30 Times Adults Over 30 Should Have Known Better But Still Made These Mistakes

Using people for sex. I specifically regret not being more gentle with their emotions and being more honest about mine.

I wasn't a womanizer but there were a couple occasions when I knew I would seriously break a really great girl's heart and I did it anyway. I'm ashamed of myself for doing that.

I fell for all the finance manager’s tricks when I bought my car about 10 years ago. I ended up buying a bunch of dealer extended warranties that I didn’t want because he snuck an extra 6 months worth of payments. I thought the sales guy was the one to watch out for, but he was easy. I bought a new car for my wife recently and I want in to the finance managers office expecting another ambush, but it was fine. I just got a real dirt bag last time.

Still make friends that I am not compatible with, who have used and abused me, force me into friendships. Most of my psychological harm has been caused in the last 6/7 years by narcissistic or dismissive people. They latch on to you and don’t let go. I need to stand up and just cut them immediately.

Not getting myself out of a long distance commute in my 50s, which probably caused me to retire sooner than I would have otherwise. Gripping the wheel for all that time also worsened the arthritis in my left hand to the point that I can’t work on cars.

Dated someone else with bipolar again. I have bipolar so dating someone else with bipolar is a really bad idea. You would have thought I would have learned the first time around but apperently not. At least the second guy wasn't anywhere near as bad as the first one. Je is a halfway decent guy it's just when I date people with bipolar our mental health problems feed off each other. It's just not healthy for anyone in the situation.

I didn't make the mistake but 2 people in my friend group did.

There are 5 of us that grew up together and are still friends. Up to our late 20s none of us had real jobs or responsibilities. Every weekend was party time. I got married at 33, got a really good job and consider myself in a good place mentally and financially.

But two of my friends are now nearly 50, have never had permanent employment and basically survive by help from friends and relatives. They still drink and smoke weed almost on a daily basis. As far as I know they have no mental or physical issues that would keep them in their current situation. I've just come to the conclusion that they are lazy.

That could easily of been me. I credit my spouse and family 100% for helping me not make that mistake.

People still drink and drive well past age 30. I doubt how much it will cost them (or whoever they kill) ever enters their mind.

BTW if you live and breathe you will make mistakes, growing wiser means you take responsibility for them ( meaning you stop whining "It's not my faultttttt) and limit the fallout to others.

Yes, you are still capable of making bad mistakes past your 30's.

But what does happen is that, *if you reflect on your mistakes and treat them as the learning opportunities that they are*, you make fewer mistakes and the consequences become less severe.

For example, I used to say and do things during fights with my wife that really hurt her and brought us to the brink of divorce. I wasn't *trying* to. I just didn't have enough awareness of how I was hurting her. Now our fights are less common and less painful, even though I'm still not perfect.

The same decrease in frequency and severity happens in your work life as well. It's why VP's and CEO's tend to be old. You don't want the people with the most power to sink your company to be people who haven't made enough mistakes in life to figure out how to reduce the frequency and severity of their mistakes.

Cashing in stock options to pay bills; the employer who'd issued them has since become acquired X2. Lost just under $500K. So that's fun.

Getting a better job a with a decent boost in salary when I was in my early 30s, then being complacent and not taking my career any further because (due to my low self-esteem) I assumed this was as good as it gets. So treaded water for 20 years until I was laid off (though did good work and was well-regarded by my employer). If I could turn back time I would have spent those 20 years networking, job hopping and aggressively doing everything I could to advance my career.