30 Parents Anonymously Share What They Dislike About Their Children

Well, recently I had a serious depressive episode. I grew up in very abusive homes, and my parenting strategy was to get a parent educator and, within reason, err on the side of loving and doting on my kids.
Aside from my mental illness, I was working three jobs and both my kids are both special needs. My daughter is violent, strong, and I tried for over a year to get professional help for her. I knew she would have a hard life if she didn't get straightened out before school.
My behavior was this bad as a kid, and the social repercussions gave me depression and low self esteem. I was heartbroken thinking my daughter was going to grow up with those issues. I was terrified she was going to grow up to be like me.
I couldn't bear to see that, so I was considering giving my kids up or leaving. But I knew if I did either, and continued to live, I would feel worse. I became suicidal. After two extended hospitalizations, I am well.
But I had to lie and say I had thoughts of killing my daughter. I'm ashamed. But the first time I was hospitalized, I begged for help, it was promised, but never came. So I had to go beyond and force the hands of the social workers and child mental health people.
We have services now. I still have my kids, and never stopped loving them.

They weren't mine, the wife cheated on me.

I have a 31 year old daughter. I tried to get pregnant and was thrilled when she came. Her father and I divorced and did everything I could as a single mom to raise her right. When I remarried she hated that she was no longer the center of attention and everything went to hell. She was later diagnosed as bi-polar and has it is bad enough that she is on disability. She rebelled in high school and even tho we sent her to college she wouldn't go to class and snuck back to spend time with her boyfriend. One semester was all it took and we gave up. She ended up on drugs, and her addictions went from Meth to Oxy to Heroin. She stole from me, I had her arrested. I have done everything I could to help her and she is still troubled.

While I don't hate her, I hate what she is right now. She will still steal from me given the chance. She was over last week and stole my dish washing liquid, the silver coins out of my change cup and some things out of my cupboard. Had she asked, I would have given them to her. She also stole a bottle of Vicodin from when I hurt my rotator cuff a few weeks ago. She is my only daughter and every dream I ever had for her will never happen.

I was 17 and found out the 22 year old sex friend got pregnant despite her on birth control and me using a condom at least 50% of the time. I told her to get an abortion which she said no to originally because she really actually wanted to have "my child"

She tried convincing me with stuff like: with both of us as parents the baby'll be gorgeous, she'll have my smarts, I won 't have to change my lifestyle since it'll be better to be educated, her parents can help out etc. etc. etc.

I didn't buy it. I finally convinced her to abort but she said we needed to end things so I ended up one less sex friend.

Fast forward 6 years

I've been in an accident that left me quadriplegic two years ago. I get added on facebook by my former sex friend. SHE HAS A SIX YEAR OLD DAUGHTER.

I didn't feel betrayed...I FELT TERRIBLE. She may have had the child against my will but I JUST LEFT HER TO FEND FOR HERSELF FOR SIX YEARS. WHAT KIND OF INHUMANE ACT IS THAT? She told me she just found out I had my accident even though it was a while and not to worry about money or being a father figure to OUR daughter. I'm hounded by all these conflicting feelings.

I don't need to be a father figure because her fiancé will take care of it. I want to.
I don't need to help support? I want to.
I don't need to care about them? I want to.
I cant help out because I'm crippled? I want to.
Im not allowed to be near them because it'll interfere with their newly wed life?

I feel like the life I should have had doesn't want me. I never wanted a daughter but that doesn't matter because she went ahead and had her anyway. I should help her instead I'm out partying and dating frivolously until I ended up quadriplegic.

I want to be able to support her but I can't.

I don't even know anymore but I've built up so much resentment...and JEALOUSY that I..."dislike" them.

Thank you all. I've really wanted to ask this question to see if others felt like me but have been too afraid to out myself.

I've always wanted what most girls wanted: Husband, children, be a crafty stay at home pinterest mom. Ended up with baby #1 way sooner than we planned because we were stupid. Baby #2 was a birth control failure. I tried to be a stay at home when #1 was a baby but it was hell (turns out she had autism with sensory issues). I couldn't wait to get back to work.
Occasionally they'll do something cute, or crawl into my lap, and that makes me feel something. But since we had them so young, every day I feel annoyed that we're constantly broke and there's not much I can do about it. I can't put in extra hours at work because I have to pick up the kids after school. We've put in many thousands of dollars to daycare/afterschool care that could've gone to paying off student loans. We should be saving for a house but instead I have to buy winter clothes for them because they outgrew last year's.

I don't hate my kids by any means... but I think a lot about how life would be different without them.

I didn't want him. A long time ago I thought I wanted a kid, but after having to raise my sister's for a while, I realized that I didn't. My wife wanted a kid. I tried to convince her of what raising one is like, that everything you are goes into the child. She told me she was going off her birth control, I just didn't expect her to go off so soon.

We now have one. He is adorable. But I do not love him. I feel very little for him. I wish he hadn't been born. He has financially hit us hard, I am having to rearrange a lot of projects I've been working on for years, which means making other people rearrange their lives for him, and what is worse, he has taken my wife's creative energy out of her. She barely has any time to work on her art, and when she has the time, she doesn't have the energy.

I want to start by saying that I am not at the point where I do not love my daughter, but there are days that I look at her and just view her as a human that I have to care for out of obligation. Maybe it is because I never wanted children, my fiancé basically left us, and I am in the middle of my nursing degree (which adds an intense amount of stress..). I don't think I have it bad compared to others, but it really doesn't help that I didn't want children, and I really wanted to develop my career and even continue my education as a nurse practitioner. There are many many things I wanted to do during my career besides just continuing education, but now with a child I can't do them. It doesn't necessarily make me not love her, but it definitely stirs up some bad and really negative feelings towards being the mother I should be. I feel like a big part of me has been stripped away, and when my fiancé took the path that he did I then had absolutely no help with her, so I felt even more defeated. I'm not sure if this is a satisfactory answer to your question.. But wanted to give my perspective as a parent who is kind of caught in the middle.

