"The Marriage Lasted Two Months": 62 Times Wedding Guests Realized The Couple Was Basically Doomed

I was the groom. A bunch of friends/coworkers (military) gave us 6 months at our courthouse wedding. We had dated for 6 months, 2 of which she was deployed.

Our 30th anniversary will be this April. Frick those guys, lol.

When the best man (groom's roommate) gave a 30 + min toast about how much he was going to miss living with the groom, how horrible it would be not having him in his life everyday, started crying and kept talking about how much he loved the groom. Both men were crying and hugging each other.

That marriage lasts 2 years. The Best Man and groom have been married about 5 years now last I heard.

The Bride's daughter (6yo from previous relationship) asked the bride for water and she screamed "Shut Up! You are the reason I am in therapy!" in front of a big group of guests, then the bride went back to socializing.

They had two fights during the ceremony.

One was during the vows, he was wearing sunglasses (outdoor wedding) and she ripped them off and said “you will look me in the eye when you say this.” The second was during the ring exchange. He said he couldn’t wear it because he couldn’t wear it at work and she said “well you aren’t at work now, are you”

Other highlights of the wedding: he wore jeans, a leather vest, no shirt; all the bridesmaids were barefoot; the ONLY drinks were bud lite in the bed of the pickup which was filled with ice (there were kids at the wedding but frick their needs I guess); and a motorcycle shaped grooms cake.

People do not believe me when I say how redneck my family is.

In both vows, they apologized for previous and vow not to commit domestic v****e anymore


Everyone was mouth open in shock.

The bride’s vows were all about how much she loved him. The groom’s vows were all about how he had to tolerate her. He sucked.

When the groom shoved wedding cake into his new wife's mouth hard enough to give her a bloody lip and kept pushing her backwards until she fell and broke her wrist.

If the groom smashes cake on the brides face, even a little bit!!!

None of us had met my friends fiancee prior to the wedding. We all immediately knew, but especially when we were all hanging out after the ceremony and someone mentioned something during a story she (the bride) was telling and she yells "DO NOT INTERRUPT ME WHILE I AM TALKING!", and then goes back to telling her story. Everyone froze, including her friends. My friend who married her claims thats the first time he really saw her true self (they only dated 6 months before getting engaged).

Surprisingly the wedding lasted 5 (miserable) years.

We were placing bets in the parking lot before the reception, and then the groom's mom introduced me to some family as "the one M should have married". I was married holding my infant, and M and I had never dated. Lasted about a year (their wedding, mine is 19 years and counting, happily!).

I sang at the wedding. As I went through the reception line, the bride hugged me and said, “That was lovely. You can sing at my next wedding too!”.

Im ordained and have done a good amount of weddings. The biggest indicator to me has always been mismatched guest lists. Like she has 8 bridesmaids and 100 guests and he has Tyler from middle school and his Mom. 


Its not that she has too many people or that he's doesn't have enough, its that they are not even enough. That always works out to be that the one with a bigger social group going out far more frequently while the other sits at home and grows resentful. That resentment grows until the relationship is over.

When I heard that the groom invited his best buddy and his gf to come on the honeymoon with them.

We were only at the reception. The bride was 5 months pregnant and drinking. The groom was extremely intoxicated from multiple substances. They danced once, but not for the whole song, and spent most of the reception apart, with their respective friend groups.

The groom said I guess instead of I do.

She cried and cried at the end of the night when it was time for them to go home. She just wanted to stay with us, her friends. She's married again now to an amazing guy and has a baby.

I showed up to photograph the getting ready part of the day, and the mother of the bride came up and said, ‘The storm has passed! We’re good to go!’ I asked what she meant. Apparently the bride and groom got into a fight the night before (after the rehearsal) and said they were calling off the wedding… but never mind! They did not last a year.

The bride was barely paying attention during their vows, messed around rolling her eyes while the vicar was talking about love and god and whatnot (it was her church), and only lasted about 30 seconds into the first dance before she went and danced with her friends instead. Turned out, to no one’s surprise, she was already cheating on him before they got married.

The bride danced by herself to I Will Survive.

Watching the groom smash cake in his brides’s face, then be frog-marched out of the venue by her father and brothers, only to be brought back in looking like he’d gotten into a fistfight with all of them. 

It lasted a little while longer, but still that was too long; she remarried later on to a very nice man and her ex died of a heart attack very young. He was a druggie and a drunk by then. Maybe he always was.

They only married because she was pregnant but she regretted that choice—pushed on her by her very religious family—every day of her life. And she was tied to him for decades, because they shared a kid together. .