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The Best And The Funniest Dad Jokes
FunnyFEB 18, 2025

The Best And The Funniest Dad Jokes

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Trying to determine what makes a good (or bad) dad joke is not so easy, but there are certain ingredients that we can name. First of all, the one-liner has to be administered by a dad (not necessarily your own), it has to be both corny and somewhat amusing, and most of all, it just has to have a hackneyed pun to make it the best joke ever. 
Although not everyone is a big fan of that type of comedy gold, there is a certain amount of appreciation any person can have for a well-timed funny pun. Especially if it's followed by thunderous laughter from the person and the classic finger-guns pose.
Oh, and if you’re a dad joke aficionado like we are, you might be surprised to know where these inappropriate jokes stem from. So, the first theory is that your beloved father just feels nostalgic for those times when you were little and laughed at just about anything. 
The other approach for these hilarious jokes is a much more anticipated one—your father wants to embarrass you as much as he can while he can. And that's precisely what these funny jokes are meant to do.
Scroll down below to see some of the best funny dad jokes around, and don't forget to comment and vote for your favorites.

#1 Can I Have A Book Mark?

Can I Have A Book Mark?
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
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#2 Holy Water

Holy Water
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
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#3 Nobody Knows

Nobody Knows
What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.
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#4 Conversation Starter

Conversation Starter
My daughter screeched, "Daaaaaad, you haven't listened to one word I've said, have you!?" What a strange way to start a conversation with me...
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#5 Dying To Get There

Dying To Get There
When a dad drives past a graveyard: Did you know that's a popular cemetery? Yep, people are just dying to get in there!
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#6 Sir Arthur's Knights

Sir Arthur's Knights
The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
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#7 Vegetarian Zombie

Vegetarian Zombie
What does a zombie vegetarian eat? “GRRRAAAAAIIIINNNNS!”
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#8 Witnessing A Robery

Witnessing A Robery
If you see a robbery at an Apple Store does that make you an iWitness?
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#9 Invisible Man

Invisible Man
Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer? He couldn't see himself doing it.
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#10 Happy Anniversary

Happy Anniversary
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? AYE MATEY
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#11 Ice Cream Truck

Ice Cream Truck
When an ambulance zips past with its siren blaring: "They won’t sell much ice cream driving that fast.”
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#12 Math Problems

Math Problems
5/4 of people admit that they’re bad with fractions.
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#13 Dentist Time

Dentist Time
What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.
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#14 Half Left

Half Left
When you ask a dad if he's alright: "No, I’m half left.”
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#15 Three Guys

Three Guys
Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.
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#16 Kidding

Kidding
When a woman is giving birth, she is literally kidding.
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#17 Bison And Buffalo

Bison And Buffalo
What did the buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school? Bison.
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#18 Salted Peanut

Salted Peanut
Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was a salted.
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#19 Forever 21

Forever 21
Where did the college-aged vampire like to shop? Forever 21.
Unknown
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#20 A Trumpet

A Trumpet
You know what the loudest pet you can get is? A trumpet.
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