Social Issues,Entitled PeopleMAR 28, 2024

"Obsession With Therapy-Speak": 36 Things Older People Don't Get About The Younger Generations

Justinas Keturka and Rokas Laurinavičius

We often talk about generation gaps — the beliefs and behaviors separating Millennials, Baby Boomers, and all the rest of the cohorts in politics, work ethic, technology adoption, and other aspects of life.

Interested in exploring the subject further, Reddit user 5h0gKur4C4ndl made a post on the platform, asking its older users to list the things that they cannot understand about younger people.

From experiencing life through your phone to labeling everyone around you, we collected some of the most popular replies to shed more light on what drives the disconnect between us. Hopefully, that'll bring us one step closer to bridging it.

#1

"Obsession With Therapy-Speak": 36 Things Older People Don't Get About The Younger Generations

Their obsession with immediately diagnosing psychological things and turning everything into therapy-speak. "You're gaslighting me", etc.

vickyswaggo, cottonbro studio

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139points

#2

Why do you want to watch a 100% of a concert, that you payed good money for, through your phone lens?

LeluWater, Görkem Cetinkaya

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136points

We got in touch with the person who started this discussion, and they agreed to chat with us about it.

"I came up with the idea for the post when I was just scrolling through Reddit," 5h0gKur4C4ndl explained to Bored Panda.

"It was the first time in a while; quitting and then coming back is a surefire way to get new material."

#3

The emails I get from my students aged 18-25 are such a mess of incoherent garbage, I can't tell if they are lazy or if it's an actual literacy issue. And I'm barely older than they are so if this is a generational gap, it happened quickly!

NefariousSalamander, Solen Feyissa

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124points

#4

Recording yourself crying.

BlueberryNo5363, cottonbro studio

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121points

As the thread went viral, 5h0gKur4C4ndl noticed that "most of the answers were reasonable enough."

The Redditor isn't entirely sure if the conversations will remain civil as time goes on, but so far, the main points seem to be general attitude, convenience issues, and "whatever your grandparents would complain about."

#5

Taking public calls on speaker phone and sending voice messages. .

rizlar09

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119points

#6

The absolute lack of capacity to deal with any emotional stress or upheaval without turning into a gibbering mess.

I’m being hyperbolic of course, but I have literally now lost count of how many students I’ve dealt with who cannot under any circumstances be given criticism or negative feedback without utterly falling to pieces.

I had someone messing around in a lecture, playing with their phone and being disruptive. I stopped the lecture and told them to put it away and pay attention or leave.

They looked SHOCKED to have been called out, and sat there quietly for the next 10-15 minutes until suddenly going all “deer in the headlights” when asked a question in relation to the topic and then running the full length of the lecture hall and out the room.

I was informed the following day that the student had went to counselling services to complain that I had “put unreasonable pressure on him by asking him questions in class, and set off his anxiety”.

He then told the University he would need to take the next 2 weeks off with extensions for all his submissions in order to “get over the troubling experience”.

He was mid 20’s at this point.

****************

Another situation happened when a student was told that their research work was unfortunately substandard.

They seemed utterly baffled at how they could’ve gotten any criticism on it, when given suggestions on where they went wrong (lacking depth to the arguments, biased stances, non-credible sources) they went on a tirade about how they wouldn’t use any source that didn’t align with their perspective because “they’re the anti-X crowd and all f*****g evil”.

This person then burst into tears and when they realised the door was locked (it needs a key code to open it) they started freaking out, screaming and hollering as though they were being physically attacked.

Any attempt to talk to them was met with more tears and screams and when the door was opened she ran out of the building.

Indiana_harris

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118points

From how we vote to how we tackle climate change and other pressing issues, the generation gap sometimes seems bigger than ever before.

There are the boomers, people born in the post-war baby boom period. The case against them is that they enjoyed free higher education and affordable housing, and then created a huge economic and environmental mess for everyone else to clean up.

Then there are the millennials – folks born between the early '80s and mid-'90s. The charges against them are that they’ve killed off everything from mayonnaise to fabric conditioner, and spend their money away on avocado on toast and oatmeal lattes instead of saving up for what's important in life.

Generation X is sitting largely forgotten in the middle, and Generation Z, the youngsters raised on social media, are just entering the real world.

#7

Their inability to see the nuance on a lot of issues. It’s black or white for them, completely ignoring the multitude of layers and shades of gray that exist in the world.

