35 Petty, Absurd, And Juicy Drama Happening At These People's Offices Right Now

Marlene Chism, the author of Stop Workplace Drama and No-Drama Leadership, explained that while not all gossip is toxic, it is destructive when people use it to harm others. "For example, when you make assumptions about someone’s intention instead of asking them directly, or when someone spreads rumors because they haven’t had the courage to confront the issue directly," she said.

There are several explanations why people often get drawn into these little disagreements and gossip. "One reason is to be part of the 'in crowd' and another reason is boredom," the executive educator stated. "In addition, social media makes it more likely to engage in distractions simply because we have become undisciplined, and we easily take the bait when we get triggered or feel misunderstood."

Chism told us that these distractions ultimately get in the way of our mental health and productivity, so it takes more discipline and courage to identify them and refrain from engaging in them.

We also managed to get in touch with Kaley Klemp, an expert in small-group dynamics and leadership development, and co-author of The Drama-Free Office. She added that so many of us spend a significant amount of time at work, and "because that work is meaningful both in terms of our sense of contribution and financial wellbeing, it’s easy for things to take on additional symbolic meaning, which can lead to drama."

People often take part in office gossip when there isn’t a culture of candor and feedback. "When people don't approach a person quickly and directly, little misunderstandings can escalate. There can be a short-term energy boost when engaging in gossip, but it doesn’t last and, in the long run, usually undermines trust," Klemp noted.

Drama often finds a way to turn into big arguments or long-lasting bickerings. However, no matter how it manifests, it can be a highly disruptive force inside a company. Chism explained that where we put our attention is where we put our energy. "Building habits of engaging in drama ensures that you build more networks in the brain to focus on and foster drama. It doesn’t take a white paper to know that workplace conflict causes stress and stress affects productivity."

"The need to be right is a sign that the ego has taken center stage. What’s missing in our world right now is the willingness to consider another point of view, the willingness to be curious and the willingness to be wrong. I always say that it’s not disagreements that ruin relationships, it’s disrespect. Most of us don’t know the difference."

If you’re already wondering about ways to stay out of such drama, Chism argued avoidance is not necessarily a good strategy. "In fact, avoiding may make a drama-filled situation even worse," the executive educator said and added she dives deeper into the topic of the cost of avoidance, especially for leaders, in her forthcoming book From Conflict to Courage.

"There’s a difference between setting a boundary and avoiding. You can set a boundary and say, 'I refuse to gossip about other people,' which is different than avoiding the subject when it comes up and allowing the behaviors to continue."

"Rather than perpetuating drama, I recommend looking for ways to constructively work together to understand and address the source of the situation," Klemp added. "Anytime there is drama, it’s worth getting curious about your own role, and how you can most skillfully navigate it. Ideally, companies are able to create norms around raising disagreements and a shared vocabulary and structure to do so, such that they can be constructive learning opportunities for all involved."

If you want to create a drama-free culture, you must first understand what’s in your control and what’s outside of your control. Chism said that while you can’t control other people, you can manage your own behavior.

"If your culture is full of drama, consider finding another place to work. It’s very difficult to swim upstream. In the meantime, you can get clear on your values, and then behave according to your values."

"Others judge you not by what you say you believe but by how your actions align with what you say you want. Be the change you want to see and stop justifying your behavior based on what everyone else does. If you want peace, be peaceful. If you want kindness, be kind," Chism concluded.