My Coming Out Basically ...(Part 2)

this is continued from part 1... you would ony need t read it if you wanted to keep up with people and fake names... hope you enjoy :P)

I wanted to come out to my mom at FtM trans...

We sat in the car ( me in the front with her) in front of my freinds house and she realized I was crying.
mom: whats wrong
me: im confused
mom: about what
me: my gender...
mom:...
me: * explains how ive been changing personality wise*
mom: *lisening*
mom: * explains how iv'e always been girly and this is just a phase*
me: * stops crying and gets own of the parked car to go to my friends house*

... yeah didnt go so well so i tried again...

I was in class when I heard about one of my friends coming out as trans to his parents. This kind of inspired me to do the same and I texted my mom " Hey mom if you love me can I be your son?"

...Read... 3 dots show up...3 dots dissapeared... we never talked about it again...

While I was still in 7th grade I also realized I was pansexual, polyamourous, and very fictosexual ( which was caused by hot anime characters XD).

I didn't really need to come out since I was still LGBT. All I did was correct people who said I was bi.

It stayed like that until recently...

So me and Eliza ended up becoming very close friends again... which led to us dating... again... but one difference Eliza is no longer FtM but non-binary... now called Ash.

We are both now in 8th grade- heck I'm wiriting this in class with them behind me- and they have been so supportive throughout all of this.

A few months ago I came out to my cousin who is pan and non binary... she accepted me and we spent that night crying as we talked about gender identity and sexuality...

Last month (nov 2020) I was questioning gender again...

Mmmkay... so I bought a crop-top, and I want a skirt i saw at hot topic... and now idk if i just have a fem boy mindset, which would be very different from my tomboy-ish nature.

I'm begining to think I might be gender queer or gender fluid.

gender queer- some sort of combination of any and all genders.

gender fluid-gender varies over time

only 3 people know about this... my s/o Ash and one of my best friends... tho i guess if ur reading this you know too...

right now im in class... on the verge of tears bc idk what to do or who i can go to for advice... these have been kind of like rants for me...

thanks for reading
until next post ig...