We all know that dating is hard (and the pandemic’s not making things easier) and nearly everyone has at least one truly awful horror story of a date they like to tell others to warn them of what’s out there. However, even some of our worst experiences can pale in comparison when we realize what stories are out there on the internet.
We’ve waded knee-deep through broken dreams, dashed expectations, and all-around romantic ickiness to bring you these stories of the worst dates ever that people shared on r/AskReddit here, here, and elsewhere. Scroll down to read about them. While some are absolutely creepy, others have a tinge of dark humor to them. When you’re done reading, you might want to take a gander at Bored Panda’s previous article about the worst first dates ever, right over here.
I reached out to relationship expert Dan Bacon, the founder of The Modern Man, for advice on dating and why it’s actually vital to keep going on dates if we want to see success in our relationships. He explained to Bored Panda that just because we’re in a long-term relationship, it doesn’t automatically make all of our dates great. Or that they happen at all. Scroll down to have a read, dear Pandas.
#1
Oh boy finally my time to shine!
I talked to a girl on tinder 8 years ago. She got drunk and told me to come over because her and friends were playing strip poker. I was on overnight duty so sadly I could not partake. 30 minutes later i recieve a picture on my phone that i couldn't even make out. I handed my phone to my roomate and asked if he could figure it out. He says "dude. Thats a butthole." It surely was. She had taken a picture of her butthole from at measly 0.5 inches away and it was so close up i could barely tell what it was. I thought to myself if this is how she leads the rest has to be great! (Spoiler alert: was wrong.)
She tells me we should finally meet next weekend. At applesbees. I meet her there and she looks BEAT. Like she had just run 5 triathalons and been awake for a week straight. Not 3 minutes into meeting and sitting down she says she has to use the restroom. She doesnt come back for 30min+. The waiter comes up and says he has seen her here multiple times and she has been known to shoot up heroin in the bathroom and pass out. Im very not into this at this point but for her own safety i ask if a waitress could peak in the bathroom and see if she is okay. She was not. She OD'd and died. So that was a thing.
TLDR: my tinder date showed me her butthole then OD'd and died at Applebee's.
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572points
#2
Dating app, smallish town Kingston Ontario. Go on a few boring dates. Cue story. Match with girl, she agrees to meet but there was something odd about the conversation. She was eager to meet, suspiciously eager. I get to the Starbucks and wait inside for 20 minutes past the agreed meet time. Girl texts me says she running late, asks me to stand outside so she can see me as she drives by. I look over and theres another dude standing on the sidewalk with his phone in his hand. Recognize him from the gym, ask if hes also meeting a girl, and what her name is. Turns out the girl was pulling a fast one on us both as revenge for her girlfriend who we both apparently dated once and didn’t like. So him and I went to get ice-cream together and sent her a photo of us having a great time. Wish I still had the photo!
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304points
#3
I took a shot at asking this girl out from down the hall in my apartment. She says yes and we go out to dinner. Right off the bat we learn that we have a mutual connection, a coworker of mine was her best friend - ok, cool.
I order up a martini, she awkwardly orders a rum and coke. It was at that point I realized she either doesn't drink often, or she drinks way too often (who orders a rum an coke to go with dinner?). Anyways, two drinks in she starts telling me how she has conversations with her dead dog and how her dead father sends her text messages. Then, she informs me that she is heavily medicated and those meds shouldn't be mixed with alcohol. Another 10 mins later after I try to get her to drink some water, she is trying to pick food from the other tables plates and her boob is hanging out. Straight dangling. I try to help her out of the restaurant to get her home, some chads think I'm trying to take advantage of her so now I'm dealing with that. She ends up calling her friend and my coworker while I'm busy getting her a cab and tells my coworker that I got her drunk while she was on her meds (she is getting emotional now that she realizes I'm sending her home). Before she leaves she pukes down the back side of my shirt. I just bought that shirt that day.
