Your parents are supposed to be there for you, but while Reddit user Front-Restaurant2366 was growing up, his mom added a lot of unnecessary pressure and confusion.
In a heartfelt post shared on r/PettyRevenge, the man opened up about the emotional toll that came with her consistently trying to convince him—and everyone else—that he had a developmental disorder, despite thriving in school and daily life.
Even medical professionals couldn't get her to change her mind.
It takes a while to figure out the sort of person you are and want to become
Image credits: Caseen Kyle Registos/Unsplash (not the actual photo)
And getting "diagnosed" with conditions you don't have just makes things worse
Image credits: amenic181/ Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Front-Restaurant2366
An autism diagnosis can, indeed, be tricky, but it's difficult to understand why the mom didn't take the doctor's word for it
Image credits: Curated Lifestyle/Unsplash (not the actual photo)
We got in touch with the author of the post, and he told Bored Panda, "My mom is absolutely crazy, as I wrote in the post, but these things happen a lot with fellow Asian parents. My mom just happens to be one of the craziest."
For those who might object, Front-Restaurant2366 added, "You can visit r/AsianParentStories for more stories about insane Asian parents. I'll also say that it's nothing uncommon in my country, as similar stuff happens in the families of my peers."
The autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is a neurodevelopmental disorder affecting about 1.5% of the population.
It can look very different from person to person. Each individual exhibits a unique set of symptoms and different degrees of severity, which can make the diagnosis challenging.
One of the biggest issues is the co-occurrence of other disorders. Roughly 70% to 80% of autistic people with milder forms of ASD are also diagnosed with another psychiatric condition. More than half of young autistic children have four or more other conditions.
A 2020 paper showed the following rates of prevalence of the other psychiatric conditions found in autistic people:
- 20% had anxiety disorders;
- 11% had depressive disorders;
- 9% had obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD);
- 5% had bipolar disorder;
- 4% had schizophrenia spectrum disorder.
ASD can manifest itself in a number of symptoms, ranging from mild to severe. The most common include:
- difficulty interpreting what others are thinking or feeling (including body language, facial expressions, and social cues);
- intense special interests;
- repetitive or ritualistic behaviors;
- trouble managing and regulating emotions;
- difficulty understanding idioms or nonliteral language;
- difficulty with conversational skills (keeping a conversation going or the natural give-and-take of a conversation);
- strict daily routines or becoming emotionally distressed when routines are changed;
- trouble with using vocal or emotional inflection while speaking.
But whether a diagnosis is given in childhood or adulthood, the important thing is getting it right.
Image credits: Hongwei FAN/Unsplash (not the actual photo)
"As a neurodevelopmental disorder, autism can be challenging to diagnose. There are no physical differences or indications of autism. Instead, the child's behavior, communication, and social skills are where to look for the presence of autism," wrote David F. Velkoff, M.D., the medical director and co-founder of the Drake Institute of Neurophysical Medicine, and a leading expert in treating ADD/ADHD, and ASD.
"Parents, teachers, childcare workers, and others who regularly interact with the child are usually the first to notice delayed or atypical development. Active monitoring and regular check-ins will help make sure symptoms are identified as early as possible. One common misdiagnosis of autism, such as confusing it with ADHD, can best be avoided by tracking your child's development and noting any and all symptoms."
However, a mere opinion that someone has ASD is nowhere near enough to ascribe them to the diagnosis. "If signs of autism are present, your pediatrician may perform an autism evaluation," Velkoff said. "They will look at your child's development and whether they are reaching milestones along with peers and may observe how the child interacts with others. These processes ... help rule out the presence of other conditions similar to autism."
Part of the reason for autism misdiagnosis is that no lab test or brain scan can be used to definitively identify the condition. Maybe that's why the Redditor's mother couldn't be convinced that her son is fine, too.
"Many of my elders tell me to 'let it go' and 'move on' when they hear stories about my mom," the Redditor added. "They do love and support me, but they just genuinely think that's how we deal with abuses like this. It's so sad, but that's how our elders approach things."
As people started reacting to the story, its author joined the discussion in the comments
The mom has received a lot of criticism
