Pandas, What's The Weirdest Convo You've Had With Your Parents As An Adult? (Closed)

As families go we don’t tend to talk about ANYTHING. Topics such as mental health are a big no no as my mother still thinks that being “mental” is a stigma on the whole family.

Anyway, work this out for yourselves and see if your reaction was the same as mine (Eeew. Urrrgh. Help!) - both parents are in their 80s and still married but 7 years ago my mother drops the bombshell that my sister and I have a 5 year old step kid courtesy of my father! I didn’t know whether to get him a Well Done card or shout abuse at him. He’s cut out of her will, has limited access to the shared bank account but she’s pre-payed for a funeral for him. He’s not allowed to own a mobile phone anymore either. No wonder I can’t admit being diagnosed with depression and anxiety: she’d certainly give me something to be anxious about if she knew! And she’ll kill me if she finds out I’ve published this.

Decided to play Card Against Humanity. My mom is an immigrant so I naturally I had to explain to her what a**l beads are. fml

I went to a small Christian school in elementary school and most kids were extremely sheltered..(i was in the middle,not sheltered but also not really exposed to a lot) -particularly my parents don’t cuss and I couldn’t watch a lot of movies etc-long story short all of isn’t kids on the playground would swap new bad words or phrases we would learn most without even knowing what they mean we just knew they were bad or dirty words. Some kid told me boner and bastard I had no clue really what either one meant. My parents heard me calling my brother a boner. Enter here the most awkward sit down talk about what those words mean and using words I don’t know. I felt so embarrassed sitting there being explained what a boner was especially after calling my brother that! SMH 🤭🥴

My first husband (Fabian), my parents and I were watching the movie “Dante’s Peak” after they had joined us for dinner one night. There is a scene where the family is in a boat, traversing a lava filled acidic river. The boat paddles disintegrate and the family in the boat cannot quite get to the shore. So grandma jumps in, pulls the boat the rest of the way, and promptly dies to save the rest of the family. I turn and look at my Mom and say, as a truthful compliment, “you would do that, sacrifice yourself to save us all.” And my Mom, who is watching the movie intently, says “No, I would push Fabian in”. She continued to be engrossed in the film. Fabian and I looked at each other, knowing Mom had no idea what she had just said out loud. It was a very awkward moment!

My mom remarried at 65 after my dad died and one night she called and said "I need some advice" she then proceeded to tell me that her new fiancée whom I hadn't met wanted her to take a bath with him. She said that she had only been with one man in her whole life and that was my dad. "What should I do" she asked. My response, "My advice is CALL ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS" that was not a conversation I was interested in having. Like a lot of mothers and daughters of my generation we have never had that kind of relationship.

I once spent 6 minutes explaining to my mom what an app is.

My dad had been fighting cancer for 6 years. The good treatment options were pretty well exhausted. He developed a condition that was easy to treat, but left untreated would provide a peaceful and comfortable passing. Cancer would likely take him in another year or two, but it would be excruciating. We had a lengthy conversation about whether he wanted to continue treatment or allow himself to pass within a week to 10 days.

My mom came across my college art portfolio when I was home on break...
Mom: WHY are you drawing nude people?!
Me: It’s for my Life Drawing class. It’s a requirement for all art majors. You saw it on my schedule.
Mom: I...thought it was Still Life...like baskets of fruits and nuts...
Me:
Mom:
Me: *stifling a snort-giggle*
Mom: *shakes head and walks away wordlessly*
(We have never spoken of it since.)

I saw the musical Ghost on Broadway together with my father. Ghost: one of the most romantic lovestories from the eighties. At the start of the interval, my father turns around and says: "Well... you don't see that very often: a musical about financial problems."

I'm still baffled that we share genetic material.

My mom had a stroke when she was in her 60s and lived until she was 82, when a series of strokes ended her life. She had trouble making sense with her talking and she would say things like “the falatalee is unner the swan.” We would spend hours trying to figures these mysteries out, and once I walked into my dad’s office, and there, on a months-old sticky note, was “THE FALATALEE IS UNNER THE SWAN.” Turns out he has searched the house looking for whatever it was. And the engineer in him never figured it out.

I tell this story not to make fun of my mom, but to celebrate her memory.

I was 27 when my father asked me what a prostate massage was. This was pre-Internet so he couldn't just Google it.

I was in my room when I began eavesdropping on my parents(cause I’m a creep) and I heard about our upcoming trip to Las Vegas. And I hear my dad say to my mom, “and you better believe that I’m gonna bring it. “ My mom then confused asked what he meant by that. Dad then says, “ the elephant “. Mom still confused at this point. And me thinking what elephant could be important for this trip? I later discovered to my horror that he was talking about his very detailed elephant Speedolike underwear.