I order up a martini, she awkwardly orders a rum and coke. It was at that point I realized she either doesn't drink often, or she drinks way too often (who orders a rum an coke to go with dinner?). Anyways, two drinks in she starts telling me how she has conversations with her dead dog and how her dead father sends her text messages. Then, she informs me that she is heavily medicated and those meds shouldn't be mixed with alcohol. Another 10 mins later after I try to get her to drink some water, she is trying to pick food from the other tables plates and her boob is hanging out. Straight dangling. I try to help her out of the restaurant to get her home, some chads think I'm trying to take advantage of her so now I'm dealing with that. She ends up calling her friend and my coworker while I'm busy getting her a cab and tells my coworker that I got her drunk while she was on her meds (she is getting emotional now that she realizes I'm sending her home). Before she leaves she pukes down the back side of my shirt. I just bought that shirt that day.
I ended up meeting my now wife at the bar that night while I was trying to drink off the memories of what just occured. She thought it was weird that I had on a white undershirt, my pants were wet and I was holding a button down shirt. To this day she still laughs at the stupid situations I get into.
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266points
Relationship expert Dan, who created The Modern Man project to help guide people in the dating world, believes that it’s very important for the health of any relationship to keep going on dates, no matter how long you’ve been dating.
He explained to Bored Panda that dating, in essence, helps keep partners attracted to each other. Naturally, when the date goes well. Unfortunately, many couples simply forget about dating when they’ve been together for years and years. This is a mistake that could cost you the relationship and plunge you back into the messy world of (online and traditional) dating as you can see in the r/AskReddit posts.
#4
First date with a guy I met on a dating app. I sat down and he immediately was like "Oh yes, you are hotter than your pictures and you're my girlfriend now." Came on real strong. I chalked it up to keenness at first (maybe a weird sense of humour?) and figured I'd at least stick around for a drink or two, feel it out. Even offered to buy the first round, partly as an excuse to get away from the table for a second. I made some unrelated comment to the bartender that made him laugh, and when I got back to the table, dude LOST HIS S**T. Wanted to know what I said, whether I thought the bartender was good-looking... Had somehow gotten insta-jealous of this bartender five minutes after meeting me. There was no second drink.
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236points
#5
I went out for dinner and a movie with a guy. I tried to chip in money at both, but he insisted that he cover it all. At the end of the night, we're sitting in his car in the parking lot of the restaurant we had just eaten at, and he asks for a BJ saying "I mean, I bought you dinner and took you to a movie, it's the least you can do".
Thankfully I lived nearby, I hopped out and walked home.
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223points
#6
My wife wanted to plan our 13th wedding anniversary. I was excited because usually I plan it. She bought us some new disc golf discs and after a quick supper we went to play. We hadn't played in forever. We were laughing and I had a great time.
She served me with divorce papers and told me that date was a test to see if she still had feelings for me. I also learned that she was having an affair that started well before our anniversary.
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217points
The expert explained to Bored Panda that couples can feel overwhelmed with work, family life, and other commitments. However, they must do their best to spend time with one another.
“If there is no time for dates, a couple simply needs to focus on making the most of the interactions they have,” he told me. “This means flirting to create sexual tension, complimenting each other more often, using humor, and being more physically affectionate where possible.”
#7
Uh…
My best friend set me up on a blind date straight after my divorce. I was 22(yes, 22 and divorced), and she told me I “needed a good man”. She told me all about how this guy had a good job and he was sooo nice blah, blah, blah. She would NOT tell me how old he was, and would only send me blurry pictures. I felt pressured so I went.
He was no where near as attractive as she had made him out to be, and much, much older than I expected. He looked at me and said, “she didn’t tell you how old I was, did she?”
