We'd all like to think we're pretty good at keeping our thoughts to ourselves. We smile when we're supposed to smile, nod along during conversations, and try not to look too suspicious when we're absolutely lost. But apparently, our bodies aren't always as good at keeping secrets as we are. The way we stand, where we look, what we do with our hands, or even how quickly we respond can give other people little clues about what's going on in our heads—often without us having the slightest idea we're doing it.
To find out exactly what these tells are, we dove into a Reddit thread where people with jobs like poker dealers, bartenders, TSA agents, and loss prevention officers were asked what they notice within the first 10 seconds of meeting someone. The answers were fascinating, so we gathered some of the most interesting responses, revealing the “tells” people often broadcast without even realizing it.
The intriguing part is that these aren't necessarily dramatic gestures or obvious signs. Sometimes, it's something incredibly subtle that most of us would never think twice about. So keep reading, Pandas, and see which everyday habits might say more about you than you realize.
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#21
I used to answer emails for a minor celeb, his show and another show. I could read one sentence into the email and I could tell if they were going to ask him to buy them something. Actual fan mail was short and sweet.
Crazy people write novels.
Crazy people write novels.
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11points
Another interesting clue is what happens when you're left alone with your thoughts. Psychology Today has highlighted how some people naturally find themselves returning to interesting things they've heard, read, or seen. Maybe you hear a strange fact and start wondering how it works. Perhaps something someone says during a conversation sticks in your mind and you find yourself thinking about it hours later. Instead of simply absorbing information and moving on, your brain keeps turning it over, looking for connections and trying to make sense of it.
#22
Poker PLAYER here…the first thing that I note is an unseasoned player in over their head loudly trying to establish table dominance because an actual experienced player tries to be nondescript, quiet and non-threatening. That flashy player is going to make messy stupid plays based on ego and hubris and is easy pickings with enough patience. I know, because I used to be that sloppy jerk (maybe still am, just a wee bit older now).
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11points
#23
Therapist in a dual-diagnosis program (substance use + mental health). Any move from baseline is something to pay attention to. Calm and depressed to bright and happy? Bad sign. Words not aligning with expressions or tone of voice, e.g., "I'm doing better" with closed posture, avoidant eye contact, flat tone = maybe not okay. Mostly though, if you let people talk long enough they'll tell on themselves. Especially if they think they're the smartest person in the room.
10points
#24
Talking about attending church in the first sentence. (Indicates impending lying in the next few sentences.) Me, an insurance adjuster.
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10points
That kind of curiosity can also spill over into creativity. Creative thinking isn't necessarily about sitting around waiting for one brilliant idea to arrive. It can involve experimenting with possibilities and being willing to see what happens. You try a different approach, test an idea, change something that isn't working, and learn from the result. You don't necessarily need to have complete control over the outcome before you begin.
Being comfortable with experimentation can therefore be another interesting quality to look for. Someone who is willing to explore an unfamiliar idea without immediately dismissing it may be demonstrating open-mindedness and intellectual flexibility. Again, none of these behaviors is a secret intelligence test, and it's important not to treat them as definitive proof that someone is smarter than everyone else. People are complicated, and intelligence itself comes in many forms.
#25
When I was a substitute teacher at the start of my career I had to be good at being able to tell which kid could be an issue. If you got that kid on your side in the first five minutes, class was easy. If you misread the situation, it was hell.
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10points
#26
I was a bartender for 6 years and now I'm a litigation lawyer. When men talk about their daughters - out of context and spontaneously - theyre about to try to manipulate you in some way shape or form. I have a daughter therefore I am a good man to trust.
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10points
#27
Incarcerated 15 years.
You have to read people in there, or you'll get taken off the count, quick.
That guy who tells you how bad he's gonna beat you? Don't worry about him. The guy that walks away and says nothing? That's the guy that's gonna be standing over you with a pencil stuck in your neck 6 months later.
You have to read people in there, or you'll get taken off the count, quick.
That guy who tells you how bad he's gonna beat you? Don't worry about him. The guy that walks away and says nothing? That's the guy that's gonna be standing over you with a pencil stuck in your neck 6 months later.
