever short on money, I can easily just text my parents and ask them for it, she stared at me like I came from another planet. I didn’t realize until then it wasn’t like that for everybody else. Ever since then I’ve taken steps to take more accountability with my own finances, I stopped shopping as much as I used to, and definitely second-guess going out for the night needlessly. Seeing how hard she struggles when I’m pretty much doing just fine really opened my eyes on how hard it actually is out here. So for now I pay all the bills when they’re due and she pays me her half when it works financially for her and although I’m still spoiled in many ways I’ve managed to find a way to make it work for her and I in our favor. Bills due now but you won’t have the money till next week? Okay, I’ll call my parents and they’ll pay it and when she has the money I just give the money to my parents to pay them back. You can be spoiled and still find a find a way to share the privilege if you care enough.
84points
Another important thing is to make sure the kids grow up to be responsible. That means teaching a child that if they want something, they have to work for it. That doesn't mean that parents should pay children for doing chores. Not everything in this world is material. "To be a functioning part of society, you have to contribute," Today's Parent writes.
#10
My family was middle class but treated me like they always had plenty of funds. When I heard that they took $ out of their retirement savings so I could go to private university, I turned in my transfer notice and came back to an in-state college and picked up a job as well.
External-Egg-8094:
Yea sounds like they knew they raised them right and it was a worthy investment. I think some need to differentiate spoiled vs privileged.
Yea sounds like they knew they raised them right and it was a worthy investment. I think some need to differentiate spoiled vs privileged.
83points
#11
I am the second child who got everything he wanted. My sister was the one to compromise everything for me. I wanted new phone, i got it. I wanted a new computer, i got that too. Basically everything i wanted i got it. While my sister was still using her old stuff. Now comes the part where at some point i realized this is wrong. When i go over memories of me getting the stuff i wanted my sisters eyes pop up, and they look sad man.. I ruined her childhood. I just wanna roll into a ball and cry.. not for me but for her. I was a horrible brother we fought a lot and everything had to go my way. We are grown ups now and every now and then when i look at her i feel shame. She has a beautiful family and is doing financially light years better than me. I'm so happy that she's getting everything she wants but i know i will never get rid of the shame of what a spoiled kid i was..
71points
#12
Got to college and I was genuinely pretty shocked that everyone else didn’t have month long vacations in the south of France eating in Michelin star restaurants etc. Must have seemed like a real d**k to quite a few people.
69points
#13
At the age of 13 I went from living in a mansion to sleeping in a car because it turns out my dad had committed many white collar crimes and our bank accounts were frozen & assets seized.
61points
#14
I was late to the game when it came to applying for colleges my senior year of high school, so when I accepted to go to a school 8 hours away from my hometown, I had missed the deadline to apply for a dorm or nearby apartment. I ended up living in a house four miles away from campus with no car, and with the nearest bus stop being a 30 minute walk through tall grass next to a busy street with no sidewalks. I missed my bus the very first day of class and started sobbing. I called my mom and she empathized, but there was nothing she could do. That was the day I realized I had to start figuring things out on own and life would no longer be easy.
58points
#15
When I was complaining to a college classmate about how my laptop battery wouldn’t last for a whole class and I was really hoping for a new one from my parents for Christmas. I then learned her parents were homeless and she was just hoping by Christmas they’d have a roof over their heads. Big wake up call. We remain friends to this day.
NoFaithlessness7327:
My friend who's unaware that he's rich thinks that his laptop is terribly outdated after a year so he wants to constantly have a new one yearly.
My friend who's unaware that he's rich thinks that his laptop is terribly outdated after a year so he wants to constantly have a new one yearly.
58points
#16
When my parents got divorced because my dad decided that drugs and hookers were more important than his family.
All my friends from my private school stopped talking to me because I was no longer 'one of them'.
And I had to transfer to a public school. I pretended it was because I wanted to be in a co-ed environment and try out for cheerleader, but the reality was, we couldn't afford it any more.
My horse was sold.
Then the IRS came after my family for back taxes and took my mother's bank account, our house and sold our belongings - including my white princess canopy bed.
And to top it off - we had to move into the 'projects' after that.
And I had to transfer to a public school. I pretended it was because I wanted to be in a co-ed environment and try out for cheerleader, but the reality was, we couldn't afford it any more.
My horse was sold.
Then the IRS came after my family for back taxes and took my mother's bank account, our house and sold our belongings - including my white princess canopy bed.
And to top it off - we had to move into the 'projects' after that.
This was in the 70s.
58points
#17
I wasn’t spoiled, my parents provided a very average middle class upbringing, but being from the SF Bay Area, the value of the house my parents had bought in the 1970s had skyrocketed over time.
After watching Fresh Prince of Bel Air one day, I ran downstairs to my dad who was sitting on the ground, sweating from hours of pulling weeds from his garden and said, “Dad, you should become a millionaire so we can have a butler!”
And he just looked at me and said, “Goosfrabbah, I am a millionaire…” And just went back to weeding.
That one will always stick with me
57points
#18
Doing habitat for humanity like trips to West Virginia and Nicaragua. Seeing other people’s homes in disrepair and then building a personal relationship with the home owners hits differently. These people were just born into their situation just like I was born into mine. It made me appreciate the stuff I have more
56points
#19
There were a few small things that helped me realise I had it pretty good.
Learning that people waited until the last possible moment to turn the heating on, and not just having it come on automatically when it was cold.
Realising there were people who had to share rooms with their siblings.
My friend being shocked that my fridge had an ice dispenser and 2 doors.
55points
#20
I was "spoiled" in the sense that I was infantilized. I didn't move out until I was 23. Having to keep up with all my own stuff, including life skills I was never taught, was a smack in the face.
51points