“What My Grandpa Did To Me”: 45 Secrets That People Swear They’ll Never Tell Their Parents

To gain more insight on the topic of keeping secrets from our parents, we reached out to Tori Finnegan, LCSW from Modern Therapy. Tori was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda and discuss how common it is to hold onto secrets.

"Keeping secrets can be healthy, and yes, everyone keeps some secrets. For many humans, 'keeping secrets' is synonymous with 'not sharing everything,'" she explained. "By not sharing every thought, word, and action with every person, we are all inherently keeping secrets from someone."

"What is important is evaluating what you are comfortable with sharing with others and what you would like to be known. We all have boundaries, and maintaining these emotional boundaries (such as not sharing certain information about ourselves), can be labeled as keeping secrets," the expert added.

When it comes to evaluating if a secret is harmless or needs to be revealed, Tori says we have to assess whether or not there is potential harm to someone. "This can be ourselves, someone else, or people in general. If there is a surprise party happening, and the guest of honor does not know about it, is there much risk of harm to them if we surprise them? No," she explained.

"If there is someone who is planning on hurting themselves or someone else, or is actively being hurt by someone, is there much risk of harm if we keep it a secret? Yes. Looking at the nature of the secret and whether or not someone could get hurt can be a helpful way to determine whether or not a secret needs to be revealed," Tori continued. "If there is danger, it is important to go to a trusted authority figure in order to maintain the safety of everyone involved."

While people keep secrets from their parents for many reasons, Tori says one common reason is a fear of judgment or potential punishment. "For some people, what they are doing may not be in alignment with their parents' views or expectations," she noted.

"This does not always mean what they are doing is harmful - for instance, rooting for the rival of the sports team your parents have rooted for for the past 30 years may not be something advertised, but ultimately doesn't hurt anybody," Tori explained. "Parents can withhold information or keep secrets from their children in order to help keep them safe and allow them space to explore their own sense of the world without interference."

"The adage 'secrets, secrets, are no fun, secrets secrets, hurt someone' offers some fair insight into not only the popularity of secrets, but also the gauge of when a secret should be revealed," Tori shared with Bored Panda. "Ultimately, each person is able to choose what they do and do not share with others."

"Whether it is that you are secretly a fan of Nickelback or that you root for the Red Sox in a Yankee household, most of us have some secret we keep to ourselves," she added. "If the secret puts someone else at risk, however, it is important to ensure that secret is revealed so that everyone has the opportunity to stay safe."