Nobody’s ‘perfect’ and everyone makes mistakes from time to time—especially when it comes to something as sensitive as dating. But some behaviors are so bad that they destroy any chance at romance. While some things sound like common-sense stuff to avoid doing, unfortunately, common sense is in fairly short supply these days.
In a brutally honest and insightful AskReddit thread, the women of the internet shared the things that—in their opinion—are the biggest mistakes that single men make when they’re trying to show they’re romantically interested in you. Clinginess, negging, jealousy, lying, and thinking that being nice is a personality trait are just the tip of the iceberg. Keep scrolling to find out what to focus your personal growth on and what to avoid doing if you want to leave a decent impression.
#21
The speed at which they introduce sexual innuendo and s*x topics. It's weird when people you aren't comfortable yet start leaning in that direction,
Even when they're "just joking," you know it is actually probing in disguise and very transparently, at that.
Even when they're "just joking," you know it is actually probing in disguise and very transparently, at that.
28points
#22
Just talking about themselves the whole date and not taking any interest in anything you have to say. No follow questions. And yes making lame sexual innuendos too.
27points
#23
Never disagreeing with me.
It's suspicious and it's a red flag that you're not being honest.
It's suspicious and it's a red flag that you're not being honest.
25points
#24
Ghosting or suddenly starting to mistreat her once you've lost interest instead of just saying it outright. The fact that you rejected me already hurts, don't make it worse by making me feel like it's something I did wrong that made you lose interest, you just didn't like me for whatever reason. I've seen perfectly kind people be rejected in the most brutal ways because the guy felt guilty about rejecting her and couldn't deal with those emotions, so they just started mistreating her, making her think she did something wrong.
25points
#25
Trauma dumping on the first date.
24points
#26
“Oh I’d love to hang out sometime”
“Yeah that sounds fun ☺️”
And then he never tries to even attempt to make a plan.
“Yeah that sounds fun ☺️”
And then he never tries to even attempt to make a plan.
24points
#27
-Being clingy/desperate. Clinginess k**ls attraction. It's not about putting on act, or being hot and cold. Just be yourself, be secure and don't make a woman you just met the center of your universe.
-Constant low effort texts. "How's it going" or "How is your day going" (this one especially when you barely know someone) get boring and basically require the recipient to do all the work in their reply
-Negging
-On a date, talking about yourself nonstop and not asking her any questions about herself or genuinely trying to get to know her as a person.
-Constant low effort texts. "How's it going" or "How is your day going" (this one especially when you barely know someone) get boring and basically require the recipient to do all the work in their reply
-Negging
-On a date, talking about yourself nonstop and not asking her any questions about herself or genuinely trying to get to know her as a person.
23points
#28
Expecting that paying for dinner entitles them to s*x.
22points
#29
Not asking any questions and actually keeping the conversation going... Ridiculously basic but shocking how many men don’t understand this, including the ones that show strong interest.
21points
#30
Showing extreme jealousy over a girl you aren't even dating. My best friend had a small bday party, and there were mostly people I knew, and some I didn't. A guy came up and told me I was very pretty and he liked my outfit. I said thank you and continued to see my friend. I started playing pool with her brother, and I looked up to see that same guy fuming and staring daggers at me. Bro, I don't know you? Why tf are you grilling me like that. It came off seriously unhinged because he did it the whole party every time I socialized with any of the guys.
19points
#31
Brag about themselves to impress you. Sometimes even exaggerating or lying.
Don’t get me wrong, if a woman is superficial it will probably work, but then you can’t really complain when you end up in a shallow relationship and she doesn’t actually give a f**k about you.
The truth is that apart from social media, which by definition is full of shallow people, and excluding younger people who also tend to be more easily impressed by the superficial, most women are not often impressed by the same things that men find impressive. And most people don’t find bragging attractive, regardless of gender.
See: men whose dating profiles feature large fish they have caught, photos of their vehicle, photos of their boat, photos of them with attractive women. Those are all things that are more likely to impress other men than women.
Don’t get me wrong, if a woman is superficial it will probably work, but then you can’t really complain when you end up in a shallow relationship and she doesn’t actually give a f**k about you.
The truth is that apart from social media, which by definition is full of shallow people, and excluding younger people who also tend to be more easily impressed by the superficial, most women are not often impressed by the same things that men find impressive. And most people don’t find bragging attractive, regardless of gender.
See: men whose dating profiles feature large fish they have caught, photos of their vehicle, photos of their boat, photos of them with attractive women. Those are all things that are more likely to impress other men than women.
Report
19points
#32
Making weird jokes too soon. Could a serial k***er joke be funny after we’ve been dating and watched the documentary together? Sure. Is it funny on the first date when you’re driving me somewhere in the dark on our first date? F**K no.
19points
#33
Trying to impress me with achievements of his parents. He might be a Mama's boy.
18points
#34
Don't go overboard on the talking about s*x... be able to talk about other things.
17points
#35
A lot of guys will either only want to talk once a week but want the women to stay committed to the concept of them, or they’ll cuss out a women they’re talking to because she didn’t answer them for 45 minutes when she was busy.
Don’t be either of those dudes. In-between is good.
Don’t be either of those dudes. In-between is good.
Report
17points
#36
Treating it like a transaction and not taking no for an answer.
You're not going to earn my interest and you're not going to convince me I'm wrong for not being interested. Be yourself, be a decent person, show that *you* are actually interested and the attraction will either be there or it won't.
You're not going to earn my interest and you're not going to convince me I'm wrong for not being interested. Be yourself, be a decent person, show that *you* are actually interested and the attraction will either be there or it won't.
Report
17points
#37
Acting completely uninterested in women as a whole. Its not a flex that u “only find me attractive”. Like ive known u for one day and ur lying.
17points
#38
Trying too hard to impress instead of just being real. It comes off as fake fast.
Report
16points
#39
Talking more than they listen. If you don’t show interest in a potential partner, she’s going to feel like you’re performing a monologue.
Report
15points
#40
Texting too much too soon and not being able to pick up on how your date prefers to use texting. I use texts to make plans. I want to go out with you and get to know you face to face, not text all day.
Report
14points
