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'Learn Useless Talents': 40 Useless But Very Cool-Looking Things You Can Learn To Impress Others
FunnyOCT 14, 2022

'Learn Useless Talents': 40 Useless But Very Cool-Looking Things You Can Learn To Impress Others

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When we think about talents, we often imagine something cool, valuable and impressive. From painting to playing an instrument, these abilities immediately bring us into the spotlight and make us a teeny tiny bit better than anyone born without them.
But this online group celebrates exactly the opposite of that. Welcome to the “Learn Useless Talents” subreddit, a miscellaneous home to 694k members who share not just talents, but the most useless ones of all.
“This is a place to learn how to do cool things that have no use other than killing time and impressing strangers,” the group’s description reads, so I leave the stage to some of the best (and most useless!) posts posted here.

#1 Ima Do This

Ima Do This
Report
570points

#2 How To Gird Up Your Loins When The Wedding Party Is Over

How To Gird Up Your Loins When The Wedding Party Is Over
570points

#3 How To Tell Apart Various Language Writings

How To Tell Apart Various Language Writings
Report
452points

When we speak about learning new skills, whether it’s something we’re talented in or not, it’s impossible not to address people’s obsession with improving themselves and becoming better in one way or another. Life hacks seem to be everywhere these days, from little things like easily opening stuck jar lids to more profound ones like becoming more productive and learning to use your time wisely on a daily basis.

To better understand this phenomenon that has been everywhere on social media, we reached out to Mike Sturm, a productivity and personal growth expert, who thinks that the current obsession with life hacks is about 2 main things.

“First, we love to be inventors and discoverers. If we believe we've come up with something no one else has, or discovered something that very few others know about, we get a kick out of it. Secondly, many of us really believe that making everything we do as efficient as possible is the way to a great life,” Sturm argues.

#4 How To Float

How To Float
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445points

#5 How To Split A Donut

How To Split A Donut
422points

#6 How To Make A Grim Reaper Puppet Using Your Sleeve And Hand

How To Make A Grim Reaper Puppet Using Your Sleeve And Hand
421points

On the other hand, “the problem is that if you make something super-efficient, but it's something you probably should have stopped trying to do long ago, you're not any better for it. In fact, you're probably worse off—because you've invested time and energy on this thing that really doesn't bring value to your life,” the productivity coach explained.

#7 How To Make An Amazing Sofa Fort

How To Make An Amazing Sofa Fort
380points

#8 How To Properly Peal A Post-It Note From The Stack

How To Properly Peal A Post-It Note From The Stack
368points

#9 How To Make A Shadow Turtle

How To Make A Shadow Turtle
353points

Our obsession with life hacks indicates that we spend a lot of time thinking that what makes for a good life has a lot to do with how we are perceived by others. “Do they think we're cool, smart, innovative, strong, etc.? But what others think of us—even what those close to us think—is just a proxy for what's more important: are we bringing value to others? Are we uncovering meaningful truths in the world? Are we genuinely improving some small part of the world?” Sturm wonders.

“But often times, the things that go viral and get you noticed quickly are not what brings the most value,” he added.

#10 How To Make A Pants Backpack

How To Make A Pants Backpack
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345points

#11 How To Make A Shower For A Small Bird

How To Make A Shower For A Small Bird
340points

#12 Learn How To Draw A Sheep

Learn How To Draw A Sheep
332points

It’s also worth noting that a lot of life hacks surfing online seem to be either absurd or totally useless, aka how to peel a cucumber with cling tape. In response to this, Sturm quoted Peter Drucker: "There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all."

According to Sturm, we only get one shot at this life (that we know of). “And while I can't deny that it's fun sometimes to figure out novel ways to peel vegetables with household items, there's only a small amount of that kind of stuff that brings real value to your life. There are things that are worth working on to make more efficient. Those are the things that need to be done, because if they're not, then what's important to you will suffer,” he explained.

#13 Owlpple

Owlpple
322points

#14 Well, Then

Well, Then
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317points

#15 Nato Phonetic Alphabet

Nato Phonetic Alphabet
316points

Sturm argues that what this all comes down to is getting clear on what's important to you—really important. “What do you want out of this life? What needs to happen for your life to get that way? And if you're not sure yet what you want out of life, then that's the most important thing for you to do right now,” he said and added that “no amount of finding better ways to do mundane things will find that out for you.”

#16 Does Learning Strange Spoken Language Rules Count?

Does Learning Strange Spoken Language Rules Count?
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310points

#17 How To Shake Ankles

How To Shake Ankles
303points

#18 How To Survive Being Buried Alive

How To Survive Being Buried Alive
295points

#19 The Gentlemans Guide To Amputation

The Gentlemans Guide To Amputation
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290points

#20 How To Fold A Napkin To Fit Three Pieces Of Silverware

How To Fold A Napkin To Fit Three Pieces Of Silverware
Report
284points
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