Some secrets are complicated enough that no one in their right mind would really feel it’s worthwhile to share. That being said, there is something cathartic about being able to get things off your chest, even if it’s not to anyone who is actually affected.
A netizen asked “What secrets do you have that you would take to the grave with you, but would be willing to share anonymously?” and people shared their examples. Get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and, if you are brave enough, share your own examples in the comments down below.
#1
There’s part of me that’s always felt so guilty about this, but the other part of me thinks that I did the right thing. When my mother-in-law was in hospice, we had gotten the call that her last rights were being read to her and we should come because it was very close. The family gathered in her room, my father in law (her husband of 42 years) had been by her side and hadn’t left for days. We were there for hours, my sister in laws had to take there kids home at some point, so they had left and it was just my husband, me, and my FIL left. The nurses were saying that they might have spoken to soon because she was still hanging on, it was awful to watch. My FIL looked ragged and tired and he said he was just going to go to the other floor for a cup of coffee, my husband went with him. I said I would call if something changed but he was only going to be gone for 15 minutes maybe. About 5 minutes after they left my MIL really started to have very labored breathing, I called the nurse to see what was happening and by the time she came to the room (maybe 2 minutes) she had past. I asked the nurse to wait for me to get my FIL and husband back to the room to pronounce her unalive. They rushed back and my FIL held her and after a minute the nurse and doctor pronounced. My FIL believes he made it back to the room and was holding her while she left this life, I have never told him or my husband. Only me and that sweet nurse know she was already gone. I have debated telling my husband this but he’s always said he was comforted by watching his dad hold his mom when she passed away. I know I will never tell my FIL this, when he talks about her he always mentions how he was there for that moment and I don’t want to take that away from him. It would crush him. Part of me thinks she waited for everyone to leave the room so they didn’t have to actually see her go, she was always worried about everybody else. I’ve never told anyone.
19points
#2
I have a rare disease that will leave me blind. This isn’t a run of the mill I was born blind or in one day I will lose all my eyesight. My disease will slowly degrade away where I would walk down the street thinking I see something but then I run into a pole because I didn’t see it. It gets embarrassing trying to hide that I am almost completely blind to everyone one I know. Another part of the disease is that I am deaf. I was born completely deaf and never heard sound.
This isn’t what I am taking to the grave with me. My secret is that I have been planning on going to the Netherlands and euthanizing myself when I lose most of my vision and can’t stand not being able to see. When you can’t hear and you lose your sight you pretty much become a burden to society and can’t do anything.
This isn’t what I am taking to the grave with me. My secret is that I have been planning on going to the Netherlands and euthanizing myself when I lose most of my vision and can’t stand not being able to see. When you can’t hear and you lose your sight you pretty much become a burden to society and can’t do anything.
19points
#3
I love to sing. It's so bad that I won't even subject my husband or kids to it, but I'll sing my heart out on my long commute to and from work.
17points
If you happen to have something on your chest that you can’t quite share, here is a number that might make you feel a little less alone. Researchers at Columbia Business School surveyed people about what they keep to themselves and found that the average person is holding on to 13 secrets, five of which had never been told to a soul before the survey came along. That is one crowded mental attic.
According to a research digest from the British Psychological Society, the real trouble is not the awkward moments when you have to hide something from a friend or coworker. It is the quiet moments in between, when your mind drifts back to the secret again and again. In the studies it covers, people thought about their secrets far more often than they had to conceal them, and those frequent mental visits lined up with lower life satisfaction.
#4
I laugh at all my dads jokes because he finds them so funny. I never understand the jokes or ever think they’re funny, its because he’s from a different generation and an immigrant so his jokes are just from a different place. I’ll fake laugh at a 1000 jokes until the muscles on my face go limp if it makes that man happy.
16points
#5
The only "secret" I have is that my dad inherited millions in the last year from his parents and began transferring my sibling and I some pretty hefty funds. Before this, we were already super savers and very financially witty. Now, although I'll still say to friends "oh I've gotta save money, let me check if I can swing it", I secretly know that I'm set for life and can afford almost anything reasonable (week trips, material items, etc). Gun to my head, nobody in my circle will ever know.
