51 Times Tiny Communities Somehow Produced Enough Drama For An Entire Reality Show

We mostly view gossip as a bad thing. Especially when it turns malicious, it can damage reputations and erode trust. But some experts would argue that there is an upside to it. 

University of California, San Diego professor Eshin Jolly, for one, says it is a “universal form of social connection.”

“Gossiping is valuable because it gives us an opportunity to vicariously learn from others,” Jolly said. “We can experience things from other people’s point of view and share our own experiences.” 

He even went so far as to say that repeated gossiping can build trust, relationships, and social bonds.

Jolly also explained that talking about other people’s lives behind their backs helps us negotiate social norms because “we are having a conversation underneath a conversation.” 

“When you comment on someone’s behavior, you’re not just saying what they did; you’re implicitly asking, ‘Hey, do you think this is ok? Do you feel weird about this too?’”

We’ve all gossiped in one form or another, whether it’s talking about a controversy someone was involved in at work or discussing how a neighbor handled their marital problem. According to Knox College psychology professor Frank McAndrew, it is almost unavoidable. 

“I don’t think it’s possible to stop people from gossiping,” McAndrew told The Guardian. “It’s a part of who we are, like eating or breathing.”

If you don’t want the ugly repercussions of gossiping, take some precautions. For one, avoid adding alcohol into the mix where your ability to restrain yourself is much lower. 

“In a situation where your guard is down, and your inhibitions are lifted, you’re at greater risk,” he said. “You may not remember exactly what you said to whom, or be aware that you did something you shouldn’t have.”