The author of the post started out by sharing that she ended things with a man because he ordered a small beverage. That sounds like a pretty small reason, right? But the thread quickly went viral and received support from a number of Twitter users. On a mission to find out more about breakups and how should we deal with them, Bored Panda reached out to Kate Mansfield, a dating and relationship coach, for a quick chat.
Usually, ending a relationship is not easy and most of us have at least one memorable breakup story to share. When asked why do such experiences stick with us for a long time, the award-winning coach said that "breaking up with someone that we love is always really painful, even if we know it's for the best".
"Often, we are blocked to new love by a painful memory that sticks inside, long after the event. It can be cleared and we can move on, we have to acknowledge it and bring it to consciousness," Kate explained.
"Nobody likes to feel rejection. It wounds us deeply, but remember that rejection can be a gift! The one thing worse than being rejected is living with a relationship where you are not loved, that is daily rejection and hurts even more."
You may think that splitting up with someone over small details could be considered a quality of the millennials or younger generations. However, Kate rejects the idea that it is more common for them to end relationships over little things. "It is just more obvious because it is posted on social media and documented".
It seems that one of the reasons why young people tend to be more fickle and leave for silly reasons is simply because they lack maturity. And that's normal. "The problem is when older people fail to grow up, and carry these patterns into later life. This can be prevalent online and I help my clients to spot these people to avoid wasting time," the dating coach explained.
It's no surprise that breakups fill our heads with confusion and we're not sure how to move on with our lives. Everyone feels differently, some try to keep themselves busy, others lie in the bed and curl up with a bucket of ice cream. As Kate stated, it all depends on various things such as age, how long the relationship lasted and how well you were matched.
"I suggest to be grateful if someone shows these kinds of behaviors early on, and I would see this as a huge red flag. Leave. Or, if they break up with you, be glad. This person is immature and unavailable. Move on and find someone like-minded who can love you in a real way for who you really are," the founder of "The Dating Diet" shared how to deal with such breakups.
Kate noted that today's dating landscape can feel overwhelming and very challenging, especially if you are sensitive, have been hurt in the past, or feel insecure. "Don't lose hope! There are huge opportunities to meet an amazing partner these days, especially online."
A study by Pew Research Center confirms that dating is only getting harder and harder. It shows that for nearly half of U.S. adults, dating has gotten more difficult over the last 10 years. According to the survey, women are more likely than men to have negative experiences. "Most women who are currently single and looking to date (65%) say they have experienced at least one of six harassing behaviors asked about in the survey from someone they were dating or had been on a date with," the researchers explained.
Among those who are on the dating market, most say they are dissatisfied with their dating lives and that it has been difficult to find people to date. At the top of the list of relationship deal breakers, you can find long-distance, debt, and... voting for Donald Trump. And that's completely normal. We should be able to end things with people we do not enjoy spending time with, even for the most ridiculous reasons.
