Hayley Quinn, who has given an excellent TED talk titled 'Searching for love to escape ourselves', told Bored Panda that your initial text doesn't have to be too complicated.
"A first message should be a short, playful hello that is (where possible) personalized to someone's profile," Quinn said.
"Personalized messages will always outperform a more bland 'hey, how's it going?'. Messages that are humourous or silly often work well too. People don't want a factual exchange, they want to get a sense of your personality from the message you send."
"For example, if someone's into yoga, don't say, 'how long have you been doing that?' Instead, you could say, 'I hope the ability to do a headstand isn't a prerequisite for a first date?' or 'Could I convince you to ditch the yoga mat and come for a hike instead?'" the dating coach explained.
"Keep your messages short and whatever you do, don't ask someone out for a date on the first message you send!"
"The person you message might have 10 other messages they've received that day," Quinn noted. "Because of that if your message is too bland, it could get lost in the shuffle."
"The name of the game here is to be somewhat unique and back up what you send with a well-constructed profile. The next stage of the conversation is also important. Ask someone out too soon and they will feel like you're jumping to the next step before you've established a connection; ask someone out too late and the conversation might fizzle. Keep the momentum high in your conversations and if you're both not ready for a date yet, try having an in-app phone or video call instead," the dating coach recommended.
However, before you get the chance to talk, you first need to charm your potential date with your profile.
"People have high expectations for a dating app profile, including Instagram-quality photos plus a well-written, short and witty [introduction]," Quinn said.
"The written part of your online dating profile is less about sharing factual information (i.e. what you do) and more about someone getting an instant sense of your personality when they read it," she added.
"If the app offers the ability to add a voice note as well, this could prove to be an easy win for you. Recent research from Match showed that 17% of people saying they could tell if they were attracted to someone by the sound of their voice alone."
"Finally, when it comes to your pictures, avoid some obvious mistakes: poor lighting, too many group shots, cluttered backgrounds, or anything that makes it hard to see what you actually look like," the dating coach said.
