35 Engaged Couples Who Never Made It To The Altar For Wild And Sometimes Heartbreaking Reasons

There might be various external factors that change a couple’s plans of getting married, as seen in the answers; however, breaking off the engagement often is a person’s choice. After a little research, the key aspects of the topic seem to come down to this not being easy, as one might be sure the relationship is over and still be scared of hurting their partner or disappointing family and friends, yet necessary and quite urgent in cases when a person is sure about the partnership not being right for them.

In his article for Psychology Today, Gary W. Lewandowski discussed a recent study that asked 30 participants a similar question about the reasons behind breaking off their engagement. Research participants were individuals who broke off their serious, long-term relationships and the dominant theme was that the impending wedding was a catalyst for thinking more deeply and intentionally about the relationship’s future.

For some, it was thinking about certain behavior of their partner and asking themselves whether this was what they wanted “for the rest of their life”. Others similarly were prompted by the engagement to visualize the future together more vividly and they didn’t like what they saw.

Some interviewees draw their attention to various incompatibilities with their partner that won’t go away after getting married and would be problematic going forward, such as abuse, communication issues, or different takes on having kids. Finally, many recognized the role of inertia and sought to find ways to slow the momentum toward marriage.

Bored Panda was curious about what prompted the author to ask people about their experience of getting engaged but never tying the knot. We got in touch with the r/mimi_nivi and she kindly agreed to answer our questions. The woman shared that it was “kind of weird reasoning”, as she was thinking about the man who used to be her boss and that she has been crushing on for a year.

The man is older and has never been married, but was engaged once. So this prompted the woman to think about why that was the case. She also explained that even though she doesn’t work for him anymore, she could otherwise ask him; however, they are not that close.

We also wished to know whether the author has an answer to this question herself and she shared she hasn’t been engaged but she has known a couple of people who were.

These included her former boss — whose story behind the engagement she doesn’t know — and her old friend. The latter is married now but was once engaged and left at the altar: “She couldn’t marry him and left.”

Finally, we asked for the author’s take on whether there might be a bright side to breaking off the engagement, and this is what she had to say: “I think there is. I think going through the heartbreak of ending an engagement is a lot better than ending a marriage in divorce. Divorce is bitter no matter how amicable it is between spouses.”

“You shouldn’t marry someone if you know deep down that it’s not going to work between you two. You shouldn’t marry someone for the wrong reasons. Too many people have done that and they’re either in loveless marriages or they end up divorced. That’s not right for any party involved.”

Do you have such an experience of being engaged and not going through with the wedding? Please, share your thoughts in the comments.