We usually think of Christmas as a cozy and cheerful holiday spent with our loved ones. For a lot of people, this is the time to sip wine by the fire, reflect on the past year and enjoy tons of merry and warm moments that come along the way. However, thousands of moms and dads place too much pressure on themselves to create the perfect celebration for their kids, which can lead to burnout.
From running through the stores looking for the most-wanted toy of the year to planning dinners and thinking about how to entertain your guests during the parties, this time of the year can cause a significant amount of stress. If you ever tried to balance your everyday routine with additional holiday tasks and keep the magical holiday secrets hidden from the children, you know it’s hard.
Plus, it’s no secret that kids are demanding. As a parent who has to deal with their requests, your stress levels can get pretty high. But if you want to stay sane and enjoy this Christmas time, there are a few tips and tricks you could try. American Psychological Association suggests some healthy and long-lasting techniques parents can use to make the holiday stress a bit more manageable.
First, strengthening social connections can help you in handling a variety of challenges. This is the time to think about the positive people in your life, because "accepting help and support from those who care about us can help alleviate stress." Lowering your anxiety will let you keep your mind and body healthy, which in turn will help you deal with stressful situations and tackle them with a calm and clear head.
Another important piece of advice would be setting realistic expectations for holiday gifts and activities. Don’t try to tick off every single thing on your Christmas to-do list, rather identify the most important tasks and think about steps that are needed to accomplish them.
Just remember, the holiday season is actually short: "We can ask ourselves, what’s the worst thing that could happen this holiday? Our greatest fears may not happen and, if they do, we can tap our strengths and the help of others to manage them," APA explained. "There will be time after the holiday season to follow up or do more of things we’ve overlooked or did not have the time to do during the holidays."
If you’re stressing out about what gifts to buy your kids, it’s actually not as important as spending time with them. Just try and think about your childhood memories. Of course, you can probably recall some memorable Christmas gifts you received, but I bet the memories of decorating the tree, playing in the snow, and trying to handle the construction of a gingerbread house are much brighter.
Dr. David Walsh, a psychologist, educator, and author specializing in parenting and family life, said that the positive feelings of warmth, safety, or happiness are examples of "emotional memories." And they "are very powerful and very important. Just as experiences link together different connections in our brain, experiences also wire together emotional connections," he explained.
While gifts might seem like a big deal to you right at this moment, the greatest present you can give your children is a bouquet of positive emotional memories and family rituals that they will, later on, pass to their families. "Creating family traditions, focusing on the meaning of the season, and carving out time for reflection can help buffer stress and provide a foundation for memories that last a lifetime," Dr. Walsh said.
Let’s be real, even though it’s hard to find the balance between being generous and standing up to our kids’ every demand, we still want them to have a good time. There’s always some struggle behind creating that Christmas magic and it’s really good to see that more and more parents are keeping it real and sharing their hilariously honest stories online to help others unwind.
