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Redditor u/LiterallyEkam revealed to Bored Panda the inspiration behind their question on r/AskReddit that netted them over 66.2k upvotes. They saw an incredibly bizarre situation while visiting a friend and this got them thinking about how we all see things very differently.
“The event that inspired me to post the question was when I saw something I would not consider normal at a friend's house. I saw my friend kiss his dog on the lips and when I asked him about it he thought it was something other people did normally,” they told me.
Obviously, the redditor found this behavior very weird (and odds are that many of you Pandas do, too). “I had seen others kiss their dog but not directly on the lips in the way I saw. I found this peculiar and I wanted to find out if others have had similar experiences.”
According to Ekam, they never expected their thread to get so popular. “I didn't think there would be many people who had such interesting stories,” they complimented their fellow Reddit users for being honest and sharing their experience with everyone else.
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I was very curious to get Ekam’s take on why people don’t recognize peculiar behaviors for what they are and what we can do to take a more objective glance at our own daily habits.
In Ekam’s view, it’s all about building habits that we no longer think about. “I think that people grow up seeing and doing these behaviors which they perceive as normal because they are used to it,” they told me, adding that some folks might simply not have been taught that it’s something other people do.
Ekam said that expanding our social circle and experiencing different lifestyles can help us get a different perspective on our own lives. “The only way to be self-aware of our quirks is to spend more time around other people and learn their behaviors.”
Just because we’re different, however, doesn’t mean that we should automatically aim to readjust to what we see as ‘normal’ and usual. Doing so would mean that we’d give up what makes us unique. What makes us individuals. What makes us… well, ‘us.’
“I don't think people should aim to iron out their quirks. It's what makes us different, and unless it's damaging to others, we should accept each other for it,” Ekam said that the only habits we should consider changing are the ones that actually harm others.
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However, at the end of the day, we really should be putting our own comfort and happiness first, not that of our guests and acquaintances. At least according to relationship and dating expert Dan Bacon, from The Modern Man project. Recently, he told me that it’s impossible to please everyone with the way you have your home designed and organized, so instead of stressing about this, we should be unapologetically ourselves.
"A man’s home is part of what people initially use to judge his social status and character. However, how he behaves and acts with the people who come over to his place says so much more about him," Dan told Bored Panda that our homes and how we act greatly contribute to how people look at us.
"A man might have a perfectly tidy, well-designed, and stylish home, but be very nervous and try too hard to impress people who come over. So, rather than seeing him as a cool, confident, successful man they can admire and look up to, most people just perceive him as a nervous, insecure guy with a nice place. Alternatively, they may see him as a guy who tries hard to please others with material things because he's insecure about himself and doesn't feel good enough in their eyes,” Dan explained to Bored Panda.
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Part of being a good host, however, means letting others speak. We shouldn’t be hogging all of the attention when we have guests over. "Remember that most people care more about themselves than other people. So, allow people to talk about themselves, rather than always trying to be the center of attention,” the expert said.
"Also remember to not try to oversell yourself or your place, to hopefully gain people’s approval. Be confident and secure in who you are as a person and let your surroundings provide additional clues about who you are and how you approach life."
The expert stressed the fact that we should always do whatever we want when it comes to our homes. We have to feel happy where we live, not focus on trying to impress everyone. So while some people might thrive only in tidy and perfectly clean environments, others can be confident in more of a messy home.
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"If you enjoy placing a lot of importance on your home because it means a lot to you, then do that. If you only see it as a place to live and want to focus your attention on other things, you should do that. You can never impress or please everyone, no matter what you do. Just look at celebrities as an example. They have millions of people who love them and millions who hate them,” Dan said.
"The same applies to your home. You will never make it, furnish it or arrange it in a way where everyone loves you for it and wishes they had it. Some people will love it, others will like it and some will hate it. So, just enjoy doing what you want to do. That’s the only way you’ll truly be happy."
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