To learn more about how to stay off such lists and what to do in order to stay grounded, we contacted Dr. Mike Brooks, a licensed psychologist based in Austin, Texas as well as F. Diane Barth, LCSW, who is a psychotherapist and psychoanalyst in private practice in New York City.
"A purpose in life is to learn, grow, and improve. We cannot do this unless we first recognize and admit our mistakes," Dr. Brooks, the author of 'Tech Generation: Raising Balanced Kids in a Hyper-Connected World,' told Bored Panda.
"We must remind ourselves that to 'err is human,' and we are fulfilling a purpose in life every time we admit our mistakes. Thus, from this perspective, mistakes are opportunities for growth that allow us to fulfill life's purpose. Moreover, a natural byproduct of growth and improvement is greater levels of happiness."
Dr. Brooks said that refusing to recognize and admit our mistakes when we are wrong hinders our growth and drowns us in disharmony. "This also increases the chances that we, and others, will suffer because when we don't learn from our mistakes, we are more likely to repeat them."
"When we don't admit when we are wrong, we create rifts in our relationships, which are the very source of our own happiness. In essence, we shoot ourselves in the foot," the psychologist explained.
"When it comes to relationships, in particular, it is better to be effective than to be right."
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Diane Barth agrees that not acknowledging your mistakes can damage your relationships. "Over the years in my work as a psychotherapist, I've almost never seen a relationship destroyed because someone made a mistake," the author of I Know How You Feel: The Joy and Heartbreak of Friendship in Women's Lives said. "But I've seen many destroyed when someone who made a mistake refused to admit it."
Moreover, if people stop trusting you, you put not only your personal relationships in jeopardy but other aspects of life, such as work, as well.
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Some people, however, seem completely incapable of admitting their mistakes. For example, Dr. Brooks highlighted that wars have taken millions of lives, yet those in power still haven't admitted they could've changed course and prevented it.
"People have trouble admitting they are wrong for many reasons but one of the main ones has to do with ego and attachment. When we attach our sense of self to a mental position and take the stance, 'I am right', it becomes part of our identity, part of our ego."
"'I am right' is almost like saying, 'I am Mike' or whatever your name is. Now, my ego, or sense of self, has become attached to a mental position. A primitive 'fight/flight/freeze' survival mechanism kicks in to defend my 'rightness' as if I were defending my very life. It's like a little part of me will die if I were to admit that I am wrong," the psychologist said.
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"[If that turns out to be the case, I] feel like I am diminished, in a way, and you, the person in the 'right,' are now superior to me. This is really hard for my ego to take, so I defend myself [and] my 'rightness,' at all costs. Even when this causes great suffering," Dr. Brooks continued.
"The suffering of me admitting that I am wrong is worse than the consequences that come from not admitting that I am wrong, at least in my head. This perspective, which is inspired by Buddhist psychology, is an example of why various attachments are often at the root of suffering."
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