I am a Lebanese designer and animator of Armenian descent based in New York City. Here is the story behind a very short animated loop I created almost a year ago, and what it means to me now.
October 17, 2019 - Brooklyn, New York
I am sitting in my Brooklyn apartment when my phone suddenly gets flooded with messages and videos. A Lebanese revolution has begun. Though I am far away, my heart, still deeply connected to my home country, feels for all my fellow Lebanese people. The public outcry is anything but surprising and frankly long overdue; rampant corruption and deceit had been crushing the prospects of the Lebanese for decades. However, what was unprecedented was the unified nature of the uproar; a revolution with people of all ages, religions, sects and genders, standing together. Anyone who knows about Lebanese history, understands the significance of this moment.
Many factors led to this historic event, from a planned tax on WhatsApp, an app widely used by the Lebanese in both their personal and professional endeavors, to an uncontained wildfire exacerbated by the perpetual underfunding of the country’s fire brigade. The huge Lebanese diaspora joined in from abroad, with some even returning home to partake in the protests, lamenting the very conditions which had forced so many to leave in pursuit of a better future elsewhere.
This revolution was all I could think about and talk about. The next day, unable to concentrate on my other work, I stayed up all night, animating, creating, knowing that my art would probably not make a difference to anyone but me. But I was possessed, and I needed an outlet to express my outrage towards the shortcomings of the sectarian rule, my pride in my people and my hope for change. I had never worked so fast; I forgot to eat and sat hunched over my Wacom tablet for hours without pause. Those familiar with 2D animation, know how time-consuming the process can be. Given my fondness for draftsmanship, I took advantage of the morphing and transitional quality of 2D frame by frame animation. I animated this as a loop, starting and ending with the Lebanese flag with its symbolic cedar tree emblazoned across the center. The tree is set ablaze and a phoenix is seen rising from its ashes and transforming into a new tree, a new beginning. The imagery is inspired by the legend that Beirut, just like a phoenix, has risen from the ashes seven times. I didn’t think much of my choice to animate a loop. But now, looking back, it feels as though the Lebanese people subconsciously live in a never ending cycle, hoping for the best but expecting the worst.
August 4th, 2020 - Beirut, Lebanon
Months later, I am sitting in that same Brooklyn apartment when a video is sent in my family WhatsApp group chat. The worst has happened. I watch as a nuclear-like explosion erupts in the port and engulfs Beirut. The shockwaves resonate far beyond. I am in shock. I burst into tears. I can’t even comprehend the footage I just watched. Everything is in pieces. The streets I used to walk with my friends, the places we ate at, the homes we visited, the galleries we frequented, the studios we admired, the neighborhoods which inspired us. Even worse is the sight of destroyed hospitals. The safe havens the surviving people are walking towards, barefoot and injured. The people lost, the children, the mothers, the fathers, the brothers and sisters, the friends…The notion of the animated loop becomes even more eerie as Beirut, a microcosm of the chaotic country of which it is the capital, has been destroyed. Again. I am trying to get news from all of my loved ones, while also getting messages from almost every person I have ever met. For the next week, I am consumed by the news. I am following every political commentator, reading every article, every survival story, every Facebook post. I am far, but my thoughts, my prayers and my heart are all in Lebanon.
A month has since passed and I keep thinking of this loop I animated almost a year ago. Art, in all its forms, has always played an integral role in helping me make sense of the world; even more so during these uncertain times. I, just like most Lebanese people, feel stuck in this cycle of witnessing my country constantly being destroyed and rebuilt. The characteristic resilience of the Lebanese seems to have run its course; people are tired and just want someone to take responsibility. I want to help more and do more for my country. A country which was already hanging on by a thread since the revolution and the added strain of the worldwide Coronavirus. A country which is experiencing the greatest economic collapse of its history. A country which has suffered at the hands of unforgivable criminal negligence. The possibilities seem limited and hope a faint notion. Will the phoenix rise again? I sure hope so. But what I hope for most is for this to be the last time we are forced to rise again. I wish for a reborn Beirut, a reborn Lebanon and most of all, a lasting Lebanon. Let us retire the legend of the rising phoenix. Instead of Lebanon rising once again, I hope for it to rise once and for all.
For anyone who wishes to help Lebanon and donate, I have listed trustworthy organizations that offer relief and housing to people affected by the devastating Beirut explosion in this post:
https://www.instagram.com/p/CDjcix4JtNB/?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet
Lebanon Will Rise Again | Animated Loop (Oct 2019)
Translation from Arabic: My heart is broken (Aug 2020)
