37 Signs Someone Is Trying To Look Way Cooler Than They Actually Are

We got an interview with Dr. Gleb Tsipursky, and he explained how to spot someone pretending to be tough: "The telltale signs of someone pretending to be [cool] when they're not, typically include overcompensation, excessive boasting, and a constant need for validation. These behaviors can be driven by cognitive biases such as the optimism bias and the halo effect. The optimism bias leads people to believe that they are better or more skilled than they actually are, while the halo effect causes them to overemphasize positive traits in themselves or others, creating a distorted self-image."

Dr. Gleb Tsipursky also explained why people do it: "People often pretend to be tough due to feelings of insecurity, which may stem from a desire to fit in or to establish dominance in social situations. The horns effect, a cognitive bias where we tend to see negative traits in a person and ignore their positive attributes, can contribute to this behavior. If someone feels they are perceived as weak, they may overcompensate by pretending to be tough in order to counterbalance that perception. In other cases, they might be influenced by the empathy gap, a bias where people underestimate the power of emotional states in their decision-making process. When people feel insecure or anxious, they may misjudge their emotional response and engage in exaggerated displays of toughness to protect themselves from perceived threats."

Dr. Gleb Tsipursky shared if he'd ever witnessed someone pretending to be tougher than they were: "While I cannot personally attest to pretending to be tough, I have certainly observed this behavior in others. As an expert in cognitive biases, I've seen people project a tough exterior to mask their insecurities or to fit into certain social environments. Sometimes, these performances can be quite convincing, but they often unravel when the individual is faced with a situation that tests their mettle."

Dr. Gleb Tsipursky also shared that most people put on this tough facade: "I believe that many people do indeed pretend to be tougher than they are, often due to the influence of cognitive biases such as loss aversion and the status quo bias. Loss aversion makes people more sensitive to the prospect of loss than the potential for gain, so they may act tough to avoid being seen as weak or vulnerable. Similarly, the status quo bias leads people to prefer the familiar, so they may maintain a facade of toughness to keep up appearances and not risk disrupting their social standing."