14points
#6
My mom still thinks that my dad didn’t gave her permission to take me out of the country to live with her, because he wanted to keep me
Truth is, I told my dad I wanted to stay with him. I didn’t want to live with her because I was scared of her (had/still has a little of a bad temper).
Truth is, I told my dad I wanted to stay with him. I didn’t want to live with her because I was scared of her (had/still has a little of a bad temper).
14points
Other research even found that people preoccupied with a secret act as if they are hauling around extra physical weight, which is a rather dramatic way for the brain to say it needs a break. So why does typing it out for strangers feel so good? A big part of the answer is anonymity. Psychologist John Suler, who wrote the classic paper on the online disinhibition effect, explains that people open up more online because they feel less vulnerable when their words cannot be linked to the rest of their lives.
#7
There a only 2 people and 3 dogs keeping me here. When they are gone I will go too.
13points
#8
During my sister’s first marriage I knew that she and her husband at the time were having problems because when I was at their home I saw that my sister was “keeping score” on the wall calendar: of events he’d missed or times he’d been late. She’d write a snarky comment on the date. I said nothing because she wasn’t talking to me about it but they eventually divorced.
Her second marriage is to a wonderful man, an architect. In their second year of marriage he took on a client that had him working long irregular hours and my sister was frustrated because he was never home and was missing family activities. I was over there for dinner one night and her husband was late again. My sister scrawled “late for dinner AGAIN!” on the calendar date and marched upstairs. I felt she was being irrational because her new husband was a great guy so I interfered for the first and only time ever in her adult life: I added “littlefoot352 was” in front of the “late for dinner AGAIN!” on the calendar.
When her husband came home I was sitting in the dining room by myself. I saw him look at the calendar, look at me, sigh and the take the pen and scribble it out completely and quickly. Then after saying hello he called my sister downstairs and presented her with the plans he’d drawn up for her dream kitchen. The project he’d been kdoing so hard was so that he could afford the remodel...for her.
My sister later told me how overwhelmed she was that he forgave her for writing that comment in a fit of anger. She’ll never do it again.
Her second marriage is to a wonderful man, an architect. In their second year of marriage he took on a client that had him working long irregular hours and my sister was frustrated because he was never home and was missing family activities. I was over there for dinner one night and her husband was late again. My sister scrawled “late for dinner AGAIN!” on the calendar date and marched upstairs. I felt she was being irrational because her new husband was a great guy so I interfered for the first and only time ever in her adult life: I added “littlefoot352 was” in front of the “late for dinner AGAIN!” on the calendar.
When her husband came home I was sitting in the dining room by myself. I saw him look at the calendar, look at me, sigh and the take the pen and scribble it out completely and quickly. Then after saying hello he called my sister downstairs and presented her with the plans he’d drawn up for her dream kitchen. The project he’d been kdoing so hard was so that he could afford the remodel...for her.
My sister later told me how overwhelmed she was that he forgave her for writing that comment in a fit of anger. She’ll never do it again.
12points
#9
I threw 10 packs of dandelion seeds and 10 bamboo in someone’s yard that made me mad. They were annoying people.
11points
He also describes a gentler flavor of the effect, where people share honestly and without hostility, perhaps to find support or a little closeness. Think about what a confession usually costs in real life. Tell a friend and you risk a changed look across the table. Tell a relative and you might hear about it at every holiday gathering until the end of time.
#10
Went to my kid’s cross country meet with wife and kids one Saturday morning. It was my first time at this event, tons of participants, and very few restrooms..(like 800+ participants + spectators and only ONE men’s room). Well the line for the restroom is out the door and my stomach was gurgling. Bad.
I told my wife i forgot something in the minivan so I went back. Fortunately there was a mason jar my wife planned on using for some art project. I put the seat down as best i could, squatted, and filled up the jar with the most fouling smelling feces you can imagine. I was parked along an area with some brush and trees so I left the jar there.
My big fear now is that the jar is still there (a few years later), somebody commits a horrendous crime, police sweep the area and find my DNA there.
I told my wife i forgot something in the minivan so I went back. Fortunately there was a mason jar my wife planned on using for some art project. I put the seat down as best i could, squatted, and filled up the jar with the most fouling smelling feces you can imagine. I was parked along an area with some brush and trees so I left the jar there.
My big fear now is that the jar is still there (a few years later), somebody commits a horrendous crime, police sweep the area and find my DNA there.
