#1
#2
And when she did, it was the most insincere stuff ever. "It's no big deal, everyone else thinks it's ok!" and stuff like that. Suffice to say, I got my butt outta that relationship AND friendship group real quick.
#3
She had forgotten to delete a message from a guy saying "All we ever do is sleep together, can't we hang out some time?"
There was nothing on my phone.
But why do people cheat?
The simple answer: when your partner cares more about themselves and their needs than about connecting with you or the relationship, trouble usually follows.
Being an adult means understanding the difference between right and wrong — you wouldn’t eat a chocolate cake every morning for breakfast, in the same way you wouldn’t spend all your money on lottery tickets.
It’s common sense to resist instant pleasure because you know it comes at a cost.
#4
#5
#6
It's horrible to deal with at the time, but honestly, it's such a relief to be rid of such a toxic mess.
But maturity in relationships is more nuanced. It goes beyond just controlling yourself — you don’t avoid cheating on someone just because it’s wrong or you might get caught.
But maturity in relationships goes beyond just controlling yourself — a mature person doesn’t avoid cheating on someone just because it’s wrong or they might get caught.
You wouldn’t do it because you know that your actions won’t just affect you, but also the other person involved. It’s about self-awareness and responsibility, and valuing your partner’s trust because faithfulness is about choice, not an obligation.
#7
At 4.30am she got up out of bed and said she was going to pick her brother up from a party. Covid lockdown had just ended so everyone was partying. We have 2 young kids so we didn't go out. She comes home just over an hour later and jumps into bed wearing racey underwear, which was the opposite of what she went to bed wearing (married men will understand!).
I woke up with the kids at 7 and the whole situation didn't sit right with me. I took the dash cam footage from the car and loaded it onto the computer. There it was, clear as day, some dude who did not look like her brother at all was thankful she came to pick him up and they flirted in the car for a bit before dropping him off at his house.
It was difficult to watch but when I confronted her she broke down and confessed. 2 weeks later and the car was sold, 6 weeks after that the house was sold, a year later and were divorced.
It was a tough point of my life but thank god for that dashcam! Saved me wasting more time of my life with a woman that didn't value me as much as I valued her! I've now moved on with an absolutely fantastic woman and I have my life back (but better!).
#8
#9
While there can be several reasons for infidelity, therapists say that one common cause is disconnection.
“One of the biggest reasons people cheat is the feeling that you and your partner have drifted. Perhaps the relationship has become stale and predictable and one partner is feeling trapped, looking for an escape,” Naomi Light, a relationship coach and couples therapist, writes on her blog.
She also says that sometimes people can sabotage what they have consciously or unconsciously as a way of avoiding commitment and rejecting feelings of responsibility.
According to her, people also cheat when they have low self-esteem issues, or when they no longer feel cherished and accepted in their relationship.
#10
I confronted her, she confessed. But I knew there had to be more. Exactly a week later, she came home from a doctor’s appointment. She had chlamydia. Which she didn’t get from me. She tried to justify it by saying monogamy “didn’t work for her.” It sure as hell worked for me. That’s why she’s my ex-wife.
#11
#12
It was a great way to come back from vacation.
Being cheated on can leave lasting scars, and trust probably won’t be the same, while any healing will take a long time.
There are also more complex emotional and psychological effects of feeling betrayed.
Some people may find it challenging to trust any subsequent future partners, while others will question their worth and attractiveness making them less confident.
A study found that almost 45% of adults who experienced a partner’s infidelity showed symptoms similar to those of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
People reported having symptoms such as flashbacks, hypervigilance, avoidance, panic, and intrusive thoughts.
#13
I was standing right there and we’d been dating for two years at that point.
#14
One day I noticed a strange email address on the office computer. Her first name and a different last name. I realized that email was still logged in so I took a peek.
I found 2 years worth of emails between my ex and some dude she dated before me. So I printed out every email and had it bound in a binder ready to present to my divorce lawyer.
#15
One of the best ways to deal with the impact of infidelity is seeking counselling or therapy. Professional help goes a long way, especially if the situation affects you for a long time.
If you’re not sure that you want to break up with your partner after they cheated on you, you still feel you love them and want to stay with them, couples counselling is the way to go.
It can also involve social support, rebuilding trust and renegotiating boundaries within the relationship.
#16
Got a random text on Insta asking if I am OP and knew “X”
Responded saying yes. She literally replied saying “congrats, your girlfriend is sleeping with my boyfriend” followed by a barrage of screenshots she had gotten from her boyfriends phone.
#18
But there are some DIY methods in case you decide to end the relationship after the betrayal.
Start with prioritizing yourself. You can only communicate your needs and boundaries with someone else once you spend some quality time with yourself, learn to love yourself and try to understand yourself.
Stop thinking about the past, and obsessing over the person who cheated on you or going over reasons why it happened. Every time you rethink the relationship, you disconnect with yourself.
Setting yourself proper goals, whether it’s as small as getting out of bed at a particular time or as big as working towards your dream life.
Journaling, meditating, exercising, taking up a new hobby are some other ways to help recover from a messy relationship.
#19
My son told me, and I filed for divorce. My husband claims it wasn't an affair because they didn't sleep together. I say it was an affair and filed for divorce two days later. And including my son was another form of jerk. That's his child, not his buddy. He was supposed to protect him from the ugly in the world, even if that ugly was him.
#20