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10points
But that's what makes this whole topic so fascinating, Pandas. The professionals featured in today's post aren't necessarily looking at strangers and thinking, “Yep, that person has an IQ of 130.” They're noticing small behaviors, reactions, habits, and changes in body language that can tell them something about the person in front of them. And while intelligence isn't something you can reliably measure in a 10-second encounter, the way someone thinks can sometimes reveal itself in surprisingly subtle ways.
So, as you read through today's responses, keep an eye out for the little things people say they notice. Some of them might be obvious, while others are the kinds of behaviors most of us probably wouldn't think twice about. And who knows? You might even recognize a few in yourself.
#28
Therapist here. People telling me they are fine when they are in fact, not fine.
I used to look for long sleeves in warm weather.
Its a sign of hiding bruises, puncture marks, tatoos, not choosing life marks, burns, scabies, not washing, paranoia...
*I worked with clients with high needs, dependencies, and on mental health units. Not your 40 year old office workers who are cold because of the AC. .
I used to look for long sleeves in warm weather.
Its a sign of hiding bruises, puncture marks, tatoos, not choosing life marks, burns, scabies, not washing, paranoia...
*I worked with clients with high needs, dependencies, and on mental health units. Not your 40 year old office workers who are cold because of the AC. .
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8points
#29
People often impose personalities on others based on conscious or unconscious associations with individuals they've known in the past. Unless you're aware that this can happen, you might start off with prejudice or unwarranted attraction. When you're the person in power like a law enforcement officer, doctor, or potential employer, it can be a real problem.
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8points
#30
I’m a game show host , it’s literally my job to read the room and find the peoples funny bone … there’s a few tells , if what I say then what they say are two totally different things they’re not listening just waiting . So now I know when I go over rules to make sure everyone is looking at me and yadada. If they come in hot like bag on the counter pulling out paper work (I don’t need to see anything ) they’re type A and they’re stressing I let them know I got it from here and they loosen up instantly . I love reading people it’s literally my favorite thing to do as a host and comic .
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7points
#31
Retail security, but this goes for a lot of things- People that are up to something, they’re usually looking around. Even more suspicious when they don’t move their head- they just suddenly start cutting their eyes around. Especially towards the ceiling.
There’s all kinds of other tells though. Simple stuff. Most thieves carry a bag of some sort. They’re a higher risk than someone just walking with nothing. Most folks don’t just run out, they conceal first, but the ones that are going to run out, they pile things up quick. Another tell. And the bag thing goes for other stuff too. For some reason people that get up to some dumb stuff tend to have a backpack. And these days you got to find yourself concerned in security about what might be in someone’s backpack.
Sadly, COVID masks are a newer tell. Yeah, sounds like I’m being a jerk, but seriously… it’s come to a point where if someone’s wearing a COVID mask, they’re likely up to some shady stuff. Ain’t no reason five kids in a group would be coming to a store in COVID masks. If they were sick or worried about being sick. There might be one with their parents, or they’d be home. Not two or more together.
There’s all kinds of other tells though. Simple stuff. Most thieves carry a bag of some sort. They’re a higher risk than someone just walking with nothing. Most folks don’t just run out, they conceal first, but the ones that are going to run out, they pile things up quick. Another tell. And the bag thing goes for other stuff too. For some reason people that get up to some dumb stuff tend to have a backpack. And these days you got to find yourself concerned in security about what might be in someone’s backpack.
Sadly, COVID masks are a newer tell. Yeah, sounds like I’m being a jerk, but seriously… it’s come to a point where if someone’s wearing a COVID mask, they’re likely up to some shady stuff. Ain’t no reason five kids in a group would be coming to a store in COVID masks. If they were sick or worried about being sick. There might be one with their parents, or they’d be home. Not two or more together.
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7points
#32
Bartender: 1000 yard stare followed by a game of 21 questions as soon as they walk in.
You know you're dealing with someone who's already tilted, or someone who is about to become increasingly more annoying as they get drunk.
You know you're dealing with someone who's already tilted, or someone who is about to become increasingly more annoying as they get drunk.
