That’s why, to help restore people's faith in love, we’ve compiled a list of stories from married couples as they reveal how exactly they knew their spouse was the one. Fair warning: you may turn into a pile of mush after reading these posts.
More info: Reddit
#1
And he made me laugh.
Ten years on, still making me laugh every day.
#2
#3
he made a chicken noise back.
true love.
Would it shock you to know that around 40% of married couples were friends before they actually started dating? It does make sense, because a good emotional connection and a great camaraderie can help form a solid base for a relationship. A lot of the answers on this list say just that, which is great news because it may just help widen your dating pool!
We decided to reach out to one married couple, Vamsi and Brennen, to hear exactly how they knew their partner was the one. We also asked them for advice on how to maintain a relationship like this and keep it strong. You can find their answers below.
#4
#5
#6
In love ever since.
We first spoke to Vamsi Krishna, who goes by the artist name Evoke. She is a singer-songwriter and vocal coach who teaches Western vocal techniques and songwriting to students of all ages and walks of life. She has also released some original singles independently in English, Hindi, and Telugu. We asked Vamsi how she knew Brennen was the one.
Vamsi said: “We actually got to know each other at a deeper level when we both were part of a musical show in our college. I was singing, and he was dancing. That fun and excitement was a really conducive atmosphere for us to get closer as friends. We used to hang out post rehearsals and just lose track of time, it was like the whole world around us would melt away when we were together.”
“I had never felt this level of magic and comfort with anyone before. It was honestly not just one moment, it was many beautiful moments that just made our love flow naturally and easily. He always had a way of making me feel special and truly cared for. It's the same even to this day, after 16 years of being together and 9 years of marriage,” she added.
#7
#8
We had only been dating for three months, so still some awkwardness here and there. I was working an outrageous amount, and I got phone call that one of my very good friends had just died in a car accident.
I don't really remember walking there, but instead of my apartment, I ended up at hers. She opened the door to her new boyfriend half-ugly-sobbing.
Instead of being (rightly) weirded out, she listened and cried with me for a couple hours.
The friend who died was the one who had encouraged me (for like six months) to ask my now-wife out. My friend never knew the impact she had.
My wife and I have been married for 15 years now.
#9
We knew each other for a couple of months when we both got invited to a mutual friends' birthday party. She wasn't feeling great, but she came anyway, because there were some others there that we hadn't seen for quite a bit and she wanted to say hi. So, after a few hours she said she felt worse, and asked if someone could help her get home. So a friend and I said sure, we'll walk with you. We walked the way to her house, which was about 15 minutes, and when we got there she got dizzy and was on the verge of feinting. I saw her wobble, grabbed on to her and then she just sagged in my arms. Only for a few seconds, but she was out of it. She opened her eyes, looked at me, and BLAM! Fireworks, butterflies, everything all at once.
This was at her parents house, so her father walked into the hallway to look wat was going on and he saw me there holding his daughter and gave me a 'stern look', untill she explained what happened.
We went on a date a few weeks later, and that was the first day of 19 years so far.
We also got to hear Brennen’s side of the story. Teaching since 2010, Brennen Thomas is an ICP-certified skating coach and national medalist who works with students across Mumbai to provide private and group coaching.
Brennen shared that he and Vamsi “started out as friends [and then] became best friends. Even though I was generally a quiet person, I [couldn't stop] talking to her. There was a genuine want to watch each other progress and grow. It felt very natural: the jokes, the compliments, and the feeling of being valued.”
“There were multiple coincidences–saying the same things at the same time. For me, our hearts and bodies fit just right, I never felt like she was a stranger. There was always a feeling of extreme familiarity and comfort. Many meant-to-be moments and alignment of events. Other than that, she's of course, beautiful, talented, and has a beautiful, strong positive vibe,” he shared.
#10
We've been together 18 years this year, 11 married and have a teenage daughter now.