Anyway, this guy proceeds to drive me around his property, which is huge and beautiful out in the country in TN. He takes me up on a mountain on a four wheeler and proceeds to try to kiss me. I, being terrified I might be murdered out here in the middle of nowhere(he had brought a gun along), let him and it was one of the worst kisses I have ever had. He then took me down off of the mountain to shoot and critiqued my form the entire time. Then he proceeded to absolutely trash his ex wife because she turned out to be a lesbian while walking me around the house they lived in and showing me all of her favorite places and telling me all the things she would do there.
He then showed me the house he was living in with his brother which was basically just a shack.
It was awful. I now tell everyone she tries to set up about this experience, and let them know not to trust her.
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196points
#8
Met a girl on Craigslist (this was a long time ago obviously). After a few messages we set up a date at a bar downtown. I show up and she's already there with a guy friend. No biggie I'm thinking, she's just playing it safe. They are at a two person table and the place is packed. They already have drinks so I grab one for myself and put it on my tab. Her and her friend proceed to ignore me. Like I say something and neither one acknowledges anything unless I ask a direct question. Even then I get one word answers with attitude. So I finish my beer pay my bill and leave without saying a word. Later I get a barrage of messages about how I'm a [jerk] for sticking them with their own tab.
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171points
#9
I went on an online date with this guy when I first moved back home from college...
We met up and I have a habit of telling my parent "i'm going out, I'll be back later" w/o specifics, etc. Anyway, this time, she says "just be careful and if he can't drive, get out the car."
We were en route to our first destination and it was closed. So, he asked me where I wanted to go and I said, "Hooters and bowling." I know, keep it classy right here.
His driving was so reckless... I mean, REALLY bad. Anyway, we ended up going across town because he wanted to take me to this one place. By this time I've determined I'm not into him and I want out, so I just go along with it, maybe we can be friends, right?
His breaks give out and we end up having an accident. We ran into the back of a truck pretty hard and I jerk forward, glasses flying off. After the smoke settles, when I'm nervous, I start laughing. He asks if I'm okay, I said sure and I'm looking for my glasses and he goes, "oh this is bad, really bad." So, I said "Why? No insurance?" He says, No, I have a warrant for my arrest He gets out the car and runs. As he's running into the sunset, he's yelling back at me "i'm really sorry, I can't afford to go to jail again."
The person we hit, leaves. So, I'm the only one there and police show up. I had to call my parent to come pick me up because I have no friends in the area and of course, I gave the cops his info. I knew I wasn't going to talk to him again. The police gave me a ride to a gas station across the street as I was waiting for someone to pick me up. I leaned back, took a picture in the cop car, posted it on Facebook and tagged him in the picture. Somewhere in between the running he found time to get on Facebook and block me.
Bad part about not just the accident, I didn't even get a chance to enjoy Hooters and wings.
164points
According to Dan, some people simply forget that they’re in a romantic relationship. They get stuck in the endless loop of monotony.
“Many couples fall into the trap of just existing around each other, focusing more on their phone or on watching TV, and just expecting that the other person will stick around for life,” the expert said that failing to put in the effort can result in the deterioration of the relationship.
“Eventually, one of them says, ‘We need to talk’ and says that they want to break up, or one of them cheats or lines up a new person before leaving the relationship,” he noted what the potential fallout might be.
#10
Well.. I had a crush on this guy in high school and my friend kept urging me to talk to him. I got the nerve to and apparently he liked me too, or so I thought. We talked often and exchanged notes in the hallway. He asked me to homecoming and I said yes. I was so excited. Bought a new dress and everything!! Got to the football game and met up with my friend. I finally saw my crush and told him I was gonna go sit with him for the game. He’s like “no, you can’t”. I’m like “why?” Him: “Because I’m with my girlfriend!” I was devastated and embarrassed to say the least. Didn’t stay for the rest of game or homecoming. Called my dad and he picked me up in front of the school where I was sitting all by myself.
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157points
#11
My rule was first time meeting someone was usually at a coffee shop or something similar. Some intimate setting to get to know the person better.
Met a girl on Tinder. She seemed very nice and somehow we had a good bit in common, other than she was religious while I am not. She never brought it up in conversation so I didnt think much of it.
