30 People Reveal Their “Dirty Lil Secrets” They Will Probably Never Say Out Loud

I’d only just begun paying off a vehicle loan in mid 1999. My January payment was returned with the bank saying it was paid off. Not even close. Thanks Y2K.

I’m not that good at IT, I can google like no other.

I came clean a few years ago. But in the 4th and 5th grade I had an obsession with sharp things like knives and razors and would bring them to school. One day our teacher was reading a book and I was messing with the razor behind my back and cut the overhead projectors cord and flipped the breakers for the room. They could tell I cut it but never found the razor blade I hid.

20 years later I find my teacher on FB who still teaches at the same school. I fessed up and told him where he might find the razor blade in the classroom. Sure enough all these years later he found the blade with a hole burned in it from the shock. He decided to keep it as a souvenir from his very first year teaching.

When I was about 8 i was in a supermarket with my mum and she had to use the bathroom. I was sat on the bench outside waiting and there was one of those “press to break glass” fire alarms on the wall. I wanted to know how hard you had to press it… not very hard as it turns out.

The whole store had to leave their shopping and go outside, well over 100 people. Not sure what happened after that because we just went home.

It’s been 20 years and I’ve still never told anyone.

Cheated on my CV to add some skills and certificates I don’t have to match a Google position… but after 5 years I mastered all of them and became a team manager ..

Still a black hole I still can’t get through

5yr old me ruined my parents marriage. I distinctly remember finding what I now know is a condom(unused) in our old station wagon. Me not knowing any better began playing with it. Got done tossed it in the trash. Fast forward a short time later. My father returns home and begins to drag the can to the road. As he closes the lid he notices said condom and you can guess where it goes from there. I didn’t learn that was the reason until I was about 14-15.

One time when I was 10-12 ish, I told a group of friends that I brushed my teeth with hot water instead of cold water (our cultural norm) just to seem quirky or cool, and man did it get the reaction I was hoping for. However, it was all a lie. I did brush with cold water. And this lie was too heavy for my pre-teen soul, so every day since then I have brushed my teeth with hot water, despite being 15 years older. I feel trapped in my hot teeth scrubbing sentence yet it feels right as a punishment for lying.

I was 10 ... My parents had been working day and night to get their start up business off the ground. ... After several months of spending my afternoons alone ... I decided to diversify my entertainment selection. I proceeded to ransack their entire office ... I broke a window and two lamps, smashed the legs off a chair, and pulled every file from the cabinets and tossed them around the room like confetti. I then called my mother and told her I’d just gotten home and found the place burglarized.
She told me to get out of the house, and called 911 on her way home. The cops arrived with their sirens blaring at about the same time she rolled up. They stormed the house with guns drawn, screaming, 'Come out with your hands up!' When I saw them going all Delta force through my front door, I knew that I had probably gone a little too far this time. Long story short, a detective came to take a report after the patrol cops had cleared the premises. As I was sitting on my living room sofa, surrounded by the tattered remains of my dirty work, the detective looked me dead in the eyes and said, 'There was no break in, was there?' The man looked right into my soul and knew the truth. ... Thankfully, I was young enough to escape any criminal charges.

My freshman year of highschool, I ditched class so much that I flunked the year. I moved to a different town over the summer and somehow they lost my "permanent record" in the mail. (Early 90s, so they had computers, but they weren't integrated between school districts, so it was just a fat folder of paperwork.) Anyway, when the new school realized this, they called me in and asked what classes and grades I had, so I straight up lied my way out of having to retake freshman year.

I (M25) had a threesome with two co-workers (M40 & F33). Now she's pregnant with her husband (atleast we think that it's his)