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Brianna’s post on TikTok got a ton of attention online. It garnered 1.7 million views, 97.3k likes, 53.8k comments at the time of writing. Clearly, the sensitive topic was one that resonated with a lot of internet users.
Unfortunately, lots of people have to deal with individuals who struggle with their emotional intelligence every single day. The bad news is that far from everyone develops these skills naturally. The good news? You can learn to be more emotionally intelligent, just like any other skill.
In a nutshell, according to Verywell Mind, people with high emotional intelligence (abbreviated as EI or EQ) tend to be:
- Self-aware
- Empathetic
- Perceptive
- Expressive
- Good at regulating their emotions
- Able to stay motivated while working toward their goals
- In possession of strong social and communication skills
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AT THE CEMETERY.
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Emotionally intelligent individuals are able to perceive, understand, and manage their own emotions, as well as those of others. These are all vital skills to have, both in your private and professional life.
If you want to improve your EQ, you should start by reflecting on your level of self-awareness. Try to get to grips with your emotions and understand how they impact your beliefs, behaviors, and the people around you.
Something else that can help you strengthen your emotional intelligence is practicing mindfulness techniques. In essence, this means becoming more present with both your thoughts and emotions. When upset at someone, you could, for example, try a deep breathing exercise and give yourself room to consider your strategy. It’s a much wiser approach than lashing out at the other person.
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If you decide to work with a therapist, they might suggest that you try cognitive behavioral therapy to improve your emotional regulation. Essentially, the mental health professional will teach you healthy coping mechanisms so you can handle difficult emotions.
Also, you can always enrol in social and emotional learning programs for adults so you can strengthen your empathy, identity, and communication skills.
Meanwhile, the Harvard Business Review urges people to recognize and name their emotions. Here are some questions to ask yourself:
- What emotions are you feeling right now? Can you name them?
- When in a stressful situation, what emotions typically arise?
- How would you like to respond in these situations?
- Can you stop to pause and reconsider your response?
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I sent an ex a video of a kid ruining a wedding and told him “one of the many reasons I don’t want kids” - something I had said to him since the very first date. This was a year later. He SNAPPED at me. Lost his s**t.
Told me I was being ridiculous for hating children and now wanting them because women were put on this earth to be mothers. He told me I was selfish for not wanting kids (mind you, for the past year, he said he didn’t want them either. He was lying thinking he could change me). When he realized I wasn’t going to change my mind, he went insane.
He told me if I just got pregnant and had the kid, he would raise it alone, and I wouldn’t even need to be involved 🤯 like… what?!?? How traumatizing to the kid. (I still have the screenshots to prove it because it was the most insane thing I’ve ever heard).
He told me I was a horrible person and would end up alone because women are meant to have kids and no one would marry a women who didn’t.
Well, I’m now happily married to someone who doesn’t want kids either. We have a house full of pets and travel the world every few months 🩵
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On top of that, don’t be scared of asking your colleagues, family, and friends for feedback on your emotional intelligence, empathy, and adaptability. This is easier said than done, but it’s usually unbiased outsiders’ perspectives that can help us grow as individuals.
What is the dumbest, most bizarre reason why anyone has ever gotten mad at you, Pandas? How did you react, and what was the fallout like? How would you rate your emotional intelligence? If you’ve got a moment, share your thoughts in the comments at the bottom of this post.
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