Ancient Greek mathematician and physicist Archimedes famously said: “Give me a lever long enough and a fulcrum on which to place it, and I shall move the world.” While this is technically true, it is virtually impossible (probably for the best – let the world stay where it is). There is one thing though that can literally move the world, at least your personal one. And that thing is music. Have you ever noticed how the worst of days can suddenly become so much better once you listen to a good song? Music has a very specific power to make everything right, and we really should use that power more.
Having worked with musicians quite a bit, I can assure you that they do like a good music joke. And not only general band kid humor. Most bands have insider band jokes about that time they played that gig or that time they had to improvise because the guitar got unplugged in the middle of the performance.
You don’t have to be a professional musician to understand jokes about music, and that’s probably the best part. My favorite type of music jokes are song puns, where you can add a letter to the song’s name and turn it into something completely different and hilarious. You should definitely try it. Make a list of all your favorite songs and see how you can change them with one letter to make them sound funny.
What other types of music puns have you heard? Have you ever told a musician jokes about their profession? Or maybe you are a musician yourself? Enjoy this collection of music jokes, and tell me about your favorite one in the comments.
#1
Steal a man's wallet and he'll be poor for a day.
But teach him to play an instrument and he'll be poor for the rest of his life.
Unknown
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#2
How do you make Lady Gaga mad?
Poker face.
Unknown
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#3
Kids shouldn’t watch the orchestra.
Too much sax and violins.
Unknown
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#4
Why do bagpipe players walk when they play?
To get away from the noise.
Unknown
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#5
What song do vampires hate?
'You Are My Sunshine'.
Unknown
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#6
How do you tell the difference between a violinist and a dog?
The dog knows when to stop scratching.
Unknown
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#7
Why is a piano so hard to open?
Because the keys are on the inside.
Unknown
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#8
What do you call clean music?
A soap opera!
Unknown
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#9
A while ago, my friend told me not to listen to loud music.
I haven’t heard from that guy since.
Unknown
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#10
My girlfriend broke up with me because I quote too many Linkin Park songs.
But "in the end, it doesn't even matter".
Unknown
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#11
How do you make a bandstand?
Take away their chairs.
Unknown
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#12
What kind of music do bunnies like?
Hip Hop.
Unknown
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#13
What types of songs do planets sing?
Nep-tunes.
Unknown
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#14
What’s green and sings?
Elvis Parsley.
Unknown
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#15
What do you call an elf that sings?
A wrapper.
Unknown
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#16
What’s the difference between a conductor and God?
God doesn’t think he’s a conductor.
Unknown
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#17
I knew Ice Cube when he was called Water.
Unknown
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#18
A sign at a music shop: “Gone Chopin. Bach in a minuet.”
Unknown
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#19
What genre of music is the national anthem?
Country music.
Unknown
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#20
I heard you lost your classical music CD. But don't worry, I've got your Bach.
Unknown
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