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6points
#33
For me it is people who need more help than they are asking for. I help people with bills but I also have to read them for other things they might need help with so I can make recommendations/referrals/offer my own assistance such as conversation and physical contact like holding a hand. I would not say it is in the first 10 seconds, it takes time to determine.
They cannot read or write: they start to shake when I mention the application process. It can be a shiver, a waiver of the body, a tremble in the hand, a reach for their purse, their hands on the chair handles.
They have no human contact: they lean in, their clothing is filthy but they are not (older men who live alone), they reach across the desk and put their hand out without realizing it (yes, I take their hands and hold them), they don't want to go...they come back more frequently than needed.
They cannot process information at the rate at which I am providing it: they look around, they look down, they sit back in the chair, they say they don't actually need the help (this one also applies to those who feel shame).
They are afraid to ask for help: they peek in to the office, they are holding the application but won't come in or say what they need, they clutch things--their purse, their application or business card, a pen.
I love being able to read them so that I can bring things up without them having to ask. I wish they never switched me to remote. Trying to read people over the phone takes much longer and so much more work on my part. I'm sure I miss some of the cues.
They cannot read or write: they start to shake when I mention the application process. It can be a shiver, a waiver of the body, a tremble in the hand, a reach for their purse, their hands on the chair handles.
They have no human contact: they lean in, their clothing is filthy but they are not (older men who live alone), they reach across the desk and put their hand out without realizing it (yes, I take their hands and hold them), they don't want to go...they come back more frequently than needed.
They cannot process information at the rate at which I am providing it: they look around, they look down, they sit back in the chair, they say they don't actually need the help (this one also applies to those who feel shame).
They are afraid to ask for help: they peek in to the office, they are holding the application but won't come in or say what they need, they clutch things--their purse, their application or business card, a pen.
I love being able to read them so that I can bring things up without them having to ask. I wish they never switched me to remote. Trying to read people over the phone takes much longer and so much more work on my part. I'm sure I miss some of the cues.
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6points
#34
When skinny people are bluffing, you can usually see their pulse in their jugular. I won a tournament because of this once many years ago. Kid pushed. Then I watched his pulse increase in his neck, it was obvious. I knew he was bluffing, nobody gets that excited when they know they have a good hand.
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6points
#35
When someone feels the need to highlight one of their strengths unprompted (ie: Listen guys, I'm pretty laid back, so don't hesitate to come and chat), they aren't.
I'd say 95% of the time people tell you who they are by what they're doing, not by what they say. If they need to tell you with their words, its because they struggle to demonstrate it and they are convincing themselves as much as you.
I'd say 95% of the time people tell you who they are by what they're doing, not by what they say. If they need to tell you with their words, its because they struggle to demonstrate it and they are convincing themselves as much as you.
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6points
#36
Shoulders and chin can tell you a lot about somebody's level of stress and confidence in that moment. There's no universal tell though; EVERYTHING depends on context, so the real read is not the person, it's the room they're in. The more you know about someone's environment, motivations, and background, the clearer picture body language and affect can paint for you.
5points
#37
Pharmacy owner here. If you come in and start telling me your life story, worse, ask me tons of questions about myself and flatter me in a rehearsed cadence, I can almost guess the exact prescription you are going to ask if I have or will fill for you.
Look, I get it. I get the socioeconomic system. I get the actual hell you’re trying to escape. I’ll help if it’s not in a way that hurts you or your friends. Just hand me the prescription and don’t give me a ton of stuff to document.
Look, I get it. I get the socioeconomic system. I get the actual hell you’re trying to escape. I’ll help if it’s not in a way that hurts you or your friends. Just hand me the prescription and don’t give me a ton of stuff to document.
5points
#38
Bartender: People who close out their tab after each drink want an easy getaway. It's more work for me and I'd rather them leave their tab open if they are going to order more drinks, but I get it.
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5points
#39
As a radiologist whose job it also is to read people for a living- I’d say tooth health is telling of overall health on scans.
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5points
#40
If someone talks a lot but says very little, they're lying.
Have someone explain a situation to you, and they drone on and on and you still have no idea what the situation was about, they're lying.
Have someone explain a situation to you, and they drone on and on and you still have no idea what the situation was about, they're lying.
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5points
