The ancient Vikings sincerely believed that the personality of a warrior is determined not only by the feats that he performed, but also by his reputation, by the way others relate to his deeds. About a thousand years have passed since then, but there are still people who fully share these outdated Viking beliefs. Yes, teenagers.
If you collected a selection of deeds committed by teenagers just out of desire to 'look cool', you'd probably get a whole thick book. And this story from the user u/NoLeg2760 would definitely claim a proud place in this book.
The author of the post has a 15 Y.O. son whom they recently gifted a new iPhone instead of his old one
Image credits: LinkedIn Sales Navigator (not the actual photo)
However, the boy came home with a broken phone soon after and demanded a new one
Image credits: u/NoLeg2760
It turned out that the boy had been dared by his friend and simply broke the phone himself 'to look cool'
Image credits: Towfiqu barbhuiya (not the actual photo)
Image credits: u/NoLeg2760
The parent flatly refused to buy a new phone, despite having the financial opportunity to do so
Image credits: Shahbano Khushi (not the actual photo)
Image credits: u/NoLeg2760
Instead, they found their old flip phone and handed it to their upset offspring
So, the Original Poster (OP) is a parent of a 15 Y.O. son, who received a gift for good school performance - a brand new iPhone SE 2020 (the events unfolded about two years ago, when this model was definitely a bestseller). Considering that the boy's previous phone was an iPhone 5s, this is definitely a good upgrade, you must agree!
What came to the parent's surprise was when, after some time, the son came to them with a completely broken phone, which looked like it had been first thrown onto the sidewalk, and then run over several times with a bike. And imagine the parent's indignation when the son sincerely confessed this was exactly what happened to the phone. What's more, he did it himself!
To the logical question "What the hell?" or something like that, the teenager replied that he had been dared by his friend, and that he wanted so much to "look cool". And the last straw in this conversation was the son's demand to urgently buy him a new iPhone - after all, walking around with a broken one is even less cool, isn't it?
The original poster honestly admits that they could afford to buy one more new phone, but felt that this would be somehow wrong. The veteran iPhone 5s, as it turned out after a thorough examination, had peacefully passed away, so the OP went to the cabinet, after a long excavation found their old flip phone abandoned there, probably before the son's birth, and proudly handed it to their offspring. Just take it and don't deny yourself anything!
Of course, the son was upset and livid - after all, walking around with an old "dialer" means lowering the level of your 'coolness' somewhere to the level of the sidewalk, but the parent was adamant. Actually, according to the author, 'it performs the basic actions you need a phone for. The rest is optional, and he chose looking cool over having that.'
Image credits: Jesus Rodriguez (not the actual photo)
The main reason, of course, is adolescence, especially since all of us who have already ceased to be teenagers have gone through this. "Teenagers are naturally wired to trust the judgment of their same-age peers over that of an adult. This is no doubt why, when your teen does foolish things, he often appears to be completely unreceptive to common sense - unless it comes from the mouth of a friend," Dr. Tali Shenfield, C.Psych., writes in her dedicated article on Psy-Ed.
"Once again, this behavior isn't the product of intentional defiance. According to fMRI imaging, the parts of the brain that process social information are highly active when teens are in the presence of peers, and comparatively under-active in the presence of adults. In other words, it's not that your child doesn't care how you feel when he worries you; his brain is just set to prioritize peer feedback, sometimes to the exclusion of all else," Dr. Shenfield concludes.
Be that as it may, people in the comments to the original post were not inclined to go into the specifics of teenage psychology, believing that if the boy broke the phone on his own initiative, then this is a problem for anyone but his parent. "It was no accident, he chose to do it for cool points. Choices have consequences," one of the commenters is sincerely convinced.
I honestly reviewed several dozen of the most popular comments on the original post, but not one of them contained an iota of condemnation of the parent's behavior, and this is probably correct. After all, they didn’t leave their offspring without a phone at all, and flip phones are now back in trend. Of course, slightly more modern flip phones, but these are just details... "He's lucky you didn't give him an old Nokia with a snake on it," one of the peeps in the comments wittily noted. So what do you think, is his parent's decision overly harsh, or not?
People in the comments unanimously sided with the author, claiming that they're a good parent and did everything right
