Being a parent is stressful. Being a single parent is stressful and a half.
But is that really a good enough reason to put your 5-year-old in the care of a stranger because of a last-minute emergency?
That’s what one Redditor found himself questioning after his new roommate, whom he’d only spoken to once, dropped her daughter off with him for the entire day. While he didn’t mind looking after the child, he couldn’t believe she’d placed that much trust in him so quickly. Now he’s wondering: is this something CPS should get involved in?
Read on for the full story and how the internet responded. And of course, let us know what you think of the ordeal.
The woman left her toddler with a new roommate she’d just met due to an unexpected emergency
Image credits: EyeEm / freepik (not the actual photo)
He stepped in to help, but he’s starting to wonder if this is something CPS should know about
Image credits: EmilyStock / freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: thriwawaaayyy2341
When is it appropriate to call Child Protective Services?
Image credits: SkelDry / freepik (not the actual photo)
Children are among the most vulnerable members of society, and in the U.S. alone, over 550,000 children experience confirmed cases of mistreatment each year.
If you see a child in a situation that doesn’t sit right, it’s completely natural to feel uneasy and wonder if someone needs to get involved.
At the same time, deciding to report a parent or guardian is a serious and sensitive action.
It’s not always easy to draw the line. Maybe you saw something troubling, but you’re unsure if it crosses a line. You don’t want to misinterpret a moment of exhaustion, stress, or a genuine emergency, like the one described in this story, and end up making a report that isn’t necessary. So how do you know when it’s the right call?
Ellen Smith, a clinical associate professor and child welfare training coordinator at the University of Wisconsin, acknowledges that hesitation.
“Child Protective Services,” she told Fatherly, “has the power to intervene in one of the most fundamental relationships that Americans have: the right for parents to make decisions about how to take care of their own children.”
According to Smith, there are three main circumstances that may warrant a call to CPS:
- Physical harm or threat of harm: If a child has visible injuries, or you believe there’s a real risk of violence.
- Sexual concerns: If you observe troubling behavior, such as grooming-like actions or signs that suggest the child may be experiencing inappropriate contact or exposure.
- Neglect: If the child appears to be living in unsafe conditions, such as being left alone for long stretches without supervision or basic needs not being met.
That said, it’s just as important to be certain there’s a real risk before reaching out.
Ayoka Chapple, a social worker with the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services, explains that suspicions alone aren’t enough. For example, seeing a parent who appears intoxicated doesn’t necessarily mean the child is in danger. Reports should be based on observable concerns, not assumptions.
Before contacting CPS, there are other steps you can consider. Adoption.com notes that having a conversation with the parent may help. Expressing concern directly and kindly can sometimes open the door for support they didn’t know how to ask for.
You could also check in with the child (if appropriate) to ask how they’re doing and get a better sense of the situation.
In urgent cases, however, CPS may not be the right call; law enforcement may be. If you witness something that seems to place a child in immediate danger, it’s the police you should contact right away.
One common misconception, according to Smith, is that CPS functions like law enforcement. “We’re not in the punishment business,” she says. “We’re in the business of keeping kids safe in their homes.”
Reporting to CPS carries real weight and should be done with care. But if you sense that something is off and you’re concerned for a child’s safety, it helps to understand what to watch for and when it’s time to take action.
He later revealed that the woman didn’t return until the evening
Some readers felt this wasn’t serious enough to involve CPS
Others, however, thought leaving a child like that was incredibly irresponsible
Several pointed out that both of them were in the wrong here
