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My youngest has changed their name when they came out as non binary, and it felt right from the start. It's not a name/style I would have picked, but I never had any trouble adjusting, it just clicked straight away.
Their deadname was a lovely name but I cringe whenever I hear it now. That's not my kid!
Funny thing is, when I was pregnant with my daughter she came to me in a dream and told me her name, so that's what I went with. When I was pregnant with my youngest I had a dream about a kid, and I asked what their name was, and they responded with "just pick one, it doesn't matter".
In retrospect it feels like they told me it didn't matter because they were always planning on picking their own name when they were ready. It was never supposed to be more than a temporary name.
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For many parents, the name they give their child seems fine until the baby arrives. Then, comments from family members, friends, and sometimes even strangers begin. Parents may start to see that, although unique, the name they've picked isn't all that they thought it would be. The disappointment is real – months of research and planning result in disappointment and heartbreak.
Sometimes, a name suddenly might become associated with something bad if the baby's famous namesake becomes infamous. For example, fewer parents are willing to name their kids after celebrities. Names like Rihanna, Kourtney, Donald, Zayn, Kylie, Miley, and others are becoming names that parents avoid when picking monikers for their children.
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Edit: to clarify, I’m not saying I have a Latin name, my name is literally the word Latina.
Luckily, there are ways out. Some parents choose to change their baby's name a few weeks or months after they're born. In fact, according to a 2019 survey by Channel Mum, 20% of parents who weren't happy with their kids' names call them by a nickname or a different name altogether. And 14% have considered legally changing their names.
Some cultures have solved this conundrum by using "temporary" names and nicknames upon birth. In China, for example, a baby is given a "milk name," a familial nickname before birth. As time goes by, the milk name might be forgotten as the real first name takes its place. But it's a good chance for the family to see if the name the parents picked sticks.
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If parents realize they don't like their baby's name after they're born and have already been named, they most likely need to act fast. Pamela Redmond Satran, co-founder of Nameberry.com, told TODAY.com that the cutoff for changing a child's name is around one year. Another important element is not to get stuck overthinking.
"Sometimes I want to say to parents, 'Just pick something!'" Satran said. "Whether you name her Jennifer or Gentry or Eugenia, it's not really going to determine how good her life is. You can overthink it too, because every name has advantages and disadvantages, and it can really be impossible."
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Also, I was adopted too and they decided not to change my name. It's Mariel, but when I went to college people started calling me "Ellie" for short. My sister and I are now Kelly and Ellie. Our mother hates this.
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On the other hand, many parents feel as if they have to bow to external pressure to rename their kids. Granted, some names can really be inappropriate, like one girl's name on this list that sounds like an adults-only product. However, it should also be said that sometimes, a baby's name is the parents' business, not anybody else's. If they like the name and don't regret it, they should be able to go about their lives without receiving demeaning comments and criticism from friends and family members.
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The baby was born, he named it Jordan Jordan, but as they were checking out of the hospital the paperwork so confused the billing person and took so long to sort out that he immediately changed the first name to something reasonable.
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Younger child we gave a girl a more common boy name. It works, she likes it enough, despite’s years of people reading it and saying “he” until they knew. This bit us back in a humorous way last year. We had a new calf born while she was home. We asked for names. She suggested Daisy. “Well it’s a boy” “you named me —————-“. Ah, yup. We have bull named Daisy. :D.
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Certified nurse-midwife, pediatric nurse, and founder of Gathered Birth, Diana Spalding, CNM, is a big believer in not saying anything at all. Even when you don't like someone else's baby name. "You are not going to like everyone's baby name decisions and that's okay. But please, keep your opinions about other people's baby name choices to yourself," she writes.
"When a parent tells you their baby name choice, tell them you love it, or don't say anything at all. 'I can't wait to meet them' is always a lovely thing to say! Anything negative and hurtful needs to be kept to yourself."
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My son, on the other hand, his first name is Donald. It's not what he goes by, but I feel like it's about to become cumbersome.
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What about you, Pandas? Have you ever been mad at your parents for the name they chose for you? Did you ever consider changing it? Let us know in the comments!
And if you're looking for some baby name drama stories, check out this one where a dad saves his son from a lifetime of ridicule by giving him a regular name, and this one where the name 'Luna' made the dad's Christian family uncomfortable.
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