Decided to meet her at a Starbucks halfway between our homes. She was nice, but seemed nervous. Thought it was the first date nerves or something. Probably about 15 minutes into talking, another dude who was sitting a few tables near us comes to sit down right next to her. He pulls out a pamphlet with the words like Jesus and Are you lost? written across the top. I'm super confused at this point. I tell the guy "No thanks" and that we didn't have time to hear about it. SHE then begins to tell me that this was her friend and that they wanted to talk to me about where I was in life and how Jesus can help. I think she mentioned something about how today's youth is being corrupted by online dating and how we're straying from God's light. Realized then that I was in a religious interventiom. I was pretty freaked out. I think all I said was something to the effect of "This is [messed] up," then stood up and left. She texted me later to tell me that she was there for me when I was ready to hear God's word.
150points
#12
Years back, in my early twenties, I met this girl online. She seemed nice, geeky, into a lot of the same nerd stuff I was. Cute in her photos too. She dodged me several times about going on an actual date, but finally we set something up. She wanted me to come to her house so she could make dinner, watch a movie; we were both introverts, so that's fine by me.
She said she lived in Houston, but it was actually over an hour outside of it (Which isn't crazy because Houston is yuuuuge). When I got to her 'house' it was actually a trailer in the middle of the woods on a wooded lot full of trash. Turns out they didn't have a trash service, so she basically just threw it outside. I saw cats everywhere, but... It was cats and giant freaking rats.
Still, I'd driven an hour plus, and I was already there, so I climbed up the decrepit deck and knocked on the door. When she opened it, the smell of cat urine poured out of the trailer and invaded my nostrils just as roughly as the Nazis did France.
I get inside.. Cats everywhere. Orange vats, brown cats. Skinny cats, fat cats. Old cats, young cats. Cats everywhere. I knew she lived with her mom, and I got to meet her. She was huge, like.. HUGE. I don't know how the trailer floor held up, and when she got close to me, she smelled like straight up ammonia.
The mom was "cooking dinner" for us, which was like precooked frozen stuff. The girl drug me to her room and attacked me like an animal in heat. I begged off to go to the restroom and the room was covered in cat [poop] and litter. Just box after box, the shower and everything. I couldn't do it.
I went and told her Id forgotten the flowers in my car and drove the f**k away as fast as I could.
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146points
“If you truly love the person you are in a relationship or marriage with, put in a little bit of effort to understand how to have a mutually happy, in love, and attracted relationship and then do it, rather than just letting the relationship die and then getting dumped at some point in future,” he urged all couples to fight for their loved ones, instead of leaving things up to chance.
#13
I went on a date with a girl in college, cutie from my class who I had been trying to get to agree to the date for a while. So I picked her up to drive to dinner, and worth mentioning I lived in Wisconsin and it was January so like -23 outside. Turns out she was bipolar but refused to take any medication for it so she had a manic episode while we were driving, proceeded to undo her belt, open the door, leap out of the car into a snow bank and started running into the woods.
I had to chase her down and convince her to get back in the car with me before she lost her feet to frostbite. We didn't date anymore but I was able to convince her to start her meds and keep on them through all of college, she's actually a pretty successful software engineer now.
Unrelated but that is one of three times a date ended with me in a snowbank on a subzero night.
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142points
#14
A few years ago, I was going through a breakup (a s**tty one..the guy was emotionally abusive..that sorta thing), so I was super excited when this hot guy I met at work asked me out.
He picked me up and told me he really wanted to go see that Twilight movie. So, even though I'm not one of those girls that really got into the Twilight thing, I said sure, fine, lets go see it..(lol).
He didn't mention it was OPENING NIGHT for that movie, so we stood in line for an hour with a ton of teenaged squealing girls. So we're standing in line, and who turns around and makes eye contact with me? My abusive ex-boyfriends b**** sister (who I never liked to begin with, even before the relationship went bad).
