Let’s be real: we’ve all thought at least once about running away to join the circus. Not literally (although we’re not judging if that’s your thing) but in the sense of just ghosting society and starting a completely new life where nobody knows your (real) name.
Someone asked the internet, “People who have "disappeared" to start a new life as a new person, what was it like and do you regret doing it?”, and an online community didn't hold back with their stories. Tuck into this collection of the wildest.
More info: Reddit
#21
My fiance and I grew up in the same hometown and went to the same high school. He was really ridiculously popular and so was his sister, who was in my grade, and I wasn't. I was the girl raised in a barn, basically. But I had a huge crush on him and his sister and all her friends made fun of me and made my life hell. So after he got back from the Marines we started dating (much to their dismay) and they were amazed that I turned into this "gorgeous freak" after HS (their words) and we moved in together like right away because I was the girl raised in a barn and he wanted to give me a better life than that. So here we are, 3.5 hours away and 3 1/2 years later, engaged, with a guinea pig (so it's real serious) and his sister's friends are so pissed that I got "their man". Neither of us have Facebook and I only keep in touch with a friend from Massachusetts and he only keeps in touch with his Aunt and a few select friends of his who like me too. Nobody knows a thing about me.
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7points
#22
What was it like? You can't escape your personality. Where ever you move, you are still the same person with the same habits, you will attract or repel the same people.
While this can be changed by actively wanting too, a simple location change will not do it.
Source: just moved 3000kms / 1700miles for a fresh start.
While this can be changed by actively wanting too, a simple location change will not do it.
Source: just moved 3000kms / 1700miles for a fresh start.
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6points
#23
I didn't fake my death or officially get a new identity, but I disappeared from my life 2 years ago. I started going by my first-middle name and I got the hell out of an 8-year long horrible relationship. I went into a shelter, joined an "Address Confidentiality Program" and only moved about 3 hours away and I've been MIA with my kid ever since. I am close with my family and a few childhood friends but my life from those 8 years is completely dead. My kid's donor and his entire family haven't seen or heard from us since. I am in therapy and I have been diagnosed with PTSD as a result of those 8 years of hell. I often worry that he's found us but he's in jail now so I'm doing a lot better. I'm still waiting for him to be formally charged and sentenced from a slew of charges from the last incident. My life is much better now. I just started working a few weeks ago. Finally, things are starting to fall into place.
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6points
#24
Throwaway account. I started a new life almost a decade ago. I grew up in a family that wasn't very close. There wasn't really mistreatment but there wasn't really love either. I was pretty unhappy. After high school, I was so lost. I didn't have any friends and I sunk into a depression. I had always known that I was gay but it was then that I realized that I was transgendered. My parents were very judgmental and we weren't close at all so I knew I could never tell them, and could never live the kind of life I knew would finally make me happy. I daydreamed about faking my death and starting over all the time until I finally reached a point where I knew I had to do it. The morning of the day I did it, I walked around my house one last time looking at everything, pet my cat that I'd had for as long as I could remember one last time, and saw my parents for the last time, and told them goodbye as I left that day. I don't want to go into details about how I faked my death but I did it in a way that there didn't need a body to be found. All I had was an envelope full of money and a photo I knew no one would know was missing. I travelled to the closest big city and stayed with someone I had talked to online while I got on my feet. There were a couple quick news reports about the incident but none of them showed my photo. I got all new fake ID and everything. A year after getting a job and my own place, I started HRT therapy. I've been on it for 7 years. I'm a lot happier than I used to be in some ways but I'm still unhappy in other ways. For the first couple of years I didn't feel bad about starting over and what my parents would think, but I started to and it's been getting worse ever since. One day I was walking to work and I walked past my parents on the street. They must've been visiting for some reason. It really shook me up and I called in sick for the day. It was surreal to see them again. They had aged so much. It made me wonder what they must've thought about me, if they missed me, what they were doing now. I realized I did love them in some way. I walked right past them and they didn't even see me. That hurt too, as weird as it sounds. Sometimes I think about just ending my life because everything is just so messed up.
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4points
#25
I'm Bipolar I. I've travelled all over the country trying to re-invent myself multiple times.
What I can tell you is that in my experience, while each and every individual action I still firmly believe was the correct strategic decision, and it brought me to where I am now, where I have ended up is at making peace with my circumstances and my family.
It took a long time, and several such events (and returns from them), before I built a strong enough identity and personality that I no longer felt external emotional pressure weigh on me. Once I got to a point where I knew what was important to me, and I knew what I was willing to do for it, and what I wasn't, I didn't have to move away anymore. I could make a new life in the same place any time I wanted.
I tackled the relationship problems that plagued my life. Some people, I just had to let go completely. Others, I have very, very methodically educated and repaired relationships with (my father, in particular). I never thought that I would make peace with my father, nor that he would ever be a person worth being around. A***e had happened, and I had every reason to expect it to continue indefinitely. Eventually, cirumstances allowed for me to stand my ground and draw a firm line in the sand that absolutely cannot be crossed under any circumstances without severe ramifications. My father knows that I have absolutely no tolerance for hostility of any kind. I just don't allow negativity in my life. I punish it visciously with logic. That, and I practiced Muay Thai and Jiu-Jitsu for a while, which grants me the confidence that he will absolutely never be able to physically control me.
And now we honestly have a great relationship. We're friends. We talk about everything, and we're smiling the whole time. I'm still always waiting for him to snap, but it hasn't happened in a long time.
It worked out for me that I was able to build a new life in a new place, but with a few of the same old people. I know this doesn't work for every situation, but I would encourage anyone looking to re-invent themselves to consider that things like names and friends aren't actually part of your internal identity; the strategies you employ to respond to the world around you are the best definition of your identity. They are simple, they are algorithms, they can be learned, and they can be improved.
What I can tell you is that in my experience, while each and every individual action I still firmly believe was the correct strategic decision, and it brought me to where I am now, where I have ended up is at making peace with my circumstances and my family.
It took a long time, and several such events (and returns from them), before I built a strong enough identity and personality that I no longer felt external emotional pressure weigh on me. Once I got to a point where I knew what was important to me, and I knew what I was willing to do for it, and what I wasn't, I didn't have to move away anymore. I could make a new life in the same place any time I wanted.
I tackled the relationship problems that plagued my life. Some people, I just had to let go completely. Others, I have very, very methodically educated and repaired relationships with (my father, in particular). I never thought that I would make peace with my father, nor that he would ever be a person worth being around. A***e had happened, and I had every reason to expect it to continue indefinitely. Eventually, cirumstances allowed for me to stand my ground and draw a firm line in the sand that absolutely cannot be crossed under any circumstances without severe ramifications. My father knows that I have absolutely no tolerance for hostility of any kind. I just don't allow negativity in my life. I punish it visciously with logic. That, and I practiced Muay Thai and Jiu-Jitsu for a while, which grants me the confidence that he will absolutely never be able to physically control me.
And now we honestly have a great relationship. We're friends. We talk about everything, and we're smiling the whole time. I'm still always waiting for him to snap, but it hasn't happened in a long time.
It worked out for me that I was able to build a new life in a new place, but with a few of the same old people. I know this doesn't work for every situation, but I would encourage anyone looking to re-invent themselves to consider that things like names and friends aren't actually part of your internal identity; the strategies you employ to respond to the world around you are the best definition of your identity. They are simple, they are algorithms, they can be learned, and they can be improved.
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4points
