Legend has it that there are people who go to bed every night at sensible hours and fall asleep within the first 10 minutes, in a comfortable position and with the intent to sleep for the next seven to eight hours.
The majority of us, however, operate in two general modes. We either fall asleep at every possible opportunity if we are given more than five minutes of inactivity (much like a computer). In this case, the convenience of the sleeping position has very little relevance. The other alternative is that you won’t fall asleep, no matter how tired you are or how comfortable your bed is. You will lie in bed for hours, counting not only sheep but every farm animal you can remember, unfortunately, to no avail.
Believe it or not, both conditions are caused by lack of sleep and incorrect schedules. And no, this is no joking matter because it can seriously affect your health, so you should really consult a specialist if you recognized yourself in the previous paragraph.
Yet, some sleep puns and good night jokes can still be a nice first step to deal with the anxiety around sleep. If you have trouble sleeping, funny stories and jokes about sleeping may be a good way to relax until you finally fall asleep. And not surprisingly, sleep jokes are often told together with coffee jokes and coffee puns.
Whatever time it is in your part of the world right now, we wish you a good night’s sleep when you decide to go to bed. And if you have any fun sleep-related stories, share them in the comments.
#1
I finally got eight hours of sleep. It took me three days, but whatever.
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#2
My boss calls me 'the computer', not because of my calculation skills but because I go to sleep when left unattended for 15 minutes.
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#3
Insomnia is terrible. But on the plus side... Only three more sleeps till Christmas.
unknown
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#4
What do you call it when a kid is fighting going to sleep?
Resisting a rest.
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#5
My little cousin was showing off that he sleeps in a race car bed.
Jokes on him, I sleep in a real car.
unknown
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#6
I like to sleep with a bedside lamp on. My boyfriend says it’s weird.
I don’t know why, it makes a great hat.
unknown
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#7
How do you confirm that you have insomnia? You know that the farmer has 901 sheep.
unknown
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#8
Someone stole hundreds of cans of energy drinks from our local store.
I don’t know how they can sleep at night.
unknown
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#9
Do you think Jeff Bezos sleeps naked? Or with pajamazon?
unknown
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#10
I sleep with a knife under my pillow. You never know when someone is going to break in and give you a cake.
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16points
#11
You know you’re getting older when happy hour is a nap.
unknown
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#12
Why do keyboards never sleep?
Because they have two shifts.
unknown
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#13
Why did mom always tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
She didn’t want to wake up the sleeping pills.
unknown
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#14
Why is insomnia not a joke?
Because people are losing sleep over it.
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#15
What do you call making up for lost sleep?
Melatonement.
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#16
Learning to sleep upside down is often hard for baby bats.
But they soon get the hang of it.
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#17
If there is a king and queen-size mattress, where does the prince sleep?
On the heir mattress.
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#18
The urge to sing “The Lion Sleeps Tonight” is just a whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away.
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#19
The patient said to the anesthesiologist, “Can I put myself to sleep?”
Anesthesiologist: “Knock yourself out!”
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#20
Do you know at what time tennis players go to sleep?
At ten-nish.
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