11points
#11
My mother told me, and only me, about the fact that my dad cheated on her years ago. He traveled for his job and one day a letter came addressed to him that was mangled. My mother would never open mail or pry, but this letter started with "Dearest love" - she could only see it because the mail sorter had ripped it.
I don't know the full details, as my mom did not share them all. I don't know why she decided to tell me and not my other 4 siblings. She said she decided to stay with dad because she had 5 children and didn't think she could make it alone. She loves him still at age 83, but did also say about 20 years ago that she should never have stayed with him and should have left him after the first baby. I love both my parents and my family, so I will never share this. It will go to her grave with her as she probably no longer remembers it - lost to dementia as are so many of her memories. Dad takes care of her to the best of his ability and they still live together. Mom still has her house she loves.
I don't know the full details, as my mom did not share them all. I don't know why she decided to tell me and not my other 4 siblings. She said she decided to stay with dad because she had 5 children and didn't think she could make it alone. She loves him still at age 83, but did also say about 20 years ago that she should never have stayed with him and should have left him after the first baby. I love both my parents and my family, so I will never share this. It will go to her grave with her as she probably no longer remembers it - lost to dementia as are so many of her memories. Dad takes care of her to the best of his ability and they still live together. Mom still has her house she loves.
9points
#12
I purposly farted in front of the president when I met him. I know he smelled it. I could see it in his eyes. We shook hands and haven't spoken since.
8points
Tell strangers on the internet and the most likely response is a shrug, a kind word, or a reply admitting something equally wild. There is no awkward silence, no follow up call, and no need to manage anyone’s feelings. You post it, you close the tab, and the secret now lives somewhere other than your head.
#13
I'm a pretty good singer. My little sisters have been making me sing them lullabies and whatnot to sleep for years, and when we're alone they force me to do karaoke with them. Other than the five people who read this, only they know that I sing.
8points
#14
I saw my father in law kiss another woman behind his dental practice. It was years ago and I’ve never seen any indication that he has done it again. But I have never told anyone. I’ve never been able to justify sharing it and I don’t even think my mother in law would believe me if I said anything. Historically, she is not a fan of me.
Anyway; now you know.
Anyway; now you know.
8points
#15
When I was 30, I was in a relationship with a man I would marry two years later. We intentionally got pregnant. About a month into the pregnancy, I decided I did not want to have children. I went and got an abortion and told him I miscarried. We were married for 13 years and have been divorced for 16 but are still friends. I never told him the truth
8points
None of this is new, by the way. In 2004, a man named Frank Warren invited strangers to mail him a secret on a homemade postcard as a community art project. CBS News reports that more than a million postcards have since landed in his mailbox, and he has spent years talking about the power of releasing a secret. He has also said that he started recognizing his own secrets in the cards sent by strangers. Nobody needed an audience that knew their names. They needed somewhere to put the thing down.
#16
My mother only told me when I was an adult, that I had an older half-brother who was given up for adoption.
I grew up with the identity of being the eldest sibling, and she asked me not to tell my other siblings. We had a very stable and loving childhood, but it’s odd to view things through that lens and wonder who this person is. I now carry that weight (guilt?), because I’m torn between honoring her wish, and feeling like I’m deceiving my own siblings. What would you do?
I grew up with the identity of being the eldest sibling, and she asked me not to tell my other siblings. We had a very stable and loving childhood, but it’s odd to view things through that lens and wonder who this person is. I now carry that weight (guilt?), because I’m torn between honoring her wish, and feeling like I’m deceiving my own siblings. What would you do?
7points
#17
I will never tell anybody in real life what I actually think or what I actually feel because then they would be sad and worried and I don’t want that for them.
7points
#18
I might be bi or gay I don't really know which is which I'm still confused. I had a girlfriend before but after we broke up, my heart got really broken and since then I like the same gender more. I haven't tried any dates or any relationships with the same gender. Because my dream is to have my own kids. I'm also scared that my family will be disappointed in me. I'm basically faking everything about me.
6points
#19
When I was a kid I once poured out the apple juice out of carton and replaced it with orange juice.
6points
#20
I made a twitter account badmouthing everyone in my classroom and a few people suspected it was me but I got away with it and no one knows who it actually was.
6points
