As everyone is starting to feel the autumn blues, parents face new challenges since the kids are switching back to classrooms. After all, it’s a conflicting time for moms and dads all across the globe. On one hand, it’s a chance for them to finally unwind and know their little one will be someone else’s problem for at least one part of the day. On the other, they’re bound to miss these beautiful creatures and their never-ending pranks.
But for children who haven’t flexed their brain cells in months, it can feel daunting. They have been waking up later, playing outside, and going on all sorts of adventures throughout the summer, so September changes can be disruptive. But according to Rachel Busman, Psy.D., a former senior director of the Anxiety Disorders Center at the Child Mind Institute, NYC, assessing how your child feels is key. "Keep the talk brief and open-ended. You might say, 'What's on your mind when you think of school?'" she told Parents.
Dr. Busman pointed out that returning to daily routines won't be a problem if parents prepare beforehand. "Some things will be easy and some may be difficult. But after an initial adjustment period, kids will settle back in."
Getting back to a healthy sleep routine is one way to ease kids into the change. The expert explained that gradually moving bedtime earlier by a half hour each week before school starts will help with the transition. However, it’s important to ensure the children know this decision is not up for debate. "Be firm and clear: 'I know you've enjoyed staying up late, and you can a little on the weekends. Starting Monday, bedtime will be at such and such time,'" Dr. Busman added.
If your little one rejects the idea, come up with fun pre-bedtime activities like reading or playing music to show that bedtime is something to look forward to. And if you are a parent to a few munchkins, it’s best to make it a one-on-one experience. "Kids crave time when they feel like the center of the universe, so make it a special thing between you—or whoever has the bedtime shift—and them," Dr. Busman suggested.
Another challenge that can seem intimidating for the kids is being apart from their moms and dads. Of course, this may be a temporary concern because they can quickly adjust while surrounded by other children and participating in engaging activities. But to ease the shift, Laura S. Olivos, Psy.D., a psychologist at the Olive Tree Center for Child and Family Psychology in Miami Beach, advised you to try out a three-pronged approach to address separation anxiety in your child.
According to Dr. Olivos, it’s best to start by creating structured routines to balance the nervous system. For example, you can design a visual schedule filled with colors that allow your little one to know the activities and tasks for the day. Then, let your child make choices in their routine so they can feel in control and be more autonomous.
"The third thing I would do is normalize worries and offer tools they can use to cope," Dr. Olivos said. These include mindfulness, breathing exercises, or anything else that helps your child to calm down. "Encourage them to breathe through their anxiety. And tell them you're proud of them for working through this."
For some parents, this can be an emotional time, too. Being separated from your child can feel like a chaotic journey filled with worries and countless twists and turns, and it can be incredibly hard. But let's face it, what do you do when things in life are seriously demanding? You poke fun at them, of course! Because laughter is the best medicine and the best way to take it is to laugh through the hilarious jokes moms and dads share online that talk all about the truth of raising kids.
As Holly Connors, author of the acclaimed blog Simplify Create Inspire and a working mom of two energetic girls, told Bored Panda in an earlier interview, parents need to keep it real. "Parenting can feel very isolated, especially if you do not have a great support system around you," she said. "This is where the online world can be both a great help and a hindrance. There is definitely some media that makes you feel like you are failing and this has absolutely no benefit for anyone. Especially not a parent navigating daily struggles as they learn alongside their child."
"However, hearing other people share stories of struggles, wins and very relatable moments is a great reminder that we aren't alone and that there is a massive community out there of people to connect with and learn from."
Parenting is hardly ever easy, but Holly reminded us there are plenty of positive and rewarding experiences that make all efforts worthwhile. "The best part of the parenting journey is seeing your child grow and adapt through each stage of development and marveling at the incredible resilience children show," she told us.
"We can learn a lot from our kids and there is no greater magic than appreciating the world through their eyes and their unique perspectives. Something you have seen and done 1000 times is suddenly new and exciting as they experience it for the first time. No other bond that compares to this!"