My wife wanted kids, I didn't. But I loved her more than I didn't want kids so we had two.

I never loved them or genuinely cared about them. I did all of the father stuff, more than most honestly. A ton of people who know me personally won't shut up about how amazing of a father I am/how they wish their husbands were as good to their children as I am to mine.

But it's all an act. I can't wait until they move out and I don't have to worry about them anymore. Can't wait to get my life back.

My throwaway for obvious reasons.

I'm a mother to a very lively child of about 8. I never wanted kids. Ever.

At the time I was a mess, on a massive psychiatric cocktail from hell (which, as a fun fact, turns out was all a misdiagnosis from the start, as I had the right combination at 13 of anxiety, depression, and so many damn hormones to get myself a diagnosis for a far worse condition), I only started dating the dude due to a horribly bitter breakup from a very longtime relationship, and I was miserable and back home for the first time in my adult life.

But, he had known that I didn't want kids. At the time, I couldn't take any form of hormonal birth control, due to the cocktail above. I wasn't aware of any other options.

Her father and I were in a really rough patch, and I think he realized there wasn't much hope of me staying with him for much longer. He was right in that, as I would likely have left shortly after.

So, one night he's frisky, and promises he's wearing protection (I was rather drunk as it was right after a formal event for his unit (just, so much drinking. I was a huge lightweight at the time) - so as I had no other reason to not trust him- we do what couples do. He, of course, lied to me, which I found out after.

We get married, mostly for healthcare. I won't lie, in hindsight - this was a huge f*****g mess. But, at the time I was convinced it was the only option I had.

I really want to go back in time and punch myself in the fact. Just, right in the face.

So, suddenly I'm pregnant.

He was deployed almost immediately after. So, here I am - pregnant, alone, absolutely terrified, and quite honestly assuming my (ex)husband is going to die overseas, and I'm f*****g lost. I cannot ever remember feeling like this before.

Happy 24th birthday, me!

As for now?

Now the kid is 8. He's started cheating a long time ago (go on, act surprised!). Right after he came back from deployment, he's cheated with about 50 odd women (paid and not) and spent literally all of our combined money (well over 40,000 in savings).

While yes, a LOT of f*****g amazingly wonderful things have happened due to this kid, I'm still at a loss over things. If he calls once in 6 months, it's amazing. But, to a degree I guess that I consider lucky. My parents have helped out, and I've met someone amazing.

But, it's not the life I wanted for anyone. It's not fair to my kid, and it's not fair (selfishly) to me.

I'm not maternal, at all. I do love her, don't get me wrong. But I'm the exact opposite of anything maternal it's not funny. I wanted to be like my mom, but I'm just not. I have her always and forever, but I'm bad at this, and I have no idea what I'm doing.

I see all these moms posting all this amazing stuff, and I want to feel this way. I don't think it's just her, as since everything, I've realized - I have a hard time forming bonds with people, and here I have this screaming mess of a tiny human at times, and I have no idea what I'm doing. I'm envious of these woman who have that love I can't seem to form.

I was adopted myself, and while my family has been nothing short of amazing, I think it's done a number on me in general.

If I had ever had kids, I wanted them to be planned and very much wanted at the time. When I had her - I was broke, beyond lost, and I hated her dad (he confessed to me that he had 'won' after I told him during a call that I had heard her heart beating, he confessed the rest after I asked him what that meant).

Now, I'm doing better. So is the kid. I wish I could say that my family had stepped in and realized that I was horribly suffering, but no. My family cannot for the life of them understand why I'm not defaulting to maternal. They've actually been far more of a hindrance on the process than anything. If she's upset, or cries, it's clearly my fault. If I say 'no' I'm overreacting. I've given up on my family due to all this.

But, I have a good job, and am able to support us. So, I guess that's something in and of itself. So, I would like to have that final 'planned' child, which may or may not happen. I love her, but I want to experience something like that, someday. Oddly, I do think it would help. But, to be fair, I guess I don't really care if I have anymore.

At this point, I'm still home for a bit longer. But, we're managing. I'm miserable, but am hoping things will start looking up soon.

I do love my kid. But at the same time I regret every moment I've lived since I knocked up the psycho mother. I NEVER wanted kids. I LOATHE kids. But my hormones got the better of me and, long story short, I'm now a single father with sole custody of a whiny, bitchy, mental-as-hell- 10 year old that I had to take out of school due to daily breakdowns and panic attacks. My child's shrinks (yes plural) say to not push school as it promotes panic attacks so I lost my job 2 months ago as I had no one to take car of the kid during the day. Now Christmas is upon us, I'm broke, and if it wasn't for the kindness of my parents, I'd be boned. The only reason I stepped up and have tried with all my might to be a father is because my (real) father ran off when I was only 2 and had himself a great life full of money and fun. Until he married the black widow and ended up dead anyway LOL. So I admit openly to being bitter. My dad was s**t, my ex is s**t, my life is s**t. I can't get a job because my mom is no longer capable of babysitting my kid for me, and if I can't get them back into school, I'm never gonna get my life back. P.S. Anyone willing to hunt down and kill my kid's mom feel free. She really does deserve it. She is a horrid person. She ditched all 3 of her kids to party, become an alcoholic, and worm her way into marrying a guy making 80k a year. Still has nothing to do with her 3 kids because she is too busy being drunk and doesn't pay those taking care of her kids a damn penny.