Everyone loves the pizza delivery person! I mean, they turn up right there on your doorstep with a steaming circle of cheesy deliciousness, saving you any effort aside from getting up from the couch, all that's left to do is enjoy. What's not to like?
This benevolent bearer of good vibes often gets a unique insight into the everyday lives of ordinary people - we tend to order pizzas when we are relaxed, happy and having a good time. Tumblr user Tybaar realized that her job yielded an absolute goldmine of great stories, and decided to share them with the internet. We are so glad she did!
From stoned teens to lesbians tipping with giant sacks of pistachios, you just never know what kind of hungry soul is going to answer that door. Scroll down to check out this pizza delivery woman's weird and wonderful experiences for yourself, and let us know what you think in the comments!
Image credits: rick (not the actual photo)
Image credits: tybaar
#1
"A hotel room full of badass middle-aged women all dressed as Professor McGonagall from the Harry Potter films, who were also completely wasted on Jello shots. They kept encouraging me to stay and party with them."
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135points
#2
"An adorable older lesbian couple who were mortified that they didn’t have any extra money for a tip, so they gave me a big sack of pistachios instead. It took me three weeks to finish the bag."
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119points
#3
"An incredibly stoned teenager trying and failing to look sober. When I complimented his Adventure Time wallet (which was super cute) and asked where he got it, he immediately looked terrified, sat down on the floor and muttered: “I… I don’t know….”
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93points
#4
"A group of EMT’s hanging out in the back of an ambulance at a recently extinguished (but still smoldering) house fire."
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90points
#6
"A furious lady who yelled at me for a solid five minutes (I kept track) all about how long it took for her delivery to get to her. She then tipped me an extra ten bucks on a six dollar order. I dunno."
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87points
#7
"Multiple prank deliveries (joke’s on you motherf***er, I get paid for the gas AND I eat the pizzas you ordered.)"
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86points
#8
"A group of 20-something guys who challenged me to sing the original Pokemon theme song, which I did. And perfectly, I may add."
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80points
#9
"An elderly Spanish woman who meekly presented me with a (rather classy) pearl-handled .32 snub-nosed revolver and asked if I knew how to load it (I do) and also, if I could load it for her (I didn’t)."
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79points
#11
"An on-duty cop who flagged me down by intercepting me on the road before I got to the police station and pulling me over to get his pizza."
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74points
#12
"A man with a thick Alabama accent who admonished me for standing in front of his mailbox while I waited for him to answer the door. He then explained how this was a federal offense because I was “obstructing the mail system” and demanded my social security number so he could “report me to the proper authorities."
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72points
#13
"A guy who slipped a twenty directly into my shirt because I apparently was the “spitting image” of his deceased daughter."
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69points
#14
"A surly Korean mom with an amazing shoulder tattoo of a baby giving birth to a full-grown woman."
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69points
#15
"A woman who slipped me a business card (in lieu of tip) for a laser tattoo removal clinic, explaining “In case you want to bring your mutilated skin back to how God intended it to be.”
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63points
#16
"A man who lived in one of those mini-mansions inside a gated community, who sported a seemingly massive collection of what appeared to be solid glass spheres of varying size and color. I only got a quick glance in his house but there had to be hundreds of them in display racks, tables, shelves - everywhere."
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60points
#17
"A 20-something dude who answered the door with an unsheathed katana dangling through a belt loop on his jeans."
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53points
#18
"A very drunk dude who gave me his iPhone and had me take a bunch of Myspace-esque pictures of the both of us. He did the duck lips thing in every shot."
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53points
#19
"A chick at a house party who answered the door and immediately turned to vomit into her mailbox."
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53points
#20
"A woman who admonished me for driving a Mazda, and wrote “get a real car” in the tip portion of my credit receipt."
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51points