We finally get in the theater, get our seats, and who sits RIGHT f**king next to me? Yup, the b**** sister...literally sharing an armrest with the twat.
So, I sit through the movie being bored (I'm not into Twilight..I'm just not), pissed/nervous (sitting next to the b**** sister), and annoyed (because every time the werewolf guy took his shirt off, the girls in the theater would yell "woooOoOO"..).
So when we finally frickin leave, we go back to his place for some drinks. One thing leads to another and he asks me to spend the night. I agreed, even though I didn't really feel like staying there, but I didn't want to drive after drinking. Let me also note that this guy was HORRIBLE in bed. WORST SEX EVER. He was TERRIBLE! And in the morning before he went to work he said "I want you to be here when I get back."
Me: "Well, ok.. We can hang out again, but I want to go home and shower and whatnot..."
Him: "No, don't leave, please? I really want you to be here."
Me: "Ok, ok, I'll stay I guess.." His begging gave me the creepiest vibe at this point...
I wait 10 minutes after he leaves and I bounced and never looked back.
And now he's in jail awaiting trial for murder in LA. It was all over the news a few months ago.
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141points
#15
Went on a date with a guy who seemed really cool. He used to race bikes until he landed on his head after attempting a jump.
During the date he:
Told everyone we were on a date. Everyone.
Told me he wanted to kill his ex roommates.
Asked the waitress to make the date more romantic, so she brought out a giant ice cream sundae (meant for 2 people to share). He ate it all by himself, and spilled ice cream all over himself.
Bragged about beating the world record for the jump on which he landed on his head.
Kept asking me if I was a gold digger, because he makes tons of money and needs to protect himself.
Demanded separate bills (no big deal).
All 4 of his credit cards were declined. Asked me if I didn't mind paying and he would get it next time. (not that there would BE a next time ever)
Told everyone that the date went "splendidly".
Gave me stickers to his welding company as a thank you for paying since his credit cards must have some kind of error.
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140points
#16
I agreed to go on a date with an older coworker from my first job at a supermarket, I was 20 he was 27. He took me to lunch and didn’t let me order for myself; when the waitress came to ask what I wanted to drink he cut me off and placed both my drink and food order (I hadn’t even glanced at the menu yet). He proceeded by saying I needed to meet his mom and brother soon and how we should get married and eventually have kids. Mind you he didn’t know a single thing about me.. I quit shortly after that and he would message me on social media every now and then saying things like my then boyfriend didn’t deserve me until I blocked him everywhere.
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131points
#17
Gay guy here. Went on a date with a guy who seemed and looked pretty nice. He suggested we go to this showing of Rushmore that was part of some week-long Wes Anderson celebration. Now I'm impressed. Not only does he love Wes Anderson films - he's managed to find a Wes Anderson festival in my city - stuff like this isn't that common. I'm excited and think onto a winner. And then the date started.
Ever met one of those really negative people who just enjoy s**tting on everything they don't personally enjoy? Yeah he was one of those. After winning the seat raffle, he tosses the prize to me as if it was a bag of s**t (it was in fact a poster and free Wes Anderson dvd) because he "can't stand this director"...well I hate to break it to you buddy, but um...
Then, added to his general asshattery, he begins to badmouth people he worked with. I get it, we all work with a few nutjobs, but telling me that someone I've never met needs to "die in a diabetic coma" and that you were happy another woman left because you "hated the fat c**t" isn't really the way to go.
Aaaaaaand then he began to be transphobic. Look pal, we're in this LGBT thing together right? How about we stop calling trans people "it" because you think it's funny? Also, what makes you think I don't have trans friends?
Then the movie started. That's right folks, he managed to pack this much nope into the time between walking in and the lights going off. Honestly, if I'd seen Rushmore before, I'd have walked out. But I hadn't and I really wanted to watch it.
