The story of many outstanding people in big business, even truly self-made ones, often begins with a certain boost from their parents. Even the most talented entrepreneurs sometimes had at least influential relatives behind them. So they always had some kind of a "backup route."
The narrator of our story today, the user u/Previous_Ganache8477, was lucky enough to find a decent and fairly well-paid job, despite losing his parents at a relatively young age. Our hero always helped his younger sister - until he realized recently she seemed to be misusing this help. However, let's not get ahead of ourselves.
More info: Reddit
Sometimes, as we all know, the road to hell is actually paved with the best intentions, and here's more proof of this fact
Image credits: ldutko / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author of the post is a quite well-earning man, and he often helps his younger sister financially
Image credits: wavebreakmedia_micro / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Recently, the man found out that his sister started asking for more money from him, and then he found out the reason
Image credits: prostooleh / Freepik (not the actual photo)
It turned out the woman is now dating a guy who's unemployed and prefers to live off his new girlfriend
Image credits: Previous_Ganache8477
The brother decided to cut off the sis financially, and she snapped at him, accusing him of attempting to "control her life"
The Original poster (OP) says he is 30 years old, he earns well, and makes about four times more than his 23-year-old sister, who works as a cashier. Since their parents have been gone, our hero has felt responsible for his younger sis and still keeps helping her. He pays half of her rent, as well as the utilities, and sometimes gives her money for various purchases.
Recently, about a month ago, the man noticed that his sister had been asking him for money more often (and more money overall), but he didn't refuse her. However, it later turned out that she had been living with a new boyfriend, "Jake," for about a month. Moreover, some mutual acquaintances said that this Jake had been unemployed for a long time.
Thus, our hero discovered that he was essentially financing Jake's expenses. From a conversation with his sister, the man learned that Jake just preferred to stay at home while she went to work. The OP, not wanting to finance some random guy, simply reduced his sister's allowance for the following month. When she protested, he replied that she now had a roommate who could share the expenses.
Now the sister has accused the author of allegedly trying to control her personal life. The original poster, however, just doesn't feel he should be helping an adult stranger in any way. So, now he's torn on whether it's okay to cut his sister off financially.
Image credits: drobotdean / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Experts note that financial help and support are truly needed more than ever in today's world. For example, according to the results of this survey by Creditcards.com, 45% of parents nowadays try to help their adult children, and 79% opened up about sharing money they would've used for their own personal finances.
So, the hero of our story can afford financial support for his sister, and he has indeed been acting as a parental figure for her for many years - but how critical is his help to her? Is it really that she can't live without it now? Or is it more about enabling her poor financial choices?
"If they know they can turn to you for a loan, they will never learn to save or live within their means," says J. Douglas Hoyes, Licensed Insolvency Trustee, in the dedicated podcast episode published on his official website. In other words, if you don't let your relative "navigate the financial seas freely," they may never learn to swim...
Most people in the comments also wondered why the original poster was still providing financial support - after all, his sister is now an adult who works, rents an apartment, and needs to learn to take responsibility for all of her decisions, both personal and financial.
"Stop asking for money and take responsibility for yourself," this was probably the wisest advice one of the responders gave to the original poster's sister. So what do you, our dear readers, think of this story? Is the author right in his decision to cut his sister off financially? Please feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below.
Most commenters claimed that the author was 100% right in his decision, so they just urged him to stop any financial help for his sister at all
