Nobody enjoys being cut off or bumped into, yet these things happen all the time — both to and because of us.
Experts say that such behaviors instigate a self-perpetuating cycle, hampering our productivity, our happiness, and our health along the way.
So incivility is like a virus. Contract the stuff, and there's a big chance you can spread it without even consciously wanting to.
Interested in which of its forms are the most common, Reddit user MaximumHemidrive asked others on the platform to share what people say and do without realizing it's actually quite hurtful.
#1
If someone declines alcohol, do not insist, and do not ask them why.
Report
206points
#2
LISTENING TO ANYTHING IN PUBLIC WITH YOUR VOLUME ON. This includes TikTok, YouTube, social media, face timing, phone on speaker, music, etc. No one gives a f**k what media you’re consuming. Airports especially seem to attract this in droves like earbuds or headphones don’t exist?? If i can hear your phone you are getting The Glare. Learn to adjust to polite society.
Report
165points
#3
Looking at your phone whilst someone talks to you. Put your phone DOWN and live in the moment that is REAL. Your phone is just a waste of your time 90% of the time! Enjoy a real face to face conversation!.
Report
135points
#5
Asking when you're going to have kids.
My fiancée had a hysterotomy a few years ago because reasons. We're planning to adopt and we're both fine with it. There's enough people in this world and we don't need to make more ourselves. She gets asked a lot when we're planning to have kids and she replies, completely deadpan, "I'm infertile" and the uncomfortable look on their faces when they don't know how to respond gives us both great joy. We hope it helps them think twice before asking someone else. I can't wait to marry that woman.
Report
130points
#6
Giving any sort of unsolicited advice on someone's physical appearance.
129points
#7
Saying "it was God's will" when someone you care about dies. So inappropriate yet so many people do it anyway.
127points
#8
“Smile!” Had a coworker that kept telling me to smile and I had to talk to a manager about it. I’m a large rough looking man and apparently my resting staring off into space face offended her. I live with chronic pain, so no, I don’t feel like smiling when I’m not interacting with anyone. I’m not scowling, I’m not mad I’m just not happy.
Report
119points
#9
Being chronically ill and constantly being told "well at least it isn't cancer". No but it's stuff I have to live the rest of my life with. Also "but you look ok". Crazy how most all of my body is on the inside me.
Report
118points
#10
Stepping off a full escalator and then standing still while looking around. Bro, just take 4-5 steps forward to figure yourself out!.
Report
114points
#11
Commenting on weight in any way - “you’re so skinny” isn’t always a compliment.
Report
106points
#12
Leaving your grocery cart in the middle of the aisle so others cannot pass. It’s inconsiderate and infuriating.
Report
104points
#15
People getting on an elevator before allowing people who are on it to get off.
Report
91points
#16
Approach a disabled person you don’t know to call them brave, inspirational, etc. Especially if you are using them as an example to children. Every single disabled person I have ever met HATES when people do this. It’s calling unnecessary attention to them and a lot of people feel put on the spot, so it’s not a kind or respectful thing to do.
Just leave people the f**k alone, they’re not here to be your example or your teachable moment.
87points
#17
Talking loudly while traveling in herds with no spatial awareness. The random scream. Think college freshman packs or middle schoolers at the mall.
Report
87points
#18
People who let their dogs jump up on you. Hey I love dogs but I’m not in the mood of having dirty paws on my nice clean clothes.
Report
85points
#20
Talking to someone about work when they're eating their lunch on their lunch break.
Report
77points