The date ended pretty shortly after the movie did. I went home and reevaluated my life and how I talked about other people
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128points
#18
When I was 16 I was willing to go on a date with any boy who was willing because I thought I was missing out on the world's greatest secret. Cue Josh.
Josh was the friend of my best friends boyfriend and we had been set up on a blind double date. We were gonna go to the movies and see that stupid Facebook movie that came out around that time. Best friends boyfriend picks us both up and then we go get Josh. Now josh has decided that he's gonna wear his best outfit for this date which happened to be a bright orange knock off jersey, jnco Jean shorts that were just above his ankles and those douche sunglasses that every s**tty person has. I knew right then and there I made a huge mistake.
He gets in the car and the first thing he says is she isn't as fat as I thought she would be man. He smiles at me and asks my weight because he'd love to bench me sometime. Lolwat. I tell him that's rude to ask a girl and he says sure babe and rolls his eyes. Whatever. we all awkward sit in the car while he makes dumb jokes about blacks and terrorists. When we finally get to the movie he decides now is a good time to tell me he wants to be a navy seal when he grows up. Cool. However that's not exactly how it goes. He tells me he wants to be a navy SEAL. he literally screams the word seal everytime he says it. Everyone is looking and he. Just. Keeps. Saying. It. At this point I want to die.
However we go and find a seat and he immediately spills his drink on me. Keeps telling me to change into his hoodie and it's dark no one will see my bra. I tell him I am fine. I look at my friend and she's making out with her bf. Great. The movie sucked but it was finally time to go home. They decide that we need taco bell so we go to eat and I decide I am not hungry and won't be eating. Josh doesn't like this and proceeds to order me a bunch of food and then expects me to pay him back. When I won't he tells me that he was hoping if ate more food I wouldn't be flat chested. I'm done talking at this point. I want to go home. Which I get not after he harasses me for my number. So I give him a fake. That is until my friend gives him my number.
He texts me constantly about how he's a werewolf inside waiting to eat me, he sends me pictures of his weight bench and tells me that's were he's gonna punch my virgin hole, sends me a picture of his dogs balls, and other creepy random s**t. Not to mention his tag was navy SEALS. I blocked him but the memory lives on forever.
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113points
#19
I was on a first date with a girl I had met through doing some community theatre. We'd gone to the movies to see "Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs." Before the movie, we were chatting and slowly realizing that it definitely wasn't meant to work out. We just had too many conflicting interests and opinions. It made the experience incredibly uncomfortable, especially because we started lightly arguing over things like politics and religion. I was young and I was an idiot.
Anywho, before the movie started I texted another friend of mine to tell her (the friend) how terribly the date was going. And then I heard that fateful sound. Immediately after clicking "send" on my phone, my date's phone chimed. She pulled it out of her purse and read whatever text had come in. She then slowly turned to me and asked...
"Did you MEAN to send that to me?"
I immediately realized and explained that I had just opened up whatever the most recent message in my inbox was and replied to that, with the intention of texting my friend. Or perhaps I'd clicked the wrong name in my contacts list (they both were the only names beginning with M in my phone.) Needless to say, she was pretty upset.
I explained that, despite our differences I really enjoyed her company. I really did, because she was brilliant and beautiful. Certainly out of my league. So we continued the date as friends which was more awkward than we had anticipated.
After the movie, we went our separate ways. When I got back to my apartment, I texted that same friend again about how that date was incredibly uncomfortable and I doubted that there would be a follow up.
My phone chimes.
"You sent it to me again."
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112points
#20
Tinder date. She looked nothing like her picture while not ugly just completely different. Picked the worst restaurant in town which I looked past because everyone has different taste. we came back to my house and complained about not showing affection or touching her so I started touching her and then got mad about ohhh wanting a hook up which I didn’t, but the final straw was when she decided she didn’t like my house which I had just bought and was Proud of. she immediately wanted to go to home depot to buy stuff to start remodeling. It was by far my worst and weirdest date and I hope she found a house to remodel.
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110points