CGMM_15

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117points

#8

Apparently, despite growing up with technology around them, they don't know how to use computers properly because they focus mostly on smartphones and tablets.

NoobDinosaur, Valery

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111points

To some extent, a level of friction between the cohorts is to be expected. "We work together really well in groups,” said Catherine Loveday, professor of psychology at Westminster University, UK. "We are more protective and more supportive towards people in our in-group and we will do a lot to help them."

"The downside is that when we instinctively see someone as being part of an out-group, we tend to not be so supportive towards them."

#9

If I have to teach one more adult how alphabetical order works, I'm going to lose it.

These are university graduates. They just throw the file back in. Like how did you find it in the first place?

jneinefr, Alexander Dummer

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99points

#10

Tiktok is an actual news source for some.

Illiteratap, Nik

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93points

5h0gKur4C4ndl agrees. "Gaps are inevitable since everyone has their own preferences and needs," the Redditor added.

"If there will ever be something that will allow generations to finally close them, it will likely be because there is something so meaningful, it changes the whole world."

To begin, however, we could at least try and see each other's best attributes and pick up on our similarities instead of antagonizing everyone we don't agree with.

#11

Gen Z has a very strong not my problem/not my job someone else will do it/fix it attitude.

Ghostforever7, MART PRODUCTION

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93points

#12

37 year old attending college for the first time here. They have negative confidence. They barely speak above a mumble, especially when answering a question from the teacher. Most of them would rather die than talk to someone they're interested in. It's like 90% of them are cripplingly introverted.

Intelligent-Mud1437, Pixabay

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83points

#13

I'm a middle school teacher.

My kids will routinely claim they can't do anything and then shut down and do nothing. And then... It's easy and they do it.

It goes like this: "Everybody, here's the assignment. Follow all the steps."

I go around the room and one kid forgot their Chromebook, ir a pencil. One kid needs a charger. One kid doesn't understand "any of the steps."

So basically it's the degree of learned helplessness. They know to ask when I go over, but if there are twenty kids and I get to them last, they will do nothing (no phones, nothing!) for twenty minutes and act surprised I'm irritated they didn't grab a damn pencil from the freeeee pencils on my desk. And then act surprised they're behind on the assignment!

Or I'll ask "okay, which of the 5 steps is tough for you?" "All of them." "K, read step 1." "Oh. That's easy."

Rinse and repeat.

scarletuba

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82points

#14

Why they'd rather watch someone else play a video game than play it themselves. That was a punishment when I was a kid, not entertainment.

deadevilmonkey, Fausto Sandoval

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79points

#15

Treating fixable problems as core personality traits, and focusing on accommodating them rather than fixing them.

Too anxious to go to the grocery store? Too fat to do well in gym class? Too shy to make friends? Too illiterate to enjoy reading? The ADA is not for you. Fix your s**t.

RemoteWasabi4, Jessica Da Rosa

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75points

#16

The lack of understanding that things put on the internet are public forever.

Leading_Screen_4216, Ron Lach

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70points

#17

They've been so coddled and raised in front of screens rather than interacting in the real world that ANYTHING gives them anxiety.

Talking to people, trying something new, going somewhere, literally anything can make them shut down.

UniqueUsername82D

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63points

#18

The self victimization, clinging to whatever label they think will shield them from criticism, learned helplessness, refusal to consider viewpoints that doing align with their worldview. I could go on.

ghoulishly-yours

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63points

#19

The need to document every thought, bite of food, outfit change , papsmear , and things that leave them " literally shaking right now".. like the lady at Starbucks calling you sir when clearly you're a they/them with a beard.

New-Lie414

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62points

#20

I’m in my forties and I manage a small group of people who are in their 20s to early thirties. What I notice most is how anxious and fearful they seem to be. Everyone is out to get them. I often get approached by subordinates who want me to do something about a colleague who is doing them wrong in some way. After I gather more information, it almost always is a case of poor assumption about someone else’s intentions, coupled with a desire to jump to the worst case scenario. If I ask them a series of probing questions about other possible interpretations they often admit they didn’t consider those possibilities. The other thing is too much bravado - over confidence in their knowledge, skill or ability in an area. I think it’s potentially a defense mechanism to combat the fear and the people they think are out to get them.

Reasonable_Human55

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61points