Most people understand that servers are people just like them, so they treat them accordingly. With politeness, respect, and dignity. Others, however, think that just because they’re dining out, they ‘deserve’ to be treated like royalty.
That sort of entitled behavior can backfire very quickly. Sometimes, servers push back. Gently. And with wit. Redditor u/bambieyedbiatch recently shared with the r/pettyrevenge community how she clapped back at an incredibly rude restaurant customer. Scroll down for the full story!
Bored Panda reached out to the author of the story, redditor u/bambieyedbiatch, and she was kind enough to share her thoughts on handling rude customers and the ups and downs of working at a restaurant. The OP told us that she has worked in the restaurant industry for 8 years as a host, server, bartender, and manager. "I have my fair share of customer tales. Most of them I don’t look back on fondly, so this one was different," she said. You'll find our full interview as you read on.
Restaurant staff inevitably have to deal with overly entitled customers from time to time
Image credits: macniak / envato (not the actual photo)
One server shared the witty way she got revenge against a very rude woman in her section
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: bambieyedbiatch
The author suggests leading with empathy and kindness in all interactions with customers
The author told Bored Panda that she wasn't surprised by the customer's rudeness. "It’s not like it is an uncommon thing that happens once in a blue moon. I’m not usually one to confront a situation. I’m more of the cry-in-the-walk-in cooler type. I just didn’t have it in me to take it that day. College is hard," u/bambieyedbiatch opened up to us.
"As I said, it happens all of the time. It’s not exclusive to gender, race, age, or any other demographic marker. Each difficult guest situation is different. There are so many different things that can impact or cause a blowup in a restaurant. As much as I would like there to be a secret, I don’t think there is. It’s just human interaction."
The OP stressed the importance of empathy and kindness when dealing with customers. "It sets an expectation for the interaction. If I come over yelling and cursing, the guest will too. Treat others the way you would like to be treated and all that," she said. However, if things escalate, then all the politeness goes out the window.
"I will say, the moment a guest is aggressive with me (I.e. cursing, yelling, anything physical) they are kicked out of the establishment. Maybe with a few fun words."
Working as a server has its ups and downs, but it can be incredibly rewarding
We were interested to get the redditor's thoughts on working as a server at a restaurant. She was happy to share some pearls of wisdom with anyone who's new to the food service industry.
"Although working in a restaurant is difficult (and to those who don’t agree, yes it is) it is so rewarding. I loved being able to be a happy part of someone’s day. Knowing that they could come into the restaurant hungry and/or having a bad day, and they could leave full and happy (maybe even with a smile), it makes it all worth it," u/bambieyedbiatch said.
"The truth is that sometimes humans have bad days and sometimes they are just bad humans." Unfortunately, the redditor had to deal with some truly awful human beings who have assaulted, harassed, and threatened her. On the flip side, she's also had some extremely positive experiences.
"I have also had guests who tip me 200% of the bill, guests who have advocated for me with other guests/managers, and regulars who bring me Christmas presents. I got to see a relationship from their first date to when he proposed 3 years later. How fun is that?!"
However, the OP warned, the job can be very draining, physically, mentally, as well as emotionally.
"Take it day by day, shift by shift. Don’t look at your tips until the end of the night. Be kind to the cooks and the dishwasher. Do your sidework. Be the person you would want to work with," she advised all servers.
Not all rude customers are alike. Veteran servers can quickly tell who's entitled and who's just having a bad day
There is no reason to treat your server with disrespect. However, anyone who’s worked in the food service industry knows that rude customers are an inevitability. At some point, you’ll have to wait on someone who treats you badly.
Now, any experienced restaurant employee probably instinctively knows how to distinguish between two broad categories of rude customers.
The first ones are simply having a bad day. But they’re not fundamentally bad people. Sometimes, no matter how polite we generally are, we might snap because we’re overstressed, overworked, and exhausted. A bit of empathy goes a long way when taking their order. Most people just want to be heard and understood.
The second group is far more difficult to handle. These people generally have a standoffish nature. Over time, they’ve learned that they can get what they want by behaving bluntly and putting staff members in awkward positions. Or they have close to no emotional regulation. Dealing with them requires a far more subtle approach.
Ideally, you want to find a balance between staying calm, cool, and collected, as well as enforcing some healthy boundaries. In other words, you want to seem as professional as possible while also pointing out that you will not tolerate awful behavior from your customers.
Good training and managerial support makes all the difference and can give your employees a lot of confidence to handle delicate situations
How you’ll approach things will depend on a lot of factors. Like the specific situation. The people you’re serving. Who your manager and coworkers are that day. What the ‘style’ of the restaurant is. And the types of policies and training the company put in place to handle problematic customers.
A more laid-back restaurant and manager might allow more flexibility when it comes to using humor with customers. Meanwhile, a more upscale place would have far stricter protocols in place of what (not) to do.
Quality training goes a very long way. Restaurant owners and managers ought to invest in it so that their staff have experience handling stressful situations with grace and ease. And training isn’t a one-off thing, either. A company that has a growth-oriented mindset knows to periodically invest in staff training to sharpen their skills.
Role-playing is a particularly good way for restaurant staff to get to grips with strange and uncomfortable scenarios. Forewarned is forearmed. Once they’ve run through these simulations a few times, they’ll be better equipped to handle rude customers in real life.
If being friendly, polite, patient, or witty doesn’t seem to work, the servers need to know, for a fact, that they can rely on their managers for support. Managers need to know when to step in and how to mediate the situation in a fair way. On the flip side, servers also have to know when to ask for help. After all, no, the customer is not always right.
The author was happy to engage with some of her fellow internet users in the comments
Many readers enjoyed the story and wanted to share their personal thoughts about the situation
