When Elizabeth Aura McClintock, Ph.D., who, among many other areas, researches mating selection, gender, and sexuality, conducted a nationally representative survey of about 15,000 young women and men (average age 22), she found that to 82 percent of men (and 84 percent of women), being married someday is "very" or "somewhat" important.
Additionally, young women and men differ little in reported relationship commitment. "Gender differences do exist among young adults in the...data, but they do not indicate an insurmountable rift between women's and men's desired romantic trajectories," the sociologist explained.
However, that doesn't mean that guys have it all figured out. They still experience doubts. So when one Reddit post asked fellas to share their biggest insecurity as boyfriends and husbands, many agreed to show vulnerability and obliged.
#1
that i will never find a woman as awesome as the one I just buried...
I miss my best friend...
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233points
#2
The fact that I’m about to be a stay at home dad and her parents keep bothering me about what I’m gonna do. She’ll makes significantly more than I ever could and there’s literally no point in me working anymore. I just don’t like being judged.
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184points
#3
That I cannot fix every problem they have and that I am not always the problem when they’re upset. I have to let them be upset and understand it’s not always me and it’s okay to just listen to them.
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148points
#4
That I am not good enough, in any sense of the word, and that my partner is "just settling" because I'm stable.
Can't help but feel sometimes they're just waiting for something better to come alone, ya know?
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115points
#5
The person she tells you not to worry about. Trust me, we know. We can see the change in subtle behaviour and the feeling of 'losing' her.
106points
#6
I play with my daughter all the time but at the end of the day, she always prefers mummy.
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98points
#7
That im too ugly for someone as bright as her. The times i overheard ppl saying we're an unmatching pair is uncountable
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94points
#8
Not knowing why the f they would ever love me. So there must be a other reason and it can't be money.
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86points
#10
That it isn’t real. Just someone having fun with a guy who’s gullible enough to let himself think he found somebody who actually cares for him
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73points
#12
Giving them the feeling of not being there for them enough.
I tend to be very quiet and introverted. I've been told several times that I'm too much in my head and that they have the feeling I'm not "actually there". But I try to work on it and be more open about my feelings and stuff
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69points
#13
That I'm not worthy of her. She's the total package and I'm just... me. What makes it really crazy is that we have been together for almost 34 years and I still feel this way. In no way, shape, or form has she shown me that this might be true. She's literally the perfect partner.
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67points
#14
Being able to afford my family the life the deserve, because they deserve it
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64points
#15
My biggest insecurity is breaking down the walls and letting someone in. I've only ever managed to fully do that once, and that girl basically just told me her problems will always trump mine, and I should just stop bringing them up to her because she doesn't care. (Pretty much word for word what she said)
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60points
#16
I married her because she is the only woman I have been with that actually makes all my insecurities go away.
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59points
#17
That one day, out of seemingly nowhere, they’ll no longer care for me. And when it happens, it hurts
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58points
#18
Well I quit my job to pursue my dream of owning my own business but it's going to take a long time to get there so right now, I'm just a stay at home dad.
I thought it'd feel awesome being at home and being with my daughter while my wife works. It is awesome being with my daughter each day but man I feel kinda crappy now being a stay at home dad, like I'm not doing my part as a husband and father.
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54points
#19
For me it's feeling like i'm a drag on my partners life. I have several health issues that leave me in extreme pain near constantly, constantly sleep deprived and without any energy or motivation to do anything besides lay in bed and watch tv or listen to music while cuddling with my girlfriend. Meanwhile my girlfriend is a perfectly healthy, energetic and full of life young adult who wants new experiences and doesn't want to spend a minute more than she needs to resting. I try my best to keep up and if i can't do a certain activity she wants to try, i actively encourage her to do whatever it is she is wanting to do (i.e go to an amusement park, go on a road trip, go carting, activities like that) with her friends, but at the end of the day the unavoidable truth is i am a damper on her life and i don't see why someone like that is willing to be in a relationship with someone like me.
54points
#20
That I'll be made fun of if I'm vulnerable. It's happened before, and it's hard to really trust like that again. You wonder "will this be held against me?" wether it's teasing or in a fight. or if she'll tell her friends.
48points