When asked whether there is a point where obsessing over improving ourselves and our wellbeing becomes unhealthy, Marlo said that in general, anything that becomes an obsession, including wellness, is unhealthy.“The quest for wellness, improvement, and growth can be mistakenly regarded as healthy because it is lauded; tied to greater success, worth, and higher status; and is so socially acceptable. A lack of wellness is often associated with personal or moral failure or weakness that could or should be fixed.”
According to her, “obsessional quest for improvement and wellbeing can obscure our real psychological challenges around knowing and accepting our human limits and the limits of others as well as accepting the inevitable limitations and suffering in life that have to be lived through.”
“In my practice, I usually find that individuals obsess over things that they have not actually thought about enough!” Marlo said. She explained further: “That is, they fixate on the part that is easy for them, and fail to look at the whole picture, especially what is hard for them, including what else is related to the obsession that they may not want to know about.”
Marlo also said that becoming lost in obsessions around self-improvement and wellbeing can preclude other kinds of knowing. “The obsessional pursuit of growth and wellness can often limit one from realizing the value of brokenness and imperfection. Often, it does not affirm or leave space for being receptive, patient, accepting, tolerant, and open to the understanding that genuine growth is, often, a developmental process that occurs over time,” she concluded.
