50 People Share If They Regret Their Decision On Having Kids Or Being Childfree

my children are the best thing in my life (i have a great career as well, many friends). they’ve brought me through many a bad moment, and now that they’re all doing well, i bask in their successes.

and in the love of my grandchildren and my great-grandson. many many blessings.

No, not in the least bit. I feel like fatherhood injected a meaning into my life that it didn't have before. I utterly adore my two sons. My marriage failed, but it was worth it just for the fact that it gave me them. I am continuously thankful for them.

How a person reacts to becoming a parent is hard to predict. It really isn't for everyone. Some people who think they want it end up hating it, and some who are wary of it end up loving it. I was more on the wary side, but after getting married, we wanted kids. Once my first son came, I transformed. Everything became about him. When my second son came, it was ever more love.

I've been raising them as a single parent for many years now, and i consider it to be the most important part of my identity.

Now that my kids are growth and having kids of their own, I am enormously happy to have had them. Now I can enjoy them as parents and enjoy my grandchildren as the wonderful kids they are.

I genuinely do not know.

I’ve never wanted kids. I like them (my favorite job yet was as a science education intern at the Oregon Museum of Science and Industry), but I’ve always preferred to be the “aunt”, able to hand them back to their parents when they need discipline or when their time with me is done. I’m not sure I’d be a great mom, either, having chronic illness that saps my energy.

But I’m also trans. And I get pregnancy dysphoria. It hurts that I can’t get pregnant.

Would I have a different opinion if I’d been born with a uterus, or if I were a decade or two younger and could look forward to a uterus transplant? I can’t say. It’s not a hypothetical I can really game out. Too much would be different. Maybe I would have come to the same conclusion. Maybe much of my aversion to having kids of my own is the desire to bear them myself. Maybe if I were the one carrying them for nine months I’d be willing to make the sacrifices necessary.

As it is, I think it’s for the best that I didn’t. But there are too many “What ifs?” to truly say I don’t regret it.

I regret that I was not mentally stable enough to understand someone like me shouldn't have children. I love my children dearly, and tried my best, but my failings unfortunately left them almost as scarred as I was at the tender early adult years they're at, from basically marrying my abuser in a different person, unknowingly exposing them to just as terrible a person. I believe in reincarnation and feel they would have been better off with someone else. However, I'm not sad they exist. And maybe having a shit mother is a lesson they needed in this lifetime, if my beliefs are true.

My oldest has the huntingtons gene though. I DO regret having him, because I know what's coming now that I did my research. I know it's not going to be pretty, and id rather have death by a thousand cuts and broken bones than watch him suffer. He didn't deserve this and certainly doesn't deserve what's coming.

I never wanted children. I never wanted to be married, either.

I had always disliked children, especially OTHER children when I was a child. They were loud, cruel, misbehaved, and selfish. That was my belief since age three, when I was constantly traumatized by horrible children.

I had a very difficult life. I had multiple instances of being assaulted, being disparaged, and being kept from opportunity because of my sex. The one thing I feared most was depending on a man for—anything.

So, I got married young and had children. Haha. True story.

I do not regret either. Yes I depend on my husband. BUT—I don’t NEED to depend on him. That seems to be a subtle difference, but really it isn’t. I choose to depend on him. Yes, I love my children. It turns out that loud, cruel, ignorant kids are MADE, not born. Teach and raise your children differently, you get a different result. Also, they are very bright, fortunately—this means I never needed to have the patience of a saint to teach them. Because I don’t have the patience of a saint.

BUT—and I knew this prior to making my life choices—my career was damaged by raising my own children. I am going to say something that may sound obnoxious or arrogant, but it is true: When we as a society punish the most intelligent, most conscientious, the most pro-civic women when they reproduce—and make no mistake, women who breed are punished with VERY serious consequences to our ability to gain academic, career, political, and intellectual recognition or advancement—we are screwing over our society and our gene pool. We must stop punishing women for reproducing. That “career gap” or that derailment of the “academic track” is costing society big time.

No I do not regret having children. But more importantly, YOU won’t regret my children. Because they are poised to save your life (son), and save your business (daughter) and we must have competent young people or society is gone. When smart women decide not to breed, we will have consequences.

It is my biggest regret in life. First wife and I tried but were not successful. This perhaps contributed to our divorce. That, along with her screwing her ex boyfriend lol. Second wife and I been married 25 years. When we got married, she wanted to wait. Her two sons were 8, 10. I guess she waited too long and now we both too old.

Will always be my biggest regret. I have a great relationship with older stepson. Younger one a useless POS. Glad I had them, really one in my life but just not the same.

I was considered the least likely to marry, be a homemaker, or have kids of the three of us girls in my family. I wasn’t much of a homebody and I love traveling. I also wasn’t very stable in terms of relationships or staying in college or keeping a job. But, at 23, I made the decision to settle down and have a family. I turned out to have two birth children and an adopted son and I was not only a stay-at-home mom and a homebirther and a La Leche Leader (breastfeeding instructor) but I then homeschooled my children all the way through high school. Go figure; best decision I ever made.

There was one moment when I really though I had made a mistake, though. I had gotten pregnant (planned) with my first child and I loved being pregnant. But, as I hit my nine month, I become frightened that I would not enjoy having a child. I had been the baby of my family and, quite frankly, other people’s kids rather annoyed me. One day I ran into this Greek man in a store who raved about my being a glowing pregnant woman and said how excited I must be that soon I would be a mother. I looked at him rather glumly, so he said, “Oh, but just think how you will enjoy brushing your little girl’s hair!” (I didn’t know I was going to have a girl). I looked at him like he was insane because I hated even brushing my own hair. Then, I had my baby and as I held her in my arms for the first time, I fell madly in love. Of course, the poor child never had well-brushed hair (unless her dad or auntie did the job), but all else about having a child worked out well.

Getting married and becoming a mother and a homemaker grounded me, gave me purpose, and the happiness of a family and a home. I did end up divorced after the children were grown and moved on to two different careers, but my life as a mother was truly worth its weight in gold and I still have three lovely children to share my life with. I feel very fortunate.

Yes i totally regretted for almost six months.

As I am mother of twins, they came in 8th month and where in NICU foe almost 15 days and they came home with food pipe. I was asked feed every 2 hours. New mom, no parents and twins and old in laws all came together.

Was not able to sleep no rest huge amount of money spent. Physically and mentally I was so stressed. Postpartum depression hit me very hard I always regretted having twins. As first 4 month they didn't sleep they easily get infected to diseases. No rest in life.

But yes after they turned 6 month they gave some relieve to me and now my whole day revolves around them. I love them like hell. I waited for 6 years for them. Took 100 of injection to give them lyf. It's easy to say twins get bigger together but it's very difficult to upbring twins.

But I love each n every moment with them. Soon they will be 8 months old.

My daughter turns 4 years next month.

These 4 years have been overwhelming but absolutely splendid.

Where to begin with, initially it was indeed difficult to comprehend on how to raise my kiddo. But slowly it all settled in.

I have a companion who loves me unconditional ly, she cares for me like no one else, if I shed a tear will say mumma what's wrong everything is good, she will come running to me once I am back from office. I actually everyday look forward to her reaction when I reach home. She literally jumps with joy. And that's the joy that makes me forget all the fatigue and stress of the day.

We do our make up together, we share our day ( offcourse mine only in the context that's relevant to her), we say each other stories, generally I take her with me when I go to meet my friends, we laugh together.

And yes though tough at times I have never regretted having her she is the best thing to happen. She has been nothing but my sunshine. She has bought more love and joy and I would not want it any other way.