Even grown-ups have nightmares from time to time. However, for kids to have them is more common. And if we remember from childhood, most of us always wanted to run to our parents where we feel safe and protected and we know that no monster can catch us.
Babycenter states that after a child has had a nightmare, physical reassurance is important, so hug them or rub their back until they calm down. The request from parents to never wake them up during the night for anything again won’t make a kid feel better when they come for comfort.
More info: Reddit
After getting scared, even adults wants comfort and to feel safe, though for kids, it’s even more important to receive
Image credits: Brad West (not the actual photo)
Woman remembers when she was 9 Y.O. and was told by her dad to never wake him up during the night again
Image credits: u/Accomplished-Towel-3
Image credits: Julia M Cameron (not the actual photo)
The girl woke up from a nightmare, woke up her dad for comfort, however was told to go back to sleep and never wake him up again, thus she made sure not to
Image credits: u/Accomplished-Towel-3
Image credits: Victor (not the actual photo)
One night she saw an intruder trying to open the doors in the house, but luckily they didn’t succeed
Image credits: u/Accomplished-Towel-3
Next morning she informed her parents, who freaked out and asked why she didn’t wake them up as they would have ‘allowed’ her to wake them up in emergencies
A few days ago, a woman shared her malicious compliance story that she remembered from when she was 9 years old and got instructed by her dad to not wake him up during the night for anything. The post caught a lot of folks’ attention and 4 days later it had over 7K upvotes and 182 comments.
The woman brought back memories from when she was 9 years old and woke up from a nightmare. Of course, she was scared and couldn’t fall asleep, so she went to her dad for comfort, but he just told her to go back to bed and to never wake him up again for anything. Well, she made sure to not do that anymore.
A few days later, on the weekend, she stayed up late to watch TV. Then in the middle of the night, she suddenly heard a tapping on the door and attempts to open it. Luckily, the intruder was unsuccessful, so after a few minutes, she mustered up the courage and went back to sleep. The next morning, the girl informed her parents, who obviously freaked out and asked why she didn’t wake them up. However, she did exactly what she was told - to not wake dad up for anything anymore.
Community members unfortunately related to the author about not being allowed to wake their parents and the impact it had in the long run. “I used to have horrific nightmares as a kid and I'd get spanked if I woke my folks up. So yay lifelong struggles with insomnia,” one user wrote. Additionally, folks commented that in this case, what her parents meant by ‘an emergency’ was something that’s bad for them but not for their daughter.
Image credits: Kampus Production (not the actual photo)
Bored Panda got in touch with Vicki, a TV and radio broadcaster and the founder of honestmum.com. Also, you can find her on Instagram as @honestmum! She kindly agreed to share her insights regarding the impact on kids after they are discouraged to seek comfort and help from parents as in this story.
“Instructing a child not to wake you as a parent under any circumstance is negligent and selfish and doesn't serve the child, nor the parent,” Vicki shares. There are various reasons why a child can wake up at night, such as nightmares, night terror or, as we can see in this case, an intruder compromising the whole family’s safety.
“This child should be able to trust and depend on a parent unconditionally. Removing that causes fear and distrust. Quickly, the child will stop opening up to the parent with their concerns as they will feel confused as to what they are free to share and importantly when they can share,” she emphasizes.
It’s important that parents rectify their behavior and confirm that the kid is free and welcome to come to them for support, day or night. Additionally, Vicki says that if there are issues with nightmares, to manage anxiety it would be helpful to implement more exercise, mindfulness activities and a strict bedtime routine and these things will help alleviate nightmares.
However, the key is talking to your kid in a supportive and empathetic way. Your kid, just like an adult, needs to feel loved and cared for, not only in daylight hours or when convenient.
“The trauma of experiencing an intruder break in and then not being able to reach out for help would have been highly distressing for the child. The parent must now apologize and commit to changing their 'no interruption bedtime policy' and to stick with it, building trust in the child which will take time,” Vicki highlights.
Folks shared their similar memories from childhood and had a little discussion with the author in comments