#11
#12
We’d been together 3 months, we were 17 & 18 at the time. We’re now 42 & 43, and he’ll still make random bird noises at me sometimes. One of our teens joins in sometimes, the other is more likely to meow at us from across the room.
It encapsulated the fact that he didn’t care what other people thought, just that he wanted to make me smile. (Also we now know that it’s because we’ve both got ADHD and we bounce off each-other).
Even if you have the best relationship, it’s still essential to maintain it and keep the spark alive. We asked Vamsi and Brennen what advice they would give to newly married couples to sustain their connection.
Brennen said, “be patient with each other. There will be times when you both are not on the same page or aren't at the same level mentally and emotionally. Have compassion and try not to over react [about] things just out of habit. Be self-aware and try to resolve things with love and understanding, no matter how much it's triggering you in the moment.”
“Expressing emotions, feelings, and thoughts, letting the other person in, in a vulnerable way, really deepens the relationship and makes them feel like they're a team with you. Always keep developing yourself, too. The more you progress spiritually and have better emotional control, develop self love and confidence, the more you can feel love for your spouse and the happier you will be together,” he added.
#13
I know it’s normal for most healthy relationships, but we can just be goofballs together, but also take care of the serious business when the time calls for it. Prior to my now wife, most relationships seemed to be lacking that balance.
#14
This was from an executive in the advertising industry who was five years younger than me, and yet she had climbed higher on the corporate ladder. She’s an absolute rockstar in the corporate world, she’s stunning, literally a head turner in any bar (and stubborn in not admitting that she does actual turn heads) and the most family oriented person you can imagine.
We’ve been together 12 years now, married 10, two boys and we have dinner every night as a family. I still can’t believe she’s mine.
#15
It seems like the best way to have a good marriage is to keep working on yourself and treat your partner like a teammate rather than a rival. Vamsi shared her advice for newly married couples. She said, “honestly, the biggest thing I've learned in this marriage is: humility goes a long way. Ego has no place in a loving marriage.”
“Arguing and fighting with your spouse, just to feel like you're right, doesn't get you anywhere good. Knowing when to apologize and [the] willingness to change something causing the relationship trouble is so important from both ends. Basically, both of us need to have a strong desire for peace and a happy, strong marriage.”
She also added that “honesty and vulnerability are great in a marriage. Also creating a safe space for each other to be honest and vulnerable without making them feel guilty or judged. Other than that, remember to just have fun by yourself and [with] each other!”
#16
#17
We have been married almost 40 years. Best thing that has EVER HAPPENED to me.
It can happen.
#18
Fifteen minutes. Seven green flags. One OMG. I knew. It was unmistakable, and I had no doubts.
I fought to marry her: Family. The state. People who didn’t want us to marry because they thought marriage was a bad idea for everyone.
We married anyway.
We have been married for 14 years.
I still have no doubts.
There are people who doubt the institution of marriage.
Don’t be one of those people. Don’t doubt yourself.
Even with all these stories about knowing the relationship was meant to be, it might still be tough to know what makes someone perfect for you. We decided to pose the question to Vamsi and Brennen so that they could give folks pointers on how to spot “the one” in their lives.
Vamsi explained that “it should never feel hard, at least in the beginning. Talking should feel easy, [with] no unnecessary games, [and] no complications. Most importantly, even mundane things should feel beautiful with this person.”
She added that “it's easy to enjoy a well-planned fun date with anyone, but who can you see [yourself] grocery shopping with, doing laundry, or sitting in traffic with and still having a great time?”
Brennen added that you should “just ask yourself: Even at our worst, would I still be happier being with this person, working things out, or would I genuinely be happier being by myself?”
#19
I had some pretty deep rooted trauma and friendzoned him for 10 years and he just waited for me...i genuinely enjoyed his company and I realized I had the perfect guy right under my nose the entire time and initiated us dating, but was very traumatized so our [intimate] life was pretty much non existent... he would just sit there with me and let me be. He made me feel safe and that's when I knew he was the one. .
#20
