“Don’t judge a book by its cover” is one of the first life lessons we learn as children. For the most part, it’s about looking past seemingly unappealing superficial traits to know the real person beneath them.
The saying can also work the other way around. Sometimes, we need to be wary of the overly pleasant person who may actually be hiding something sinister from within.
This was a topic of discussion in a recent Threads post, where people discussed the telltale signs of a covertly dangerous person masking themselves behind niceness. If you have trouble reading people, you may learn a thing or two just by scrolling through.
#1
One of the biggest giveaways is when their kindness is conditional. They seem generous and respectful only as long as they get admiration, attention, or obedience. The moment they’re told “no,” criticized, or rejected, they become manipulative, guilt-tripping, angry, or quietly vindictive. Genuine kindness doesn’t disappear when expectations aren’t met
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23points
#2
They always see themselves as the victim, family, love, friendship. Like really pity trap you
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23points
#3
When they weaponize personal things you shared when they pretended to be caring and curious.
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22points
#5
If they try to make you feel guilty for setting a boundary.
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20points
#6
When they treat someone badly who they perceive as less powerful/important than them, e.g. waitstaff, skycap, usher, janitor, etc. Dead giveaway.
20points
#7
Always describe their exes as the problem and the psycho, no accountability.
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17points
#10
When the answer of "no" on anything for any reason is taken as a prompt to try a different strategy rather than to stop.
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15points
#11
Mimicking and mirroring your every move but so well you feel your a match.
14points
#12
When they infantilize you! Run! It’s a supremacist jerk!
14points
#13
They lead with talking about how different and misunderstood they are
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14points
#14
Lack of accountability for even the smallest error. Run.
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13points
#15
He wants to know all the ways you’ve been “hurt” in your life.
It sounds empathetic.. but hes not…he’s studying his prey.
It sounds empathetic.. but hes not…he’s studying his prey.
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13points
#16
When everything in their life that fell apart has an explanation that absolves them of any and all fault.
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13points
#18
When they say they want their woman to be submissive and feminine
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12points
#20
I think one of the biggest tells is whether their kindness can survive a loss of control. I’ve seen people that seem extraordinarily nice as long as everyone around them is behaving in ways that keep them comfortable. You can learn a lot by watching who they become when they don’t get to control